THINGS THE OBSERVER WOULD LIKE TO KNOW

Observer, Volume XXXIII, Issue 9, 9 November 1912, Page 11

THINGS THE OBSERVER WOULD LIKE TO KNOW

—Whether Devonport's Councillor Nixon is overflowing with brotherly love for Constable Dwyer ? Move on !

—Will Sammy Vaile be appointed Railways Manager ? At last his theories are to be considered by the Hduse.

—If .in the opinion of the police the perambulating whiskey store, captxired the other clay is not " a loiig felt want"?

—If a hospital official could possibly strain at a mutton bone and swallow a large Quantity of first-class lindleiiin ?

—Whether Maydr Parr's "party predelictions" will suffer a change now that the Orakei Suburb Bill has been " reformed " ?

—If the police ever stroll inio. any of the cheap-jack auction emporiums in Queen-street to watch the methods of the salesmen ?

—What's gone wrong with boxing as a money making pursuit ? Have the plate auctioneers discarded the mittens for the " muft's " ?

—If the poor patronage given the daylight Trunk express implies that travellers' desire to cling to Auckland until the last possible minute ?

—Why Semple and "Webb left Waihi ? Rumour has it that they may be looking for work, but this is an insolent assumption they will probably deny.

—Whether as an eminent lawyer remarked, " framing a bill of costs is a lost art." All the lawyers one knows seem to be past masters in this amuseing specialty.

—Which members of the Hospital Board Mayor Parr had in mind when he told the Grammar school old boys that there was room for their ability on the Board ?

Whether Mr Gerald Peacocke is altogether grieved that the WaihiTauranga railway is to be stopped ? It will give him another opportunity to spread his tale.

If Mr H. E. A. Milnes was really serious in suggesting that a Rhodes , scholar should be appointed physical instructor for schools ? It sounds rather like a joke.

—If the prisoner who broke his cell window as a protest against too much hard w.ork at the tree planting camp im't an indication that suffragett? methods are spreading ?

—If those stalwarts, Messrs Webb end Semple, really skedaddled over a fence when the police charged at Waihi ? The great leaders seem almost human, after all.

—What "Captain" Thomas lies done with the Hospital Board's bone of contention ? It is to be hoped he has not spirited it away as it may be required as an exhibit later.

How dare the Bayfield Methodist tinker with the calendar by having their " Annual Christmas Tree " on November 6th ? Couldn't they push New Year's Day into March ?

—What the Ferry Co. is going to do about the threatened importation of aerobikes (winged wheels) to Auckland ? And if the Harbour Board will collect fees from trans-harbour bikist3 ?

—Whether the Remuera Ratepayers' Association, and Mr J. H. Hannan in particular, are as competent authorities on epidemic disease as Health Officer Makgill, or whether they only think they are ?

—If it is true that Magistrate Kettle is taking steps to have the many lovable qualities of Mr J. H. Hannan, J.P., recognised by the presentation to that illustrious public benefactor of a purse of sovereigns ?

—Whether Buckiumper Bill MacDonald, M.P., has any knowledge of economics ? He told Finance Minister Allan that the country was never in a better financial position than when Reform came into office. (Shrieks of mirth in which our great grandchildren join),