THE COUNTRY

Observer, Volume 7, Issue 161, 13 October 1883, Page 12

THE COUNTRY

Mattngakabamea. — Is H. courting the lady for himself, or to secure her daughters for his two lads? AvotfDALE. — Was it Miss H. that attracted P. to OS. ? What a charming site, W. No wonder Mary has named the day. Te Robe. — Constable A. has bought the ritag. Polly swears she is engaged Has the young A.C. completed his milking lessons? Frank says waltzing with Miss C. is heavenly. Get him to tell you what he did with the baby's booties ? Waiweba. — Tom has again discarded the bit of blue George only wants to add a monkey to his accordian in order to travel W. was Bhocked the other night when Maggie told him about the diamond ring. • Otahuhit. — Why is that swain afraid to escort Mary Jane past the monument? Mick, you shouldn't relate dreams to ladies Don't entice eats about the ditches, Robina Rotten eggs in demand for the youthful carpenter. MakjIBTJKA. — Miss H. wants to know why J. S.s laundress doesn't get him up a boiled shirt? Why does D. borrow the butcher's horse when hacks are so plentiful? On (Lit, Miss EC. and the doughy are engaged. Panmube. — Why doesn't Mary C. pay for that ticket? On dit, that Nellie and R. will soon be spliced C. .is giving riding lessons, and has L. for a pupil What kept the storekeeper so late at the mountain ? Nellie, why didn't you get a ticket from Mick, instead of from a married man ? Te Abai. — Wanted to know, why Maggie ran away from Frank on the night of the dance ? What was T. and S. doing on the hillside? Spooning? When is Tom going to build the house P What did M. and J. go to Omaha forP! Whose hand were you squeezing that night, T. ? Oh, fie ! Why don't you kiss her ? HabeisvilliE. — The gum-trees are beginning to straighten their branches since Bob left, but Miss S. doesn't think they look so charming What attracts Charlie to the " corner " on Sundays singing "Susan's Sunday out?" Has "Old O." given "Our Bobby" any bread and jam lately?. What takes Sam to Pukekohe so often ? Is he on iuatrimonial thoughts intent ? Abatabtt. — What a long face Pontius has since, he had to give up knocking at the outside gate... ...Rather mean of the man who asked Lord L. to quash the ball, to go and buy tickets afterwards G. F. saya there is some strange work' going on. since M. commenced to go over the garden wall for the material to make his everlasting hasn with Some of our Blue Ribbonites have discarded their regimental colours, and can be seen occasionally in the enemy.'s. barracks. Waibangia. — School dance a big success — five, ladies: and twenty-five gents. Who were thecouplo that spooned outside under the window ?...... The young lady who collapsed on the gentleman's knee and fell asleep ought to choose another resting-place. And that young man who put both arms round his partner's neck when dancing. ought to know better. [Wairangia must be a sultry clime. — Ei>.] T.UBAKINA-.— -The Turakina Dancing Class had a breaking-up last week, after a really enjoyable night's dancing. H. A. and Maggie were there, Maggie was not able to carry off the palm of belle, she- was beaten by Miss E. 0 ;.H. L. and the laughing duck take evening walke up the valley. ....viWby do the mother and daughter walk down town every sale-day ? Is it to be seen or to see ? „..;vThe Elephant wasM.C, at last spre6, and a good one too. PxriCEiOHE. — Another black sheep has strayed from' th ? e 1.0. G.T. flock, but has been again received with open arms Another addition to the i(l6af)erß' corner ; a young baker has lately arrived from the Stanley-street baby farm. Gentle of hand and gentle of speech, Offering bis love to eaoh girl he meets, .Little he thinks hoflr they laugh at his pleaa ; "Decidedly old," says the "one " at the " trees." -Impatient at failure, he tries once again, Ne'er believing his efforts would still be in vain ; ".Gold should be a magnet " he says — " try ugaiu." Whangaboa. — At a recent funeral the cortege conm&ted.of fifteen boats. Johnny L. officiated as priest to perfection. It was very unfortunate^ however* that the grave was too short. At the usual hoar the "Lawyer" rang the bell, but there was no congregation, all- having gone across to the JJ.C, cemetery to pay their respects to the departed /.....Wilt old foxey raise his own wages with .the.;money he won at the raffle? P. D. canlt swallow. ■■ that hare...... The bald-headed niaglier threathens to introduce the Mercury Bay regime The ball at the Nest was a dedecided success, and.MißsD. was pronounced the belle. .Great credit-is due to the Maori promoter j ......The. .religious welfare of the employes at the new mill is being carefully looked after. A Wesleyaa Chapel is in.course ©f erection... ...The local pubTis doing a roaring biz.— fifteen fights in one day;..... H., g0t a black eye for dancing with &■ married woman... ...Where are the Good Templars? . . Tajtpo.— My few harmless notes from here, in one of .your recent issues, created quite a commotion, because I trod on the corns of some of our xjod-fisb.; aristocracy Why did that married woman christen her first-born Joseph instead of Wa^er. ?...,... The Auckland cook did not suit; knesrjtoo much. J. left Daisy in the blues The .GJgiloot has returned to Tarawera with his man ( Friday,..;.,Eseulapius is now doing all the doctpnog.' -.Amateurs left the professional undertake^ . and . grave-digger bankrupt No more complaints from Wairakei Jem about short nips. The <? C|ou,nt paid for his fence. No fencing with old'JacV ♦?• an 43> can't forget their old love at thje pub v .....80az says Banting is good MisßtL,is setting her cap at the man in blue. HAJ?iEii£-Is it love of high-class music, or the girlsj that takes C. to St. Mary's so often P A voic#>f*oW Taradale is very complimentary to ** Th*^<|tieen." It's no use, p. ; though you have an Ir^h -historical name, she prefers the British cheniiflfc.^Why did C. t of :the 0. Department,

avoid the introduction to E., and afterwards seek her out and have that little walk on the quiet ? Oh, you sly dog, Tom; what will the girl on Pumpkin Flat say ? Kaikora residents will be more careful in the future when they go in for tin-kettling. The reception they met with when their band serenaded G. P. and his bride will not be effaced from the memories of some of them for a very long time The Owhaoko shepherd will find his nose entirely out of joint by the time he nest visits the metropolis. There is nothing like being on the spot to succeed in love matters We had a costume rink here the other night — a howling success. Present seven gentlemen and four ladies Jimmy K. has gone to Wellington to get spliced Miss H. returned last Saturday from the South, and looks well, after hei- lengthened stay G. 8., who is here on Land Court business, is growing grey. Bob has cut him clean out with H The last banking representative returns to Auckland this week. He was kept too close to the grindstone for the ladies to see him Mrs Dr Potts has put us up to a lot of wrinkles. Cambbidg-e. — Ask Professor B. what he intends to do with those dark horses he is training in the Maori house That blue-blooded sergeant was in a towering passion when he found he had been shown up in the Observed. He terms it a " rag," yet with all his blue blood he is not above picking the crumbs which fall from the mess table The auburn-haired A.C. man emphatically denies having any tiling to do with the servant-girl ; he draws the line there The blue-blooded one, being unable to wreak his vengeance on the object of his wrath, seized an axe and chopped up the old box which had done duty as a seat outside the guard-tent, whereat an A.C. man was attacked with the divine ajlatus, and wrote : — I loved I loved and wha shall dare, To, chide me for loving That old box-chair, For many a pipe I have emptied there. The doctor has, however, come to the rescue, and the blue-blooded one Jaas been recommended rest and quiet The tailor's wife says her ulster was not tke cause of the fall, the footpath was all askew, but the surface man says it is quite correct. TattbanGA. — A party-goer the other night rode into the wrong paddock, and then couldn't find his way out. He went round and round the enclosure like a scared turkey for an hour or so, until a passer-by rescued him The Musical Union's concert on Tuesday evening was listened to by a fair and appreciative audience. The instrumental solos of Miss Buckland (violin) and Mr Snodgrass (flute)' were deservedly applauded. Mrs Esdaile sang in her usual finished style. Mr Vogan's songs were thoroughly appreciated. Mr Buckland also contributed material to the programme. Of the glees, orchestral selections, &c, it is only necessary to add that they were fully up to the standard which Mr Quinten has taught us to expect What is the reason Q.. did not pick up the bouquet that the young lady threw at him at the last concert ? Is he not a ladies' man? Who was it told the gentlemen to "shut up" when they encored at the concert ? Awfully rude Ada has a new set of teeth, and how sweetly she smiles Why didn't that lady have a little feeling for the piano, if she hadn't any for the singer? Joe Black has gone for his well-earned holiday. Cheer up, girls, Ye will soon be back Miss Allely has taken her departure for Auckland, amidst the well wishes of many friends Sane Me. and Miss A. take their worth out of the footpaths, but it's all the better for the boot trade The young ladiee hope Gerald will always shave, as it is so very becoming. Mohaka (H.B.) — Poor Charlie took his departure by the B.s.Bellaon Sunday. Such weepingand wailing ! But they gave him a cheer. Darling Agnes departed by the same boat ; the inkslinging was too much for her weak nerves Quite a cavalcade went to Waikare on Sunday. Poor Mac. was away on the bust. Naughty man ! What will Jane say at Pukekohe ? Little Mac. over the water was in his gflory. Little Delicate looked blooming. Mary dieDxne amiable beautifully. Old M. knocked bully Tom down the other day. What a lark !... ... Who broached the whiskey — eh? The ball in the telegraph office was a great success. Agnes looked charming, and was acknowledged the belle. Little Miss H was as attractive as ever in her Jesuitical ways, which are so nice. How she does tease poor Jack ! The Saturday Irving Club is not nearly so well attended since Bill left. Capital school for scandal. Hear all the news at it. No work done. Who stole the hat — eh ? That's the rub. Scribbling along the beach is now the fashion, but it won't wash somehow. As the writing is something awful to contemplate, the hand is very familiar Little Mac. is quite a "don" at cricket. Don't the dear girls admire his manly form ! What would Mary aay if another heart with love was beating ? She would cry " Peccavi." You've no chance, d«ar girl. Mac. isn't to be caught with cows-fluid, or. even chaff; are you, deary? Pity young H. shuts himself up in that rustic monastic retreat over the water Who shot -the shag? ■ The great Oliver Cromwell ! Bully for you in j leaving the district. Good job, the echo replies. "How doth the little busy bee" has returned, and is nibbling at the Provincial ; but old 8., the jolly old cuss, says "not for Joe." Gisbobne. — There is a young lady in Gisborne who was boasting that she had taken the ObSEBVEB for three years, and that her name had never been in print. I want you to give her a hit, please. She is rather a nice girl, but so distant ; she goes nowhere hardly. She was at the ball dressed in black satin, with white frosted flowers, and was considered the best dancer. She is from Auckland, so, please, give her a rub about the ball. She was dancing a great deal with Charlie J., a conceited young fop, but a good dancer also Ask H&rry why the bachelors gave him the cold shoulder ? What^aa come over Gill lately ? Is it the love caper P..n..Are B. and A. going to make a match of it P I would advise him to get one his own sine Those bachelors in Grey-street are a very noisy crowd, so Mies G. says...... The churchwarden stays out too late at 'night behind the bar That enterprising young timber merchant should be satisfied with one, as

he is called a fop by the other Kenneth K. does not like the Observer's reporter That tall bachelor should not wear spurs when he goes out riding on Sunday, because he might fall off... ...What is the matter between Bal. and Miss M., of Gladstone Road ? F., theyoung auctioneer, is awfully fond of twirling his moustache Johnny 0. says he is not going to have any more to do with barmaids Everybody knows when the lawyer is at home.; because he always has the puppy looking out of the window Poor A. R. looks forlorn since M.'s departure H. A., you naughty boy, to flirt with C. S. Delia is watching The timber merchant continues his evening strolls past that apple shop. Look out, the speeler has his eye on you By all appearances, the oil borer is more likely to strike oil at Allanach's than at the oil springs What was the matter with Miss H.s hair at the ball ? Did the curling fluid run out? Larry was very much cut up because Miss B. scratched his name off her programme and substituted that of the bootmaker That was a nasty jar for those four steel-bar drivers who thought themselves too good to mix with the slaveys, to get locked up in the gallery at the Seraphic Quadrille Assembly It was too bad of that young lady to remark that it would be impossible to lengthen Garry's mouth without shifting his ears back Who is that elderly lady that takes all stout gentlemen who walk down Bright-street for the Captain and calls out, " Is that you, Captain ?"