BRIEF MENTION

Observer, Volume 3, Issue 60, 5 November 1881, Page 124

BRIEF MENTION

Drunk as a fiddler— Bosh ! The evidence in the Wade cases has been wciahtcd in the balance, and found wanting. , , The viilage of Parihaka is partly surrounded John Abbott laid the foundation-stone of the new Opera House on Saturday last. The Front :— The cheek of some of the young men Avho put on so much side. The timber ring were hard nt work last week to get the prices raised, and they succeeded too. "The Corrupt Practices Bill "—Wilham Dawson. Which cIaAVS ? At the beginning of October the Parihaka natives had plenty of food. Ncav song for Mr Bradshsnv— " Oh, Avhere, and oh, where has my poodle dog gone ?" . A " dark horse " will run Sir Maurice O Korke for Manukau. „_._ .-, „ The chorus of the Choral Society for Messiah will number 200 this year. The next concert by the orchestra, of the Choral Society will take place on Novemberl7th. Not Ion"- :igo the Board ot Education set its face against? the female teachers mating, and now they won't allow matting. „ The Young Men's Institute, established a short time a«-o by Miss Laura Smith, is a failure, and it has been decided to close the establishment. Seven Akaroa- youths Avho threw pepper on a ballroom floor got pepper from the Bench in tines and Nothing like going in " big licks." Bromflcld, a lawyer, is going to extinguish the Tauranga buster with a capital of £200, one-eighth to be called up. Several pounds of capital "IV Avere used m reporting Vesey SteAvart's Tauranga speech in his OAvn literary trumpet. Sykes (Walter, not Bill) has been actively engaged in the ivory trade at Opotiki. Bless their o*m_i_ j The latest Avondcr : Father Abraham " considered it unnecessary to make an oratorical effort " at thejoiuik meeting. Fact. ,/^Thc father of the Hon. John Bryce Avas a caipenter in Wairarapa, and obtained a local notoriety froiuj'is fondness for colonial beer. "Mother Carey's Chickens" is the nenv soubriquet of the ladies of the " Pirates." Has this any reference to golden eggs ? The Avay to remedy the defective acoustic properties of the Court-house is to connect the Avitnessbox, reporters box, the bar, and the bench by telephone. French tigue and jolly miller don't go cloavu at St. James' socials. Nothing like good honest healthy dance-hugging in spite of a puritanical priesthood. Prescription for foul mouth and Avhite liver by a pot-house Free L(ie)ance. Sillycur, fuss-I'or-us, ad lib — (Silica and phosphorus.) " Constant Reader," who wrote a note to us in pencil on Wednesday, is informed that anyone may participate. Mr Farnall, seeing that bis candidature for Rodney Avas likely to damage the Liberal cause, intends to stand for Waitemata. Mrs Partington thinks the teachers are quite right in excluding the children from school because of that dreadful concertina. She considers it vrorse than the hurdy-gurdy nuisance. A church Avar den, avlio Avas discovered by a member of the choir in a certain hotel in Hobson-street after morning service last Sunday, remarked : " I always thirst after righteousness." Witness : "He Avas oif his pony." Coroner : " What '(" Witness : " He'd lost his tommy." Coroner : "Eh ?" Witness : " The straight tip is he's off his chump," Miss Flora Anstead, and old Auckland favourite, was recently playing in Shakespearian characters at the Royal, Melbourne. Miss Jessie Raymond also appeared as Mdlle. Bonpleure in "Narcisse" at the Opera House. Those little vulgar boys Avho recklessly SAveep simoons of dust on public footpaths up to nine o'clock in the morning, should remember that, according to Solomon there is a time for everything. A correspondent suggests that iioav the Museum is to be opened on Sundays a petition should be got up to have church service held at (5 o'clock in tbe morning, so as not to interfere Avith the amusements of the day. NeAv subject for the Wesleyan poet of Ponsonby— Ah, the people, the people, That hate that little steeple. Dr Hooper is of opinion that the serious illness from Avhich the fascinating AvidoAV at Ponsonby has been suffering for some weeks past Avill turn out to be one more rather than tumour (two more). "Your firm friend, A. E. C." can have her letter, with the multifarious kisses to boot, by calling at this office. We are sorry that the young lady feels lonesome. Read an Observer or tNvo. Mr William Langton, Coromandel. Thank you for nothing. We don't publish deadhead announcements of the kind mentioned. You have as much notion of wit as an elephant has of dancing a hornpipe. About 50 tickets in Abbott's big SAveep Avore held in the Star Office, and they all turned out blanks. The comps are now swearing off lotteries and art unions, and intend to conserve their funds for the future. Rumour has it that the Rers. Runciman and Macnicol aro contemplating either a temporary or permanent exchange of pulpits, and that the latter gentleman is about to take up his residence in Ponsonby. Carey had to pay £500 for the right to produce the "Pirates," and he pays £60 a week to four leading members of his company. Riccardi wanted £20 a week for a six months' engagement, and a quarter of the salary in advance. A correspondent expresses a 3iope that the result of the Parihaka trouble will be to render New Plymouth habitable by Christians, and not, as hitherto, a rendezvous for gamblers, card-sharpers, mails, and commissariat expenditure. # > Cheek and mouth disease will break out in this city very soon, owing to the large amount of kissing which has taken place during the last few days, consequent upon the departure of the volunteers to the front. We learn that dire vengeance Avill be taken upon the writer of the par re Mr S.s marriage which appeared in our columns last week. The poor scribbler had better take warning, and make himself non est for a I short time. Superintendent Thomson's many friends and I well-wishers were glad to see him about again on Tuesday. He was present at the monthly inspection, and he will be able to resume his duties in about six weeks time. The Philharmonic Society's next concert avill be rendered exceptionally interesting by the performance of a chorus specially composed by one of Professor Caillau's pupils. It is said to be a very meritorious effort. It may not be generally knoAvn that Mrs Revitt, the vocalist, is the daughter of a Freemason of the Jubilee Lodge, created by the late Duke of Suffolk. Mr Revitt was a distinguished officer in the Navy, and was on board the Victory when Lord Nelson was shot. The Spring Exhibition by the Auckland Horticultural Society, of pot-plants,' cut flowers, fruit, vegetabables, etc., will take place on Wednesday and Thursday, Nov. 16th and 17th, in the Choral Hall. Entries will be received up to the 14th inst. The other day one of Mr Mackay's friends accosted him in the street, and complained that the Maori words in Mr Mackay's letter had not been translated into English. Mr Mackay said he was not aware of using any, other Maori word 3 except proper names. "Yes you did," said the man, pointing to the Latin sentence, "Hinc illoi lachrymal" (hence these tears). That man's education had been sadly neglected.

For once Aye can endorse the A-iews which Mr J, C. Firth expresses in his letters to our contemporaries on the subject of the West Const difficulty. Mr Firth, like many other great men, has grown wiser by experience, since the war of 1863. ' Faith in miraculous healing poAver is weak at Coromandel. The Mormons tried it on the foot of one of the lambs of the faithful Avith the result that a Gentile surgeon had to come to the rescue Avith amputation. Since then the parents and victims have backslided, and the Latter Day cusses have solemnly delivered them over to the evil one. The new North Shore Ferry Company are going to lose the patronage of the Saturday Afternoon Recreation Club in consequence of their refusal to concede the same terms as the old company made last season. If Tanner had shown a little more tact he might have avoided the difficulty. The folloAving marriages have taken place since our last:— C. H. Prince, Grey-street, to Mary Edwards, late of Wexford. Ireland ; Victor Lacroix to Marie Taylor ; Leicester Hair to Jane MattheAvs ; John Plunket Stodart to Rose Anna Cleghorn j and Frederick Prime to Mary Jane Hoyes. " Puck " Avires from Dunedin :— Pollard's business continued good with " Les Cloches de Corneville " up to its withdrawal. Some amateurs gave the " Hunchback "on Monday evening. With the exception of ono lady, none in the caste rose above the level of mediocrity. It is stated that the Turner-Montague Company open here this month— coming via Hobart. Herr Carl Sohmitt Avill take into rehearsal immediately Sullivan's opera, " The Contrabandista," which is to he performed in character at the Choral Hall with full scenic effects, dresses, and large orchestra. The caste is as follows :— Rita, Miss Fenton; Inez, Miss Mackay ; Vasquez, Mr Forth ; Mr Grigg, MrHarker; Jose, Mr Edmiston : Hancho, Mr Harker ; and the Captain, Mr Copeland. Most people are rather anxious to conceal the fact of having been summonsed for an overdue account, but Mr Payne, of Mount Eden Hall, appears to be rather proud of the circumstance, for he has pasted two summonses, together Avith the bill thereof, in his Avindow. Bravo, Payne ! After all there's nothing like letting one's neighbours know all about one's difficulties. They can tell then exactly how far to trust you. Dick Rhodes, the Tauranga mender of men's understandings, has escheAved politics, and retired into contented obscurity. Dick Avas addressing a public meeting the other day, and intending to be sarcastic, and to cast Avithering reflections on the manhood of his opponents, he used the unfortunate expression : " I only live Avith men." Mr Rhodes is a much married man. He Avas subjected to such unmerciful chaffing that he looked up a dictionary on the subject. He now says politics are not his forte. Ne sutor ultra crcpidam. Miss Potter, of the North Shore, contradicts the announcement of her engagement to Mr Kelly, and requests us to divulge the name of the sender of the information. We have looked up the copy, and find it duly authenticated Avith tho name and address of the communicant, Avho also for>varded tAvo other items which Avere correct. Under these circumstances we cannot give up the name, as the party may have been accidentally misled. It is only Avhen Aye feel convinced that a deliberate hoax has been intended that we take the extreme course of making senders responsible for their information. ■ — Mr John Mills, one of the most desorA-edly popular men in Auckland, Avas married on Wednesday last to Miss Annie Burtt, one of the belles of fashionable society. The marriage took place at St. John's College, the Rev Dr Kinder officiating. The marriage was quietly and unostentatiously arranged, and immediately afterwards the happy pair departed for the Waikato to spend the honeymoon. They will proceed to Christchurch in about a month. They have received a large number of wedding presents and congratulations from a verj- wide circle of friends, and Aye beg to add our own good Avishes for the happiness and prosperity of the young couple. The old " theological " question of " Who Avas Cain's wife?" has been exercising some of the giant intellects of this city, and the result of the endeavour to clear the mystery lias been to leave it in a greater muddle than ever. We Avould suggest the following as more momentous as Avell as more inviting subjects for " theological " debates : — Who Avas Adam's mother-in-laAV 'i How Avere the bridesmaids dressed at Eve's wedI ding P Was Abel a lunatic, and Cain his "keeper?" And if not, Whau not ? What Avas the age of Methuselah's billy-goat ? Was Lantech justified in killing a young man, or in marrying two wives ? And if so, which ? Was Noah the first (or last) preacher who got drunk ? Are Brown and the gorilla the only relics Aye have of pre- Adamite man. Since it has discarded the legal remedy for assault and battery, and appointed a fighting editor, we would suggest that the Christchurch society paper should take for its motto the folloAving lines from the " Jolly Beggars" : — "A fig for those by law protected, Liberty's a glorious feast, Courts for cowards Avere erected, Churches built to please the priest !" The Parnell "Burrow" Council is being inundated with letters complaining of bad smells.— Oh, Parnell, home of wealth and beauty, Retired officials, done with duty, HoAvever do your classic noses (So used to smell the scent of roses), Stand stinks the plebeians think a pest, Not those of Araby the blest, But more like those of Cologne fam'd, Which Coleridge counted o'er and nam'd ; And tell us, ye patrician SAvells, Whence is this love for loathsome smells ? The " spill" at the Drill-shed upon the arrival of the Volunteers on Saturday afternoon was most amusing. The wooden airproach to the shed was croAvded with men and boys, and at the entrance upon it of the express Avagon with the baggage so great was the pressure put upon the slender end-railing by the croAvd that it suddenly gave way, precipitating fully thirty persons on the ground beneath — a fall of about five or six feet. They piled up one on top of another into a very respectable eminence, but as the ground was soft they did themselves no injury. Nevertheless they presented a rather lugubrious apx^earance as they severally picked themselves up, their rueful countenances ancl sheepish looks contrasting Avith the mirth of the spectators. During the Aveek the " Pirates of Penzance " has drawn crowded houses to the Theatre, many people witnessing the performance four or five times. Both music and libretto grow upon one Avith familiarity, and seem less likely to tire than " Pinafore." On the whole the vocalists are well up to their work. Miss Murielle, of course, carries off the honours amongst the ladies, but Miss Leaf looks charming, and makes a good deal of a not very big part. Of the men, we like Mr Carey's Pirate King best, though he dresses the role somewhat terrifically. Mr Benham's Sergeant is very different to the conception originated by Mr Rutland Barrington, Avho went in for making the policeman a solemn ancl placid, though fearfully mysterious, individual. The former is, however, very amusing, and invariably secures an enthusiastic encore for " When the enterprising burglar's not a-burgling." Those Avho fail to visit the Theatre during the run of this opera Avill miss a treat. During a recent discussion on tlie British jury system an amusing anecdote was related by a sucking Blackstoue' A friend of his was one of the jury in a recent Supreme Court case. At the conclusion of the Judge's summing up, the foreman, with the concurrence of all but one of the jury, was about to return a verdict of " Guilty." Then the young man dissented, and the jury retired. The dissentient produced a formidable X>ile of notes of the evidence, and proceeded to leisurely inflict them upon his fellow jurors. Long before he had finished, however, a new light dawned upon their minds, and they acquitted the prisoner unanimously. Who will dare to say after this that our jury system is not the perfection of human justice ? Say Bill, tliis 'ere's a rummy go, Them swell coves gettin' shirty, They grumbles cos we're clean, yer know, An' like'ise when we're dirty. If we goes round the rocks, they say Our pussons we're exposin,' If in the baths at Freeman's Bay, Some swell cove pokes 'iB nose in, An' sez as 'ow we're larrikins, An' Avants the Press to maul us ; But if we go Avith dirty skins, ' The " great unwashed " they call us.