THE PLAYTHING.

Observer, Volume XXXVIII, Issue 4, 29 September 1917, Page 2

THE PLAYTHING.

Pietist v. Public

THE Hohenzollerns are doomed. The Hapsburgs will, ere long, totter dismally to the river, or the dagger or the pistol and end the whole thing in the traditional way. Abdul, the Damned will be. For all practical purposes the war is over. New Zealand, after three years' war-time 10 o'clock hotel closing, has reduced the hours and the hotels are to be closed at 6 o'clock.. Initially the demand was made in order to protect the. soldier from alcohol. It cannot protect the soldier in France, or Belgium, or Egypt, or Palestine, but it, is hoped with great unction that it will:save fathers \of families in the Second Division from, the great sin of drunkenness as.it is considered impossible that any army can control soldiers and that the people, through its' Parliamentary representatives, must rush to the aid of the soldier's soul. It occurs to one that New Zealand should have sent the Central Empires hurtling to their doom and the Sick Man of Europe to the hell from which .he came, thus ending the war in August 1914.

,v It has been shown in this war "•measure that politicians and even v Ministers do not necessarily stick to their expressed opinions, and that when the weather-vane.veers, a Minister will wobble all round the political clock. Deference to public opinion in licensing matters is deference to the livers, of a minority suffering from bile. Quite a number of New Zealand moral reformers have died of indigestion. One is

sorry for them, of course, ■ but holiness is too often illness. The public in this matter is the shuttlecock between two battledores —little parties of extremists. A "deputation of business men" (many of them suffering from acute dyspepsia) proceed to Wellington with £100,000 (loud laughter) and the intention of frightening MP's, The M.P. is a scared bird. He is easily frightened. He fears for his feathered nest. He will feed; out :of the hand. The people with the £100,000 (he! he!) made him feed out of the hand.

A remarkably few in New Zealand have made hundred's of thousands of absolutely sober, .decent, reliable people rearrange their habits because a number of people suffer from dyspepsia. Nothing, is going to happen to shut up country drapery stores, but this particular deference to indigestion will shut up very.many country hotels. These hotels are licensed to men who, in very many instances, are as estimable as. Mir Smallfield, or Mr Entrican, or any other of the people who give a moral lead' and! drag ' the Parliament at their heelsl Indigestion as a moral force is almost unbeatable. It has been said in Parliament that the closing of the hotels at six o'clock will not reduce the output (or shall we say "the intake") of alcoholic dirinks. If this is so, how is this measure going to win a war that has waged for three years, even although "a band of business men" did 1 not do this necessary thing three years ago?

The anti-shouting regulations have been, referred to as a. farce. They are ;in-reality a tragedy. You, perhaps, do not understand What tragedy means? Literally it means "playing the goat." One has no time to explain the literal fact more fully. The conclusion one comes to is that the New Zealander is one of the most patient creatures ever moulded by the hands of the Creator. He. elects, as a general habit the representative creature who will be most supine in the hands of his political superiors. Vi He has never learnt to enjoy anything. If to-morrow" some terrible criminal insisted on sobriety by placingdrinking tables on the street where the "gendarmerie" could see, them, a huge wave of sainted drapers with £250,000 in their hands"would rush' wailing vto Wellington to have the evil rooted out. We are without .humour.. The six. o'clock business and the way it has been achieved is funnier than anything Gilbert ever achieved. Is. there a war on? .No! Has Indigestion won a victory? Certainly!