A.N. OTHER.

Observer, Volume XL, Issue 26, 28 February 1920, Page 26

A.N. OTHER.

A writer declares that anonymity in the sporting arena is often due to, business reasons:— The fast bowler, too — Whom gentle ladies a treasure, Would be)annoyed if they were told ' That oft he knocked out "stumps" with pleasure. . : " The banker who .bowls wily lobs, Quite soon might find his bank in ruins, Did he not keep his. secret safe, To wit—his "underhanded" doin e s - The lawyer, who at footer shines, And on the field so fiercely barges, Must never let the public know He's fond of making "heavy charges," Th© doctor, keen on boxing bouts, With fist as hard as any mallet, Would scare off patients, if they learned How frequently he "tapped the claret." —"The Looker-On."

THE REAL STATE OF THINGS.

(A well-known cinema player deplores the widespread belief that "stars" who depict a certain type pf character behave similarly in private life.) A wild buffoon in Filmland's realm, At home I've milder habits: In hours of ease I grow peas And dote on rearing rabbits; And when I meet upon his beat An inoffensive bobby, To cuff and clout and lay him out Is not my favourite kobby. My headgear isn't quaintly small, My garments don't need mending; I scorn such tricks as planting ticks On portly men caught bending;, I don't glad-eye fair passers-by, I'm not weak-kneed or bandy, Nor do I rush to wield the brush When whitewash pails are handy. At restaurants I don't evoke The plaudits of spectators ' By tearing tripe, or hurling ripe Tomatoes at the waiters; And those who've seen me on the screen Afflicted with a "head" I'll Bβ pleased to know that I can jhow A treasured Temperance r 2s!' t J. Whitjha.fsh.

They talk about driving the Kaiser to trial daily in a closed carriage. But why not make • him come by Tube? That's the stuff to give him! —"Lady's Pictorial."

Patronise the Hotel Bolsheviki; two thousand rooms and a bath.— "Purple Cow,"

By the time a woman has learned how to kisß there is no longer any pleasure in kissing her. — "Smart Set."