CULINARY CURIOSITIES

Observer, Volume XXIX, Issue 41, 26 June 1909, Page 3

CULINARY CURIOSITIES

An Example or Tec.nical Humour

THE talent for organisation that is possessed by the omnipotent and omniscient George George is something for ordinary every-day mortals to marvel at as a general rule. If report speaks truly, however, that talent was temporarily in abeyance on a recent occasion. On June 5 the practical examination in connection with the City and Guilds cookery classes was held at the Newton technical cookery school, over which institution the great and only George George wields his beneficent sway. It may be assumed, therefore, that the responsibility for the arrangements made on that occasion rests with George George. Far be it from us, of course, to suggest that G.G. soiled bis fair hands by personally shifting chairs and tables, and by indulging in any such menial tasks. But since George George is the head of the Technical School, it is to him that an explanation must be looked for should any defect in oonnection with that institution become apparent, and it certainly seems that on the occasion of the recent cookery examinations some of the arrangements were decidedly defective.

The fair devotees of the culinary art who desired to present themselves for examination in the mysteries appertaining thereto were divided into two batches. The first batch was summoned to attend before the tribunal from 10 to 1 ; while the second lot was called upon from 2 to 5. (In passing, it may be mentioned that the examiners consisted of Mrs George George and two other ladies) . The second batch duly made its appearance before the dread portals at two o'clock, ac instructed. Instead of being admitted, however, these candidates received a mysterioiis order to wait in the porch for a Little while We don't know what constitutes "a little while" in the estimation of a technical instructor, but we do know that it was nearly three o'clock before the candidates were admitted. They also noticed, to their surprise, that the members of the first batch came out m great excitement — some crying, some indignant, some disgusted, and one and all expressing and sympathy for the second batch. Undeterred by this, however, the second batch marched boldly in, to seek conquests in culinary creation.

On entering the inquisitorial chamber, a weird scene met their gaze. The first batch having just washed up their culinary apparatus, the sinks were greasy, and the floor was wet and slippery. It is on record that one fail- candidate sat down suddenly and unintentionally on the floor, and ruined her snow-white cookery costume. It is further alleged that there were only two stoves and a fire for the use of eighteen candidates ; that there was no arrangement for securing a given temperature m either of the stoves ; and that the table-room allowed to each candidate for the purpose of preparing her particular dish was only about a foot square ; that owing to the changing temperature, windows had constantly to be opened, with the result that the draught created frequently blew out the gas at the stoves ; and there were various other minor alleged grievances. By no stretch ot imagination could such a state ot affafrs, if it existed, be conducive to good cookery.

As it was, chaos is said to have reigned supreme. Owing to the scarcity of stoves, each stove was surrounded by a jostling swarm ot candidates, each one attempting to manipulate her own special dish — some trying to simmer the seductive stew, others struggling to roast the. national dish of Old England, yet another lot was wrestling with patrician pastry ; each trying to regulate the gas to suit her own particular dish, and each altering it when opportunity offered. Owing to ,the limited table-room, mistake^ and general oonfueion were the order of the day. Different .dishes became "inextricably mixed up, with the natural result that more than one fair

candidate is said to have been reduced to the verge of hysteria. Furthermore, through the delay in commencing the proceedings, the alleged examination, instead of concluding at five o'clock, as originally arranged, was not brought to an end until six, consequently for the last hour darkness reigned, and, to make matters worse, no lights were provided over the stoves. Taking everything into consideration, it is not to be wondered at that the candidates were convinced tkat the examination was farcical, and that if anybody passed, it would be through sheer hick. Nor it is surprising that Miss Lawson, the cookery instructress, was reduced to tears of despair, and was confined to her bed for some time afterwards.

"We have related the facts, in the main, as they were given to us hy someone who is in a position to become conversant with them. We therefore- see no reason to doubt their aiythen,ticity. If there is another side to the story, we shall be pleased to hear it. But if the statement made to us cannot be refuted, it remains as an obvious deduction that the so-called examinaation of the City and Guilds oookery classes was of but negative value. A recurrence of a similar condition of affairs should be guarded against. Mr George George is known to be a gentleman whom a beneficent Providence has endowed with an abnormal stock of nearly superhuman energy. Some of that energy he might well apply to dealing wun this matter.