BRIEF MENTION

Observer, Volume 7, Issue 345, 18 July 1885, Page 11

BRIEF MENTION

Full particulars relating to the Observer and Free LAtfCE Art Union will be found in this issue. * Wanted, a circular man for a saw-mill. Vide the dailies. Probably a good all-rotmd man is required. 4 I&ugh ©n rats ' is the fashionable medium in Wellington just now for ensuring a passage to the Golden Shore. The Auckland registry offices are said to stink in the nostrils of English servant girls. They say there are more fees than places. We have to acknowledge receipt of copy of this month's ' Bradshaw's Guide to New Zealand,' issued in Wellington, from the agent here' Mr A. D. Bennett. Gerald Massey who arrives here on Tuesday by the mail steamer, is said to be a fine speaker. He lectures on all sorts of subjects including spiritualism, in which he is a firm believer. Eumour speaks of an elopement in the 'hupper suckles.' The young lady has^ a couple of big brothers, so we shall not give particulars or names, only there is a sultry time ahead for the bridegroom. A correspondent of the Wellington Post isfunny^at the expense of the Government. He writes : Why are the present Ministers like bananas? Do you give it up? Because they have thick skins and no back bone. It is said that the more trifling the fire the longer, and louder ring out the bells. We outfnUo be in a position to judge. We have had fires enough In Auckland lately to set us up as experts on all branches of the subject. Mr Jas. A. Shepherd would appear to have ' struck ile ' on Ms property at TTpokorau, Bay of Islands. He says he feels sure that he has trot upon the track of an extensive goldfield! This is the sort of local industry we want. Sala's nose has furnished food for scores of pars. It has been a godsend to the Australian and American newspaper men. One fellow says it lights up well by gaslight, and another describes it as ' Bardolphian. Suck are the penalties exacted from eminence. According to a Canterbury paper, a gentleman, once a shining light in Christchurch society, and who was supposed to have died some years ago, and so put an end to a rather unpleasant financial embarrassment has come to life ouce more, having turned up in Auckland.. Who can it be? A Wellington man, writing to the Post on the bin maid question, says :— 'lt is well known that diabolical practices are carried on in our drinking saloons. It is not to be ■wondered at, then, that these young women turn out badly.' Wellington must, we fear, be a very immoral city. The following very interesting item appears in the wanted column of the Woodville Examiner :—' Wanted, a wife ; must be good looking. Apply in person to Sowiy Bros., bakers, butchers, and general fruiterers.' This is plain and straightforward as far as it goes, but surely the Sowry Bros, do not propose to have one wife between them ? If we were to borrow money from Jones to the tune of £155, and Jones wanted security. Then suppose we went and got mo re goods on tick to the figure of £230— then gave Jones a Bill of Sale for £155 on the goods, and then became bankrupt, what would you call it ? So should we. At the Christchurch Supreme Court, the other day, a juryman pleaded exemption on the ground that he was training dogs for the Waterloo Cup. Mr Justice Johnston thought the interests of justice were more important than the Cup, and refused to let the trainer off. Brown met Smith on the Devonport steamer the other day. He was looking very seedy, and explaned that it was his birthday, and that he had been drinking his own health. ' Seems to me,' said Smith , looking critically at his friend, ' that you j have beeu having too many birthdays lately old man.' A Waikato minister, who was asked how he managed to preach a fresh sermon every Sunday, year by year, and always find something new to say, replied that it was a mere matter of habit. /His sermons never kept him awake five minutes. 'Ah!' said his interrogator, 'That is the reason they so seldom keep other people awake, I suppose ?' Tb^ pair of larrikins who met with such a warm reception at the hands of the stranger whom they attacked outside the Clarendon Hotel on "Saturday night will probably remember in future that appearances are often deceitful. The scientific way in which the unknown floored both his assailants astonished all beholders. * A good story is related of Justice Johnston. In summing up one day at Tiraaru he made use of the phrase cvi bono ? A junior reporter for the long defunct Timaru Telephone, failing to catch his Honor's words, reported him to have said that he would put the kij-bosh on the case ! The Judge's feelings on reading the report of that case may be better imagined than described I Hannaford says his matrimonial agency has been the means of bringing 115 'happy pairs ' >

together. He thinks this entitles him to 'substantial recognition' from Government. It would be interesting to learn Mr lianuaford's modus operandi. Does he, for instance, personally superintend the courtships, and say ' bless ye, my children ' after the popping of the question V The D.irgaville Gazette recommends stopping the ' talking and printing machines, 1 saving £100,000 — equivalent to interest on 2£. millions; adjourning Parliament for two years ; leaving administration to a 'Council of Ten,' to be chosen from experienced men — patriots — known as capable men for wet and dry nursing of estates in minors' and widows 1 behalf. Simple, isn't it ? Who are the ten ? We want to know. 'What's in a name ?' Well, a good deal, the ' divine Williams ' notwithstandingHad any ordinary newspaper man scribbled the letters now appearing descriptive of the adventures of the great G.A.S. in ' The Land of the Golden Eleece,' five people out of six would, in all probability, have passed them by, but being Sala's, every one reads them— rushes for them — laughs at them, admires them, and says, ' .By Jove ! what a clever fellow that Sala is.' Wellisgton expects to be en fete during the Exhibition season. Cheap fares to the Empire City covering railway and steamer charges are to be the order of the day, and a large influx of visitors is confidently looked for. Several big shows are already en route for the windy centre, intent on making hay while the sun shines. Within the Exhibition building electricity will throw a light on the subject, and the great show is expected to present a festive appearance by day and by night. The only drop of bitter in the cup of the visitors' will be that no drinks are to be served within the building. In condemning the proposed increased duty on tea, a correspondent of the Dunedin Star writes that to tax tea any more now -would be a mistake, * aa it should be the policy of a far-seeing Government to encourage the consumption of non-injurious beverages, and to remove the temptation of alcoholic drinks, which are almost universally considered by most erudite physiologists as dangerous to the human physique. 1 Not a few of ' the most erudite physiologists ' consider tea as 'injurious to the human physique.' A correspondent sends us some ' old saws with new handles.' They run : — One good turn is as much as you can expect from a cheap silk. What the eye doesn't see is generally the parting of the back hair ; but even that is to be viewed by the aid of a couple of mirrors. When wine is in, as a rule, the wine merchant's bill is not long in coming in too. Never say ' dye,' whatever may be the fashionable color for hair. A cat may look the picture of innocence ; but for all that you will be wise not to leave it alone with, a canary. A nod is as good as a bid with most auctioneers. ' Some folks iz always reddy tew drink with you,' says Josh Billings ; ' but when you iz reddy tew drink with them they ain't dry.' This reminds us of a man who met a friend in Queen-street the other day and was invited by him to have a drink. The motion was carried without a dissentient voice, aud the pair adjourned to a pub. Here the drinks were called for and duly consumed. A moment afterwards, the man who had volunteered to shout caught sight of an acquaintance on the opposite side of the way (or said he did) ; and with an ' Excuse-me half-a-inonient' rushed across the street. He didn't come back, and the other fellow had to pay the piper. The drink question still agitates the minds of the Dunedin people. A Mr Rankin, addressing an audience in the Southern capital the other night on prohibition, said that if introduced it would diminish the number of hospital patients from 200 to ten within a , couple of years, that the number of inmates of the Benevolent Institution and Industrial School would be decreased likewise, and that they would not need the services of a Judge of the Supreme Court. Here a sceptic remarked that at present the Judge was not occupied iv criminal business for much more than a mouth in the year. Mr Rankin that with prohibition one judge would do for the whole of New Zealand.' We shouldn't care to be that judge, anyway. We have received a prospectus of the Auckland and North Shore Steam Ferry Company (Limited), capital £20,000, in shares of £1 each. The new company possesses, we perceive, an influential Directorate, and is likely to be a decided success. The company propose to build two steamers as a start, capable of accommodating from 1000 to 1500 passengers. The boats will be con- ! sttucted on the latest American principle, ' and are expected to do the distance between the city and the North Shore in seven minutes. There is to be a fifteen minutes' service, and as soon as practicable, the operations of the company will be extended to-Northcote. All things considered, this looks like business. The Criminal Sessions, ended on Monday last, were remarkable for the comparative lightness of the offences charged. There were, however, two cases of a kind which ought to be put down with a strong hand. We mean the cases of indecent assault. In both the cases heard last week the evidence of guilt was conclusive, but we think most people will agree that the sentences of the Court were unduly lenient. The. latitude given by the law to a judge in imposing

punishment is given, we take it, that he may use a wide discretion. Two elements ought to enter into his exercise of that discretion. One the actual criminality of the offendez-s, all the circumstances considered ; the other, the effect upon society likely to be produced by his leniency or severity. In the cases just tried it may be that no very terrible wrong was actually done. The act of indecency may not have been an extreme one, but, nevertheless, we think in the interests of public safety and morality a more severe sentence than two months with the option of a fine in one case, or three months in the other, ought to have been imposed.