PARS ABOUT PEOPLE

Observer, Volume XXXII, Issue 20, 27 January 1912, Page 4

PARS ABOUT PEOPLE

II ANY years ago when Sir If 1 Joe Ward was a mere

titleless M.H.R., he wore a heavy moustache and sidewhiskers. Later on, when he became Colonial Treasurer, the sidewhiekers disappeared, and only the heavy moustache remained. Still later, when he succeeded to the billet of Prime Minister, the heavy moustache was delicately clipped, and was transformed into a dainty little adornment with waxed ends. Mr Massey is evidently anticipating events, as he has recently had his "sideboards" removed, and now goes about in a most bare-faced manner. The moustache and the silvery tuft on the chin still remain, but if he becomes Prime Minister, perhaps these aleo will disappear However, it is a pronounced habit with politicians to lose their hair.

M. J. Coyle, of the Hospital and Charitable Aid Board, eaye that there is "a spirit of unrest" amongst the nurses at the hospital. For the matter of that, from all appearances, there is, and has been lor come time, a spirit of tmrest amongst the members of the Hospital Board. But so far-as the nurses are concerned, a spirit of unrest 's perhaps natural, and the number or resignations can't be taken as any reliable criterion. Nurses, aft or the fashion of the divine feminine all the world over, have a hankering after matrimony, which iw olves the relinquishment of a profession vhich is, in nine cases out of ten, of a purely temporary nature. M. J. Coyle can do many things, but he cannot yet control the workings of the feminine mind. Which, perhaps, is just as well.

The position in regard to the protest against the erection of the new Mental Hospital at Point Chevalier, pemaine unaltered. Mr J. Payne, M.P. for Grey Lynn, has telegraphed from Napier to the Mayor (Mr C. J. Parr) stating that the movement against the erection of the building on the site proposed will have his active support. With John Payne's support, one can consider the deed as done.

Most people have heard of Robert Macadre* the French adventurer , thief, 'but probably few are aware that there is another Robert Macaire 'at {present living in New Plymouth, although whether the New Plymouth Robert is a descendant of the French person, this deponent knoweth not. Anyway, the Taranaki Macaire has set to work to tackle the liquor problem, and has published a pamphlet entitled "The Disease and the Remedy." Robert modestly describes himself as a "student of moral philosophy in the University of Mankind, and graduate in the School of Experience." Robert, it appears, belongs to the more or less noble army of moderates, and h« comes to light with sixteen proposals for the improvement of the Trade, including the abolition of tied houses, of "shouting," and of batrmaidfil. Uhcibivalrous Robert ! What have the poor Hebes done that he should want to shoo them off the premises. * Judging by Robert's style, there is a good deal oT the John Payne about him. Just fancy having two John Paynes in the country. It would no longer be God's Own Country, but Pain's Own Country.

Melbourne "Punch" on Sir Joe : Exit—very soon—Sir Joseph. Ward, and his tumble from glory has been a bad one. The solid party left behind by Digger Dick Seddon dwindled slowly for years, and has now gone with a crash. Less than a year ago Sir Joseph went to London to the Imperial Conference with ready-made schemes for Empire consolidation in his, pocket. Deakin having fallen, Ward raced to England conscious that his was the greatest of opportunities. He would (he thought) be the central figure in that august Council of Greater Britain. Previously Deakin and Laurier both had always eclipsed him hopelessly. But though Sir Joseph spread himself magnificently on the subject of Empire, all his _ ambitious resolutions were pushed aside by the Conference. He got a baronetcy— a showy consolation prize; but when he went back to New Zealand the baronetcy was one of the thinge which dragged him under. • • *

R. W. (''Bob") Carpenter, erstwhile of the "Star," has been appointed editor of the " N.Z. Graphic," in euccession to C. C. Reade, who, as mentioned in last week's Observer, is going Home. Bob is c genial soul, endowed with a ready wit and a facile style, and we confidently predict a successful career for him in the editorial chair. •-' • • •

The Hon. Tarn Mackenzie seems to have put his foot in it with his remark concerning Rotorua and Hanmer. The Hon. Tarn, it will be remembered, recently came to light with some caustic remarks concerning State control of the tourist resorts mentioned, and these remarks were scattered broad-cast by the daily Press. It was a significant fact that, a day or two afterwards, the Hon. Tarn gave vent to what was practically a retractation of his previous utterances. The probable explanation is that Sir Joseph Ward, on reading the said utterances, sent a prompt remonstrance to the Hon. Tarn for opening his mouh so wide, and the Hon. Tarn, having donned sackcloth and sat down in ashes, tendered the amende honorable. It is a ticklish job being a Ministerespecially in these days of uncertain tenure. Anyway, the Minister for Eotoruamast expect to be in hot water sometimes.

Lord and Lady Islington are just now enjoying the pleasures of campingout op in the Rotorua Lakeland. Their marquees and things are pitched in a beautiful lakeside nook, close to the old Maori village of Te Awahou, on the western side of Kotorua. It is a place which the tourist doesn't frequent, for which the Islingfcons are, no doubt, duly thankful. A beautiful stream, the Awahou, as clear as glasu, flows down past their camp to the lake, and trout pass the door—and sometimes look in for breakfast if their Excellencies happen to have an early-morning-fishing fit on. It's well to be a Governor and a Governor's lady these summer days.

Maggie Papakura, the muchtravelled and much boomed Maggie, ran into a real Donnybrook fair up at Whakarewarewa the other day. In the row which followed the arrival of the Maori troupe of entertainers, back from London without a bean in their pockets, the silvery-tongued guide nearly had her head broken. It must have been a lively affair, that welcome home. Maggie is personally very unpopular amongst her people, and that unfortunate tour of the Maori party hasn't improved matters. But, behind

this feeling, there was another factor that undoubtedly contributed to the broken heads at " Whaka." • • •

Aporo, one of the best-liked members of the team, died on the voyage to London from Australia, and, in accordance with old Maori custom,, the people who took him away from his home must be held responsible for his non-return ; they should, in Maori eyes, have taken better care of him. Hence, the hard words and the stick* that flew in the geyaerland village. Present writer has witnessed several instances of this custom in the Rotorua country, following upon the death of natives when away from their homes. But the unhappy financial circumstances of the team accentuated the trouble considerably. Maggie will have more peace and honour away from Geyserland.

Says Sydney Bulletin: This, perhaps, is the moment when Amundsen and Scott are fighting oat toe finish of their race to the Pole. Both are declared triers, and the eyes of the world are on the race, though nobody can see anything of it, or know abouc it, till it is all -over. Amundsen is reckoned by Fridjof Nansen, who ought to know, to be the best Polar explorer at the game to-day. Beside him Scott is an amateur. On the other hand, Scott has an expedition and an equipment whose like has never gone south before. Shackleton's expedition was a box of toys and a Noah's ark by comparison ; and so is Amundsen'e. Scott'e chief object has been, certainly, the elimination of all risk. Amundsen does not heed the risk. His aim has been speed. He may have to starve a bit, but he doeen't mind that, so long as he gets there first. The getting back aeemi tobe quite an unimportant detail with him, except that a man has to get back to tell the story of how he gob forward. Otherwise, the return track doesn't concern him.

London " Watchdog." (late "M.A.P."), in the latest issue tohand, asks: "Who is the right houoarable baronet who has lost hie heart to a Maori girl V This doesn't refer to Maggie Papakura, whose reported fiancee is only a plain Mister. Iwa, the pretty contralto from Geyserland, is still in London, and most likely she is the damsel indicated. Also, the fifteen-year-old girl Te Tai, who refused to return to ftiew Zealand with her grandfather, old Mita Taupopoki—the boss man of Whakarewarewa —ia seeing life in London with Iwa* and she may have captured the fancy of some youthful sprig of the British, aristocracy. It looks ac if our brown sisters were going to follow the example ot the Yankee dollar-girls ia annexing susceptible Britishers of blue blood. In our case, however, the Britishers have to supply the dollar* themselves. No Maori is without a long pedigree, and the brown girls can _ supply sufficient " blue blood "for two* if neoessary.

J. J. Hammond, the New Zealand aviator, has fully recovered from his serious illness, and with Mrs Hammond is leaving for Europe. He expects to return, next summer with several aeroplanes and to enter upon commercial exploitation of the flying industry in Australia. Hammond has been singularly free from accidents, and yet he has made some remarkably fine flights. He is blessed with a phlegmatic temperament and has absolutely refused to be induced by the applause of crowds to attempt hare-brained performances.

Vr. (Jiiarles Harnss, who piloted the mucn booweu aaiu very mucii uwei'-raoeu oneiaeid unoir round tnese puitts, ib buiKing 01 inaugurating Muoojim , worm's tour. 10 vvouiu be preierabie v , Jiariibs pubiisned a Daianc-esheec ot tne iaac Lour. We note tnat vr. coward, wno was tne conaucwr, alleges tnao tne tour resulted in a loss oi £4U,000. Jflease pass tne salt. It tnat allegation is correct, then there inuso iiave been very lax management somewhere. The tour was run on the cneap rignt tnrough. Unly a lew of the soloists received salaries, and whenever possible, the performers were billeted out with unsophisticated householders, in order to save the expense of board and lodging. Under the circumstances it is hard to see where that £40,000 loss comes in. .

In any case, the colonial people have a right to demand a balancesheet. They supported the choir right royally, and paid through the nose for the privilege of. doing so. Also, Harriss boomed the choir ac an "Imperial " concern —a combination that was to unite the Empire in a bond of harmony, or some such flapdoodle. It wasn't a money-making affair—oh, bless you, no 1 If Harriss is prepared to loee another £40,000 by repeating the tour, all we can say is that his patriotism does him infinite credit. We doubt, however, whether he will be able to persuade any of his former choristers to accompany him. They had too stormy a time on the last occasion, and mutiny and dissension were rife from start •to finish of the trip. If Harriss is wise, he will stop where he is and get to work on that balance-sheet.

Hon. D. Buddo states that the question of the site for the auxiliary mental hospital is to be reconsidered. Just ho ; this is only in accordance with the usual tactics of the backdown Government, and last week we prophesied that the usual back-down would take place. The Point Chevalier site, of course, is eminently unsuitable for the purpose to which it is proposed to devote it, and reconsideration is justfiable enough ; but the incident only goes to show that the Government did not in the first place bestow upon the matter the deliberation that its importance demanded.

Yviiy, on why, don't tne sweet young tiangs on .one local teiepnone exonunge auopt tne Ulnnese sysoeiur jjTom a ±±onie paper we cull tne toilovving editying extract :—'"ln Uhina wutia tne subscriber rings up tne exchange tne operator may be expected to asli :. ' Wnat number does the honourable son ot the moon and. stars desire i" ' Hohi, two-three.' fciiience. Then the exchange resumes. ' Will the honourable person graciously iorgive- the inadequacy of the insignificant service and permit this humoled slave of the wire to inform him that the never-to-be-suni-ciently-censured line is busy i , " Under such circumstances it would be quite a pleasure to ring up "Central" ; at present it is sometimes more of a pain than a pleasure.

Gratifying to observe that the City Council has decided to adopt stringent! by-laws governing the conduct of people who frequent the beaches under the Council's jurisdiction. Not before it was time, either. We have in the past often drawn attention to the necessity of something being done in this direction. The hoodlum element is altogether too prevalent on the beaches. But apart from these, there are many young fellows who couldn't be classed as hoodlum in the ordinary sense of the word, but who seem to lose all sense of propriety and decency as soon as they get on to a beach. These are matters that require to be dealt with firmly, and the sooner an example is made of some of the principal offenders, the better it will be forall the community.

iiovvled his last bowl, James Ediniston, one 01 our best-Known bowieis unu ori> oi our iuosti esteemed citizens. The late iur Jiuuustou was born at ji'aisiey in ana staruea ma bowling career in wiao town at tender age ±iis orowier is at tne present time a noted player in Uiasgow. Mr iiidmiston nimseit arrived nere in October, iboo. Alter experiencing most or tne ups and downs inseparable from early settlement, lie was a bonded warehouseman and manager for over thirty-five years, and was well-known in commercial circles. About thirty years ago he made an effort to start a bowling green, but the prospect fell through no fault of his own. Some eighteen years ago, he was one of the promoters of the Ponsonby Bowling Ulub. He became president in 1898, and he was the first to introduce in the Province of Auckland the throwing of the jack by a lady across the green at the opening of the season. Mr Edmiston was treasurer of the Ponsontby Club, and up to the time of his death he was secretary of the St. Andrew Society.

So "Labby" has given up the ghost. " Labby," it is hardly necessary to remark, is the slang or abbreviated form of Henry Labochere. Henry's comparatively remote ancestors were refugees at the time of the great French Revolution of 1789, and the odds are that if Henry's great-grand-parents hadn't scooted from la belle France, when Marat, Robespierre and Co. were in power, there would have been no Henry, for his ancestors^ —who,unlike Henry, were Conservatives and Royalists— would undoubtedly have been deprived of their heads per medium of the same guillotine that robbed Louis XIV. of his headpiece. Labouchere was the proprietor of London "Truth," and the hero of a hundred libel actions, in a land where the libel law is not as strict as it is in New Zealand. He was also an M.P. for many years, but it is as a fearless journalist that his memory* will be perpetuated.

Yarns about Labouchere are many, but perhaps the best is in connection with a safe at " Truth " office which resolutely refused to be opened. Labouchere telephoned to a

safe-maker, asking that a man be sent at once to remedy matters. Tttis expert duly arrived with Hie kit oi tools, examined the lock, and tnen the .key, took out a bit of wire, and began to excavate a mass- or crumbs, dust and nuif. Tnen he inserted tlie key m tlie lock, turned the implement and opened tne door. -LiaOouchere, lor wliat was probably tne nrst and last time in nis life, blushed. " Wnat's your charge V" lie asKed. "±ive guineas," replied the expert. ''Does anybody except the manager know you are herer 1 " asked .Labouchere. "No," answered the expert. "Well," said Labouchere, writing out a cheque, " here are six guineas. I'll give you a guinea extra if you promise not to tell anybody the price I've paid to have a man dig dust out of a key for me."

.Extraordinary epitaphs are plentiiiu enougii m some or tne oiaer eimrchyaras at jaome, but one does not oiten striKe tnem Here, 'i'nere lias, iiowever, t>een on view recently iv a local stonemasons yard, a tombstone for tie grave of a woman who was killed by a falling tree. It bears tiie toliiowing quaint legend :— "Seeing my John in danger, To save him I ran at all hazard ; The tree fell, split my head. This was my reward." Some people's sense of humour seems to have a decided kink in it.

In reply to Mayor Parr's protest against the auxiliary mental hospital being dumped down on Point Chevalier, the Hon. D.Buddo said " the main point was that no delay must take place in making provision for patients. ,. This is distinctly funny, in view of the fact that for years past the Government have shown a callous indifference to the comfort of the mentally afflicted. Time after time, Mr F. G. Ewington, one of the official visitors, drew attention to the disgracefully overcrowded condition of the present main building, but absolutely nothing was done to remedy a condition of affairs that was as scandalous as it was intolerable. Then why all this desperate hurry all of a sudden ? The Government must be getting scared.