THEY SAY

Observer, Volume XXXV, Issue 13, 5 December 1914, Page 7

THEY SAY

—That it's a Lang way to Tipperary—and Manukau, too. —That a quilldriver from Waihi maintains that a new Clark is not needed. —That when Kaipara declared its Coates didn't fit, the people yelled "Hoe! Hoe!" —That Parnell delights in farce and screams with laughter at a comical Storey. —That Christmas in Gisborne will be affected by the elections. Carroll in will be popular. —That the electors of Auckland East are not at all sure about Holmes for workers. —That electors of Ohinemuri are deeply interested in the war. They're Russian Poland. —That in Franklin a very large number of electors' politics are reflected in the Glass. —Tbat there is nothing significant in the fact that the initials of the member for Waikato are J. A. Y. —That Raglan has a fiery Fumess —but it will be put out. Raglan has its scow hitched to a Bollard. —That "Franklin" merely means "freeman." It is therefore explained why the Franklins work for the Masseys. —That many flowery Maori speeches are bewig made in the Bay of Islands. The local advice is "Buck in!" —That misguided Taranaki will gaze at its ballot paper and endorse it H.J.H., "0.X." Pity for blackberry land. —That in Auckland West unity is strength. Whether the hydra-head-ed will Poole their votes no man knoweth. —That Grey Lynnets desire to know, "will Murdoch McLean sweep of Fowlds. His appetite is keen. —That Adam was thrown out of Eden for Parr-taking. Wonder if the tempter hid him have a Tuck in ? Who knows ? —That many Thames miners know how to . "cut their coats according to their cloth"—they have a Taylor on the spot. —That strange as it may seem, although Thames highways are not all perfect, thousands of people -will vote against Rhodes. —That you mustn't Harris the people of Waitemata with the question, "when is the election?" The answer is "Tewsley next." —That the Mayor's advisers made a slight tactical error in not seizing the opportunity to use the fighting slogan, "Parr for Parnell." —That the favourite ' scriptural quotation in the Bay of Islands now is "what ye went out for to see; a Reed shaken hy the wind?" —That apropos Waitemata election, Mr Harris is not burning all his boats. He still has the 1911 little handbag to fall back on. —That Mr Richardson, for Auckland Central, really shouldn't quote fi(Hires at street corners. William is°quite careless as to ten or twelve millions. —That it took 12 minutes on Friday nifht to fill the Town Hall to hear Sir Joseph Ward. The licensed victuallers were most grateful for the overflow. That it is untrue that the new railway pass for M.P.'s will have a bust" of Mr Massey on the reverse and the portrait of a New Zealand soldier on the observe.

That the one question at Stratford is "Shall Stratford be B. Hine?" —That flour has gone up. This is possibly due to the demand made by the electoral rolls. —That Parnell is highly tickled with recent literary efforts—but that's another Storey. —That Masterton intends to save its bacon. It is at least sure of a Hogg for the next three years. —That as far as Riecarton is concerned, it is currantly reported that Bunn will lose his dough. —That it is likely that most of the Kaiapoi electors will go to Davy Jones' locker. Buddo can tell? —That G. M. Thompson's opponent for Dunedin North is appropriately called "A Walker." He will be! —That vide the "Star/ another Reform fiction is run to earth—but it will be used as a serial all the same. —That Westland is the only seat that is not to be contested. It is appropriate that it should be Sed-don-tary. —That it is quite wrong to assume that Holland is neutral. He's the Red Fed. candidate for Wellington Central. —That of 177 candidates for Parliament only 27 are Scotsmen. This is the best possible argument that politics don't pay. —That the appearance of a Bodkin in the political field in the South has given the Government candidate the needle. —That the question at Christchurch North is, "Is Harry Toogood for Leonard?" Leonard exclaims brightly, "Isitt?"' —That Mr F. M. B. Fisher has not' yet decided whether to return to the land agency business or to go in for professional tennis. —That the rumour that at a recent "Reform" rally, an armistice was called to bury their dead (marines) proves to be a fabrication. —That great names recur. There are twio J. Dicksons standing in the Government interest —our own Parnellite and Dickson, of Chalmers. —That a local proud mother has christened her latest Joseph Franklin William Awarua as an indication of tire winning side at the elections. —That Shakespeare's -report as to the death of Hamlet is now proved to be a canard. He is standing in the Government interest for Selwyn. —That Wellington will return to Parliament a lawyer, a carrier, an ex-wharf labourer, an Afro-Ameri-can, and a loud, tub-thumping printer. —That the age limit for Samoan soldiers has been increased to 47 to give Parliamentarians a chance of doing the things they tell other people to do. —That in the lists of Parliamentary candidates the sitting member is marked with an asterisk. The candidate who is not sitting asterisk it too. —That a great reformer has endeavoured to get the duty on champagne removed. The Government lias a large stock of Pomare, but is keeping Mumm. —That many local employers who attended Sir Joseph Ward's meeting agree that the Christmas bonus will be a "baby" bonus this year. In fact they are not sure that there will be a birth at all. —'That saddlers, bag makers, and string kit manufacturers are holding large stocks in case Waitemata should strike out the top line. The person who invents a bottle that looks like a parcel of books may make a fortune. —That when Mr Parr declared that Auckland miglilt have been lwjmbarded, many people said, "What nonsense I" "Nonsense," ot course! Mr Egerton Gill would have waved a Peace motion at the Scharnhorst and settled her. Thump it in to thick heads, Mr Mayor!

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SEALED Tenders will be received up till 12 noon, MONDAY, 14th December, 1914, for the following supplies for the VETERANS' HOME for the year 1915:— 1. BREAD 2. FUEL 3. GROCERIES 4. MEAT 5. MILK Forms of tender and conditions, giving full details, can be seen at Mitchelson and Co.'s Office, Little Queen Street, Auckland. Tenders must be marked outside the envelope "Tenders for Supplies for Veterans' Home," addressed C/o Mitchelson and Co., Little Queen Street, Auckland. The lowest or any tender not necessarily accepted. ROBERT CARPENTER, Major, Superintendent.

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