BRIEF MENTION

Observer, Volume 3, Issue 58, 22 October 1881, Page 92

BRIEF MENTION

— Tlie Hon. Randall Johnson is in Auckland. ""^Adam Porter says the auspicious event is really coming off shortly. —Miss Spry's solo at the Beresf ord-street sacred concert was Al. —Every one will be glad to hear that Superintendent Thomson is approaching convalescence. M r r.. j. Le Nauze has come back to Auckland, and takes Johnny Mills' place at the Customs. —Tea-fights and Good Templar concerts are coming into fashion. —Carey's Company have "Billy Taylor" m rehearsal. . . _ —There is a nice little feud raging m Onehunga anent an alleged case of bigamy. —Willie Hall, the fascinating young chemist from the Thames is now located in Auckland. -The Herald has been twice sold withm a fortnight with fictitious announcements of marriage. New name for the Irish Land League, (since the wholesale arrests)—" The Irish Land Lag." — The best " help" to institute the telephone. hemon-aid. . , Miss Alley's health has improved since she went to "Whangarei. — A certain snobess at a recent party was intensely annoyed because a married lady who had once been a shop-girl was one of the invited. — Te Whiti's latest speech reminds us of Foote s farrago of nonsense. There is no earthly use in the interpreters quarrelling over its meaning. It Las none. — There is another relative of royalty at Buckland's. Cleghorn's uncle is married to a sister of King Kalakaua. , „ . — Mr Compton, the respected chairman of the Harbour Board, has been laid up since last Friday with rheumatism. . . . — Disgraceful as it may appear, it is nevertheless a fact that a stand-up fight between two cricketers took place on the Domain Ground last Saturday. — The St. Andrew's Association is now in the state of coma which precedes dissolution. The debate on society journals has killed it. There has been a rush to book seats tor the "Pirates "on Monday. They appear likely to receive an immense reception. — A mother, whose knowledge ot orthography is limited, excused her son's absence from school in the following words :— " c as a sor I." . # Quite a. number of Thames celebrities were in town during the week. They included W. McCullough, A. Brodie, Bill Mahoney, and Jimmy Mcllhaney. — The Acclimatisation Society will be glad to hear that a full-grown "roe " has been frequently seen in Duke-street, Cambridge. —So the long - talked -of match between A. Eobb and Miss "Whyte, of Onehunga, is not to come off after all. The dispute between Mr King and the Tatetere Company has ended. He gets between 700 and 800 acres, the Naboch's vineyard. . — The State prosecution against the people s William was settled in the Supreme Court Library between the Attorney-General and Mr Cotter. — A lady writes from Cambridge : — Ido not know what we Cambridge people should do without our Observer." —According to the Karangahape-road gossips Johnny's baby is remarkably pretty, and like its father. , ■, , i — Littlewood was in great request last week and sang at six or seven different Sunday school and tipplers entertainments. —What the Patetere Company are now squabbling over is the division of liability for that £4000 which was advanced as "ground bait" on the several blocks. —What does this mean :— " Wanted three young girls to learn light business." Has it anything to do with candle-making ? Horse "duffing" is said to be unpleasantly common in some of the out districts for the purpose of receiving rewards. — The writer of the imaginary sketch on lhe Eruption of Eangitoto" was a true prophet. Tongariro is in eruption. — The people of Otahuhu district arc great breeders of geese ; but it is not true that they intend sending one to Parliament to represent them. — There is war to the knife in Onehunga over the piece of land which " Daddy " sold to the Hope of Manukau Lodge of Good Templars. — The telephone in use in New Zealand is not the American system, but an improvement on it designed by Dr Lemon. —Elliott's Philip Eaye in " Foiled," is a very fine representation, and much above the average of stage villains. — De Lias has squared matters with Wybert Eeeve, and we shall have "Diplomacy" over here shortly. — The Pomerov Company can't come to terms with De Lias, and it is probable they will have to play at the Choral Hall. — It is whispered that the irregularities of a certain leader of a religious body in this city are about to culminate in a legal separation from his spouse. — Mr Gr. A. Graham will be in Auckland about the end of the month to prepare for the opening of the new Masonic Hall. — Mr G-. M. Reed is meeting with much success in his canvass for the East Coast Land Company, and expects to proceed to England shortly on business connected with the proposed special settlement. — Our friends over in Sydney will not be pleased to hear that a smart New Zealander, who has just returned from N.S.W., is composing a poem called " The Land of the Lags." — The schoolmaster who went into Waters' Dining Eooms the other night rather late, and asked the waiter for " oysters neat," must have been very far gone. — Vincent, the deaf and dumb man committed for trial in Dunedin on two charges of forgery, victimised several people in Auckland some time ago by means of begging letters.| — There was great excitement in a certain township the other day when Mrs G. seized T. O. by his inexpressibles, and spanked him in broad daylight in view of a crowd of bystanders. — Jenkins, of Newmarket, "does" the Good Templar meetings in turn, patronising, on an average, two lodges a night, and delivering speeches at each. He'll prosper, that's certain. — Why do female compositors wink at young men in the streets ? (N.B. — This is not a prize conundrum, but an earnest and agonised enquiry by an unsophisticated "new chum.") — Tawhiao has Ms eye on a good billet, that of District Engineer for the Waikato, and has been getting his hand in by giving lessons to Mr "Wright in the construction of the Alexandra road. —-Pretty servant girl to butcher : " Can't you eet off your horse, and bring the meat to the door." Butcher boy : " Git hoff ? Lor* bless ye, no miss, he's a wild Harab steed, this nn." . .There are some nice little election scandals at Te Awainutu. The majority of the votes for one of the candidates are said to depend very much on the stoppage of a certain road, and other highway works. — On dit that the head quarters of the Native lands Court is to be removed from Auckland to Weilington, Judge Fonton being the only impediment which has hitherto stood in the way. — The congregation of a certain church in Onehunga are reported to be anxious to investigate the peculiar methods of the stewards in accounting for the jjullections. .' . . -r, „ -d—There was great excitement in irarne.ll Jtuse jbhs Other night. A small boy alarmed several residents

in the neighbourhood by reporting that a much-respected churchwarden and regular attendant had been touncl drowned in a ditch with an umbrella firmly gasped m his hand. On going to the scene they found the unfoitanate man, not dead, but drunk, and assisted him home. — What is this unsavoury scandal we hear in connection with a certain shining light of the Presbyterian Church, and a Sunday-school teacher, m a township not many miles from Auckland. When the dramatic critic of the Star says that Miss Jennie Watt-Tanner's voice "is a mirror -of every passion she wishes to pourtray," he must mean that she is a good-looking (g)lass. —A voune lady wishes to make it public that J. L., of Epsom, looked perfectly killing last Sunday morning in his new fawn-coloured rig-out which suits "—Lord John, of Waterfall, Thames, is wroth with the Observer for styling him a lawyer's, clerk, instead of -'law clerk." The distinction is as nice as that between a donkey and a jackass. —The controversialists, essayists, lecturers, and critics of female beauty who belong to at. Jomes'B Mutual Improvement Association have resolved to conclude the session with a social gathering similar to that of last year. . , The threatening letter writer who imagined that he could extract money from Dr Philson, must have been an exceedingly sanguine individual. Nothing less than an Armstrong battery would induce the doctor to part with five bob. . . — Says Truth of August 18th :— Mr Arthur Mills, late M.P. for Exeter, who has been on a visit to New Zealand during the last year, returned with his family, last week, to his Cornish residence near Budehaven, and was received with immense enthusiasm. — The much-talked-of discussion on Gompention to Publicans " is indefinitely postponed owing to the severe indisposition of the Rev Mr Edgar. The public, however, will consider itself fully compensated by being saved from another bore. A. W. writes: — "Kindly correct an error made iii last week's Observer relative to the approncliin<* nuptials of Mr B. Badger. Instead of Miss Martin, of Kyber Pass, it should have been Mr E. Badger and Miss Hawaii, both of Newton-road." —There will be weeping and wailing and <niashin°- of teeth in the female circles of St. Andrew's cono-reo-ation when it is known that Mr Smyth, so long an ornament to the Society of Mutual Achnirationists, is about to take his departure for Australia. — Miss Florence de Lorme.niece of the Bureau, will shortly play Ealph in the " Pinafore" and Germaine in the "Bells" with the Pollard Liliputian Company. We are glad to learn that this talented young lady is succeeding in her profession. — Little C. was much gratified at receiving a present of a " silver "-mounted stick; but he cannot understand why it should blacken his hands so when lie uses it. He has the continual appearance of being in the black-lead business. ■ — Scraps of conversation overheard in Queenstreet. Married man of respectable standing : " Yes, I think it would do her good." Shabby looking woman, in an Irish accent, " Sbnre me poor colleen is moighty fond of you, sir." What did it mean ? — At the meeting of journeymen regarding the Saturday half-holiday, one of the speakers exclaimed, "Blow this yer hidea o' beginning at ha'-pnst seven. By-and-bye, they'll want a man to sit up all night in order to get to work early enough." — The North Shore Regatta committee are about the best " beggars" we have seen yet. They only started going round about two weeks ago, and have already raised between 20 and 30 cups and any amount of money. — A correspondent writes "Great indignation is felt in our suburb at the conduct of an unnatural father who, at the instigation of his second wife, has driven his daughter from home. I mention no names, because I do not think it advisable, but perhaps if you will insert this note it may do some good." — Mr Thomson, of Messrs Spicer Bros., paper manufacturers, who has been staying in Auckland for the last few weeks, and excited much curiosity by his military appearance, left for the south per Te Anau. Report saith he is writing a book about New Zealand, which will be published on his return to England. — This is hona fide, and was picked up last Monday near the Post-office :— " Dear Tom,— The reason I didn't laugh at you when you laughed at me in church yesterday is because I have "a bile under my arm, and I can't laugh as I vised to, as heaven is my judge. Your loving Lizzie." — Charlie Stubbs, who lately visited California, says in a letter to a friend that he' found the Americans very sensitive on political subjects, and more than once narrowly escaped getting his head punched for expressing with too much freedom his opinions of their institutions. — Now that the warm weather is setting in, Inspector Goldie ought to devote some attention to unprincipled vendors of rotten fruit and unwholesome fish. Some of the sickness now prevailing in Newton is distinctly traceable to the abominable refuse sold by a fruiterer in Karangahape-road. — There is a burst up in the Auckland Freethought Society. This will be balm in Gilead to the orthodox. The Nothingarians and Anythingarians cannot reconcile their peculiar views, and the spiritualists are are at loggerheads with both. The library of naughty books has been broken up. — A correspondent to the daily Press has a complaint about " cast-off linen (both sexes)." It certainly does soem wrong to mix up the sexes in this way. Old linen, of either "sex," is out of place when used as but--ter-wraps. It is more appropriate in the "materialising" seances of the spirit-(w)rappers ! — The champion mean family in Auckland attend St. Matthew's. Attired in jewellery and fine linen they occupy a prominent seat in the sanctuary, but the plate passes them Sunday after Sunday without so much as the melodious jingle of a threepenny bit. Poor Mr Tebbs would soon get out of condition if all his parishioners did likewise. — The Auckland Dramatic Society cannot see that they have misapplied the funds raised for the distressed Hebrews. If the money didn't all go to the unfortunate Jews in Southern Eussia, it went to the relief of distressed Anglo-Israelites nearer home. The committee deserve a "spree" for their exertions.— Jew-de-spree I . —To the Editor : Sir,— A paragraph m your brief mention column of this week's paper states that the A.D.S. suffers annoyance from Mr Lionel Phillips, which is a mistake. It should have been Mr J. B. Phillips, tailor, Queen-street. Hoping you will correct it in your next, I am, etc., J. M. Sibbin, Hon. Sec. Auckland Dramatic Society, Auckland, October 14th. Charles Clayton, the surveyor, better known perhaps as " To Te Nni," has resigned his Government appointment, and proceeds at an early date to the laupo District, where he will put several large Native blocks through the mill. This amiable and energetic gentleman deserves every success in his new venture. —Mr Pardy, whose civility and courtesy are becoming proverbial, has earned the thanks of the hotelkeepers by giving them notice individually of the coming into operation of the new Licensing Act on Monday last, and pointing out the most important alterations relating to barmaids, billiard-rooms, &c. Offenders against the provisions of the Act will thus be deprived of the plea of ignorance. , . ... „ . , -. — 1 saintly looking man, who is distinguished for the rigidity of his views on the eternal fitness of things, went into a booksellers shop m Queen-street the other day, and mildly rebuked the proprietor for having placed a picture exhibited in the window on a big family Bible. The bookseller was equal to the occasion when he remarked, " I always looked upon the Bible as tne best basis for everything." _ ,„ i * i Having got the question settled ot who was the originator of the eight hours movement in New Zealand! some of the building trade m Auckland nre contending for the honour of introducing the Saturday half-holiday system (without compensation to the employer for the four hours' labour of which he will be deprived). This comes of the Legislature sanctioning local option principles. . . — When our contemporaries crib their " original " stories from American-papers they ought to be careful to alter the headings. For instance, in the Star's article on " Tricks of the Marriage Insurance Companies" there was the heading, " Debts and downfall of the Jersey Lily-, Mrs Langtry," and in the article her name was never once mentioned, and there was not a word about her debts and downfall.

— A well know citizen, suffering from sore throat, went into a chemist's shop in- Queen-street the other day to seek relief. " Can you gargle ?" inquired the disciple of Escnlapius. "No," replied the patient, "but I can pluy ninepins." This reminds us of the story of the clergyman, who mot a boy fishing on the Sabbath, and asked him, "Do you ever pray ?" "{Oh, yes," rejoined the intelligent youth, "I'm a regular dapster at cut-throat euchre." — It is high time that the G-overnment instituted some more efficient checks on the accounts of road boards. It has come to our knowledge that a flagrant piece of dishonest jobbery was perpetrated recently in a certain district in the Waikato. Duplicate vouchers were made for a contract, passed by the chairman of the board, and actually paid. The spoils of this unholy alliance were divided between the two swindlers. This is how the ratepayers' money goes. — During our absence last week an ill-natured paragraph about Mr George Quick which might be twisted into meaning something rather offensive, was slipped into the personal column. Mr Quick is too well known and respected for such a thing to do him any harm, but we regret the par should have appeared, and hope he will understand it was one of those unavoidable accidents which, despite any amount of care, will happen occasionally. — The poor man Leadbitter, to whose sad case we drew attention recently, left Auckland for London by sailing ship the other day. We understand he went in defiance of Dr Pbilson's wishes, as all necessary operations had been carried out here, and if he would have stayed on qnietly at the Hospital he might have recovered speedily. His longing was, however, overpowering to return to his wife and children. — A male teacher at a suburban school, not 50 miles from Auckland, was giving a.spelling lesson to his pupils one day last week, when he came to the word "excitement." and the following took place:— "Can any of you boys spell ' oxcoiteinent ' ?" "No, sir." "Well, excitement is oxcitement. Now, boys can ye's give me the mailing of the word oxcoitment ?" " No, sir." " Well, oxcoitement innnes confusion. Supposing for instance that two of you boys were to have a foight. Well, that would be oxcoitment, and therefore cause confusion." — A lady correspondent writes to us from the Thames complaining of the wicked behaviour of a socalled gentleman near Grahamstowii. She says, " Being a man of education, and holding a Government situation he ought to set an example as a respectable citizen. He is tall, has auburn hair and whiskers, andis the father of a family, but he is in the habit of haunting the byways of Parawai, and intercepting lonely females who happen to be out after dark, and he insulted a lady friend of mine a few evenings ago. Perhaps a hint through your columns may recall the fellow to his senses. — The practice of "Maritnna" by Mr Gordon Gooch's Opera Class commences on Wednesday next. Miss Sykes will probablytake the character of "the pretty Gitana," and so far as personal charms and vocal abilities are concerned she will sustain the part well. Mr Gooch may be trusted to supply the necessary histrionic training, and to see that the vocalization, shall be as effective as possible. It is not unlikely that Forth will be cast for Don Caesar, and Edmiston for the King I of Spain, while Mr Gooch in all probability will take the part of Don Jose. — On Thursday next, the 27th instant, an amateur dramatic performance will be given in the Chorul Hall, the proceeds being devoted to paying oil the debt on St. Thomas' schoolroom. Tor this very praiseworthy object a number of ladies nnd gentlemen have tendered their aid, and amongst them we observe the name of Mr Gordon Gooch, who makes his first appearance on any stnge in the celebrated musical drama, " Guy Mannering." — " Foiled," produced at the Theatre on Monday, and plnyed during the week, is a sensational melodrama of moderate merit, which relies mainly on its scenic effects for success. These were unusually good, and great credit is due to Mr Sefton who was the projector of most of the best sets. Mr Leake appeared as the good boy of the piece, Mr Elliott playing the villain with immense effect. This gentleman's make-up and acting were both admirable, and he was well backed by Miss Taiiiier and Mr Sefton, who went through the big sensation scenes in quite a life-like manner. " Foiled " has been drawing fair houses, and should be seen. While we do not wink at the faults of the detectives, we willingly award them whatever praise they deserve. We think they have shewn commendable promptitude and energy in breaking up the dens of infamy in the city, where so many girls of tender age have been decoyed to ruin. Apropos of this subject, our contemporaries did great injustice to the dstectives in publishing a statement that they were in the habit ot frequenting the brothels for immoral purposes. We are informed that no such allegation was made m Court, and that the morning paper simply copied into its columns a blunder from the police report m the Star. — "Puck" wires from Dunedin :— Pollards children have drawn an excellent downstairs attendance during the week in " Les Cloches de Corneville." On Saturday night money was refused. The acting of May Pollard as Serpolette and Herbert Sallinger as Gaspard is much praised and both are nightly recalled, but Oorne Osmond's voice is completaly broken, and the cast would be improved by his withdrawal. Pollard has " Girofle-Girofla" in rehearsal. Gillon, as Williamson's representative, has taken the Princess Theatre for them. They open here on Boxing Night in Struck Oil." and will bring over their own company. —Silly Billy has started Ins pranks in the "Taproom Twaddler," and claims kinship with one of our contributors on the strength of some ideas and phrases which Billy steals from the Observer, and imports into his wretched attemp to make— " Staggering prose to stand, And limp on stilts of rhyme around the land. No doubt " the brother of poor silly Billy, or other relative, or guardian will rejoice at the unfortunate youth disclosing his whereabouts, and take steps to put him under proper control. The "newsy man of the "Twaddler" is fond of recommending the Whau ; he has been there, evidently ! —It was quite superfluous for the members ot the Philharmonic Society, in their "complimentary address " to Professor Cailliau, to assure that gentleman that the sum of £11 10s, handed to him, was not the I measure of their regard for him. But has any one the ! hardihood to say that it was not the measure of the regard of the public for the critical little professor t His pupils are said to be about to express their regard for him in a " similarly substantial manner,' and a simple exercise in the rule of three will bring out the money value of this regard. The hundred odd ladies and gentlemen would be lightly taxed at half a soy. each, and may do the handsome after this hint. Nous verrons. The stereotyped phrase during the American war used to be, "The army will shortly resume the offensive." In New Zealand we are now being treated to a similar style of thing in connection with affairs on the West Coast. We are constantly being told that such and such preparations are being made for a march on Parihaka, just as if the object were to give Te Whiti ample time to get up a warm reception, or to ,run away to the bush. The attitude of the Government and Te Whiti is very like two worthies described in the follow- * " The Earl of Chatham, with sword drawn, Stood waiting for Sir Richard Strahan ; Sir Eichard, longing to be at him, Stood waiting for the Earl of Chatham. —A current riddle runs as follows :— " I never owned a horse, but had to pay for my own horse, which I had never bought." Mr Palmer, of Mahurangi, purchased a horse and left it with Mr Wngley to ride overland and placed the animal in his paddock at Bemuera. Subsequently it disappeared, and seems to have got into the possession of aMr Eodgers. Next it is sold at Mr Buckland's yards, and bought by Mr Lendrum for Mr Wrteley , but the latter denies having given any authorit j for the purchase. Nevertheless the Bench, though believing the horse to be the same as purchased by Mr Palmlr, and entrusted to Mr Wrigley's care, compels Mr Wrieley to pay for it. The climax will be reached if the horse be proved to have been stolen from someone else before the first sale to Mr Palmer. There was a frightful commotion at a house in Albert Park, the other day. The train of circumstances that led thereto were thuswise. The cook usually left the oven door open all night, but on this oci casion the mistress of the house on making a nocturnal I round of the kitchen, closed the door. The favourite Tabby of the family had from time immemorial been in the habit of utilising the oven as a sleeping apartment, and consequently the ill-starred foeline was shut in. Next morning a roaring fire was kindled, and, horror ! when the chef de cuisine proceeded to the oven to heat

the plates for tho matutinal repast, there were theroasted remains of poor pussy. The family have ah-eady fasted one w eek and even now cannot be prevailed upon to eat anything cooked in that oven. —There !is still some hope for the Auckland clergy 5 they are not all such black sheep as Bishop Co , wie a ai l d eS x? rs < . a S )bB aud Br ee. It was just the other Sabbath that the minister of St Luke's Presbyterian Church severely lectured the aristocratic Remuereans on the deadly vice of " half-hearing " ie , attending church only once instead of twice a-day This is the proper way to counteract the cry of certain depraved people for Sabbath relaxation— " The fear o' hell's a hangman's whip To hand the wretch in order." We fear, however, that the congregation of St. Luke's are half hearers " in another sense, as on account of the foreign accent and broken-winded utterance of the minister, only one-half of his remarks are heard intelligibly by the audience. — Some lunatic, or practical joker, sent a letter to Dr Philson, demanding a sum of £281, and threatening to try a few rough experiments in anatomyon the doctor and his two sons if he did not ante tip the money at once. The wily old doctor requested the messenger,, a small boy, to call for the money next day, and when he went a detective was watching his movements. A parcel, containing pieces of lead, to represent money, was given to the boy, who was followed by the debective, but eluded his vigilance by dodging round the houses and back yards. When the detective, after a smart chase, again came up with the youngster the parcel had disappeared, and in answer to inquiries the gamin said the man had gone through the cemetery. The detective (who can't be a very smart officer) is still looking for that man. — His Excellency the G-overnor has returned from Fj ji unexpectedly. People wonder why he went at such a critical time. He expected to be three months absent, and then to go to England. Having been specially directed to report on West Coast native affairs by the Imperial authorities, he could hardly be absent when the Government and Te Whiti seem mutually desirous of fomenting an insurrection. All that a portion of the Ministry wished was that ho would stay at Fiji for some time, in order that they could deal with Te Whiti as they desired. His arrival just after the declaration of war by the Acting Governor is one of the most curious episodes in our very curious history of responsible government. — Amongst the hotels which are coming to tho front nowadays may be mentioned the Bricklayers' Arms, in Chapel-street, which has been leased- by Mr John Gallagher for a term of years, and newly fitted with handsome furniture, bedding, etc., by Messrs. Chermside and Lino-bury. The peculiarity of this house is that it provides first-class accommodation for boarders nt the almost nominal rate of 20s. a-week, and, as Mr Gallagher was for many years in the employ of Mr Minetti, the table is of a very superior description. Now chums and others who wish to combine comfort with economy, and to live in a house where the beer and drinks are pure and unadulterated, cannot do better than give Mr John Gallagher's house a trial. Though the new host has only been in possession for a few weeks he is already wonderfully pop\ilar, and has collected a goodly number of respectable lodgers. The few vacancies will, in all probability, fill up rapidly. — A very j>leasing incident took place at the Exchange Hotel on Saturday evening, when a number of the friends of that popular young actor, Mr James O'Brien, assembled to present him with a congratulatory letter and a. valuable gold locket prior to.his departure for Melbourne. Mr O'Brien is well known in Auckland, and being as gentlemanly and unassuming off the stage as he is quiet and self-possessed on, has made many friends. They have noted with pleasure the energy ana pains he has shown in his profession and the steady improvement there has been in his acting, and it was felt that the • present would be a fitting opportunity to pay him some compliment. The locket was presented by Mr Jones, who made a suitable speech, which Mr O'Brien replied to cordially and unaffectedly. He left by the mail steamer for Sydney, and will open at the Princess', Melbourne, in " Betsy." —A "native difficulty" of an alarming kind has sprung up in Auckland. The Board of Governors of the College and Grammar School will offer no inducement towards the study of the Maori language, and there is imminent danger of the race of interpreters becoming extinct. Mr Fenton refrained from harrowing the feelings of the public by detailing the terrible list of evils which will accrue from this dire eventuality. Could not this gentleman induce the governors to establish a Maori "chair" in the "college," and get Te Whiti into it, thus settling at one stroke the native difficulty here and the one at Parihaka ? Following up the suggestions in the Star's article on technical education, the venerable savage might fill in his time by teaching a practical Fencing School, and also take the lectureship of the Modern Prophecy Class. Government would not grudge £1000 a-year towards the new professor's salary.