TAURANGA JOTTINGS.

Observer, Volume 4, Issue 99, 5 August 1882, Page 330

TAURANGA JOTTINGS.

— Mr Tucker's interpretation of the word lady, in responding to the toast of "The Ladies, God bless and multiply 'em," at the Kati Kati Football dinner, differed slightly from that generally accepted in r>olite circles. Surely the Kati Kati air, combined with the Kati Kati "tucker," has not such a deleterious effect on all young men's morals as was displayed in the melancholy instance in question. That it does exert a prejudicial effect is certain, for, after about twenty hours' inhalation of Kati Kati ozone, a party of footballers were so thoroughly demoralised that they came along the Cameron-road on Sunday afternoon, yelling and singing like Beelzebub's imps. Even the horses appeared to have caught the contagion ; they ran into an hotel and smashed the trap. — The Stanley Bruce has made tracks for Ashburton. There must hare been something wanting in that gentleman's nature; he didn't appreciate the beauties of Taurauga ! There was nothing in the North Island to touch Canterbury. While our ponderous commission agent was showing him around, it was nothing Itut " Cauterbnry beats you there," or "we do things better in Canterbury," etc. Presently they arrived at Te Banga, and "the infant" remarked, " Hundred and twenty Maoris buried here." " Oh, that's nothing. We do things better in Ashburton. Thousands there ; quite common occurrence," came glibly from the Southerner, , at which our exasperated and patriotic townsman thundered — " Then, why in Hadas (it mightn't have been Hades) don't you go hack." He went. — The concert in aid of the Institute funds, given on Friday evening, was fairly well attended. The first item on the programme — a very nicely played pianoforte duet, by the Misses Duncan and Clarke — was followed by " Snowflakes," which was not up to the high standard Miss Duncan has led us to expect. Mr Pagct's " Nil Despei'andum," with a view of the "Moriarity " accent diseernable here and there, but otherwise well sung, was of course vociferously applauded. Mr P.'s graceful retreat was quite a lesson in deportmeut. " Philomel," a pretty thing, prettily sang, did not elicit an encore. Mrs Daniel, for " Looking Back," received an encore, to which she responded with " ISTo, Sir." Her rendition of " No, Sir " was, in my opinion, much better than "Looking Back," in which her vocalisation was not good. Mr Cooke's "Shall I wasting in despair" received a recall ; they couldn't bear to see him waste. Of the choral selections, "The Village Chorister" and " The Gipsies Chorus " were my favourites; but they were really all so well rendered that it was difficult to choose. The choir certainly- reflects great credit on Mr Clendenning's conductorship. Another pianoforte duet, in which one of Mr Hood's pupils took part, opened the second portion of the entertainment. This was followed by a choral selection, and then Miss Fleetwood, with " We'd better bide a wee," fairly brought down the house. It was impossible to withstand so pronounced an ovation, so she returned and sang " The murmur of the shell " very sweetly. In " The Desert," Mr Clarke sorter gave one the impression that he'd gone astray to a tornado accompaniment. He wasn't hull' bad, though. Miss Fleetwood and Mrs Daniel next essayed to "Teach the Nightingale," but the audience didn't appreciate their joint efforts. Then Miss Duncan rose to the occasion with her ever popular " Esmeralda," for which she received a well deserved recall, and on her re-appear-ance, sang a sweetly pretty little French ditty. " The Gallants of England," by one of them, was of course loyally applauded, followed by the Choir with "At dawn aurora gaily breaks," brought the evening's entertainment to a conclusion. This concert served as Mr Slator's introduction to the Tam-anga pnblie, and his accompaniments, particularly that to Mr Clark in "The Desert," were highly appreciated. — Tauranga possesses a domain. It also possesses a Domain Board. The south end of the Domain is in a basin, with sloping sides and sloping bottom, the greater part of which is overgrown with a peculiarly glassy tussock, reaching to the knees, and as slippery as ice— or the Domain Board's conscience. This sloping expanse is agreeably diversified by holes from which sods have been dug, lumps left since the early military occupation, and other slight obstructions which serve to break the monotony of the scene and — the limbs of our athletes. The other end is alevel, albeit somewhat exposed hilltop, excellently suited to either cricket or football requirements, and which, with a moderate expenditure, might be converted into one of the finest cricket grounds in the province. The various athletic clubs at present use the southern end, but recently applied to the Domain Board for an exchange. They received the following reply, to which I have taken the liberty to add a few comments. It is divided into six parts, and begins thus : — Ist. The north portion of the Domain has been appropriated for other purposes. (The planting of one avenue of small trees.) 2nd. Trees have been planted, which are now too old to remove, as has been ascertained by consulting gardeners and others. (The Cricket Club offer either to remove these trees, aged 4yrs., to the northern end, or plant new ones;) 3rd If removed, a large expense would be incurred in replanting. (Saving clause to No. 2. The clubs offered to boar this expense, and also to properly lay down and prepare the northern end.) 4th On examining the ground, the Board do not see any very great superiority in the north end over the south for athletic purposes. (Fancy the Domain Trustees playing a game of football over the ground, in order to test its fitness for athletic .purposes !) sth. The athletic clubs had the opportunity to secure the north end before trees were planted, but they preferred the south end. (There's your true conservative. Once in a hole you must remain there. At the time the clubs " preferred " the south end, the north was occupied by a rank and luxuriant growth of emigrants' cottages, etc., built by Government, but which have since been removed.) And now for this final and awful anathema which is calculated to blast the hopes, and once and forever crush the rising aspirations of our presumptuous athletes for a share in the people's heritage, and a voice in its management. Listen! ye men of muscle. 6th. There is no probability that cricket and other athletic games will be played in. the Domain fer many years, as it will, no doubt, be before long all required as a park for tho inhabitants. Frightful ! Terrific ! It comes upon one with all the force of a Missouri tornado ; all the majestic and suffocating power of a Sahara sand storm ; all the persuasive eloquence of a hundred ton gun ; coupled with all the sweet simplicity and admirable discord of a donkey's bray ! But taihoa, does the particular mention made of "athletic games" indicate that the august octogenarians who constitute the Board may require the ground for the amorous and oscillatory " kiss-in-the-ring," the mild exertions of "puss-in-the-corner," or the Saltatory exercise of " baby's linen," and " hop-scotch."