THAMES TITTLE TATTLE

Observer, Volume 3, Issue 54, 24 September 1881, Page 22

THAMES TITTLE TATTLE

— Miss Nicliol, of Onchunga, is at present on a visit to the Thames. Athol is thinking about putting up for drummajor of the Scottish Battalion when the next vacancy occurs. Go in and win, William. j\<l r Mathieson, of the Telegraph Department, left suddenly for Wellington last week, hnving received an urgent message to proceed thither ; and Miss Kate V. is quite sad and lonely. Some of our bank officials hare been making a good thing; out of Waihi stock lately. Two hundred per cent. oii large transactions in the course of a few weeks is not at all bad for young men. ■ — Several young ladies, who have fallen victims to the fascinating charms of Claude Brooke, A.A , are disconsolate at his not having- paid a second visit to the Thames, us promised some weeks ngo, and are very anxious to know what has become of him. Can you give them any information on the subject, Mr Editor ? — Billy Hall, the bashful young dispenser of ointment and pills, is about to leave the paternal roof to " twavel round, you know." Willy has been very popular duriuy the time he has been managing his father's Shortland business, and his departure for the neighbouring colonies will be regretted by many readers of the Observer. — That little affair, in which four gentlemen were mentioned in my last as about to be " hauled up " on a charge of larrikinism, has been hushed up, and the general public thereby deprived of n morconu of interesting tittle-tattle. The threatened cxpow has, I sun glad tosay, had a most salutary effect on the "frolicsome oysters," who now move about with a most penitent look. — A flag was flying from flic poppet head of the Hape Creek Mine last week, and it wsis generally believed that the demonstration was in honour of the marriage of a spruce young Methodist clergyman to tbo proprietor's ewe lamb— an event which has long been looked forward to with pleasure by the rev. gentleman's parishioners ; but unfortunately for those who take an interest in matters hymeneal, it was found on enquiry that the Union Jack had been hoisted to celebrate the cessation of hostilities-legal, of course, between Mr G. and his tributers. — At an entertainment held in Shortland the other evening, it was noticed by all present that the pastor of the church in which the gathering took place was suffused in smiles, and looked as happy as a king — a most unusual thing for him ; and the company, on cogitating on the subject, came to the conclusion that the change in the worthy parson was due to the fact that a noted female revivalist preacher (to whom, it is said, he is about to offer his hand and heart) was seated beside him on the platform. — One of the large mercantile firms in Auckland put the screw on a Grahamstown tradesman, who does a large general business, the other day, and attempted to burst him up ; but with the aid of a friendly bank manager he succeeded in freeing himself from their grasp, much to their astonishment, as they had been led to believe "Jack" would not survive their action. Our auburn-haired knight of the hammer now gets his goods from another merchant, and declines to pay siny attention whatever to the overtures inside to him by the firm which had served him so shabbily, and now wishes to resume business relations. — The worthy incumbent of St. George's (the Rev. V. Lush), is likely to leave us shortly, and general regret is expressed by the congregation in consequence. With all his faults — and who is there amongst us who has not some — Mr Lush has proved himself a good pastor, and I doubt whether (if be goes from amongst us) we shall be as satisfied with his successor as we are with the present occupant of the living. I certainly think it would be unwise for his parishonors to allow him to go without a struggle, and I would suggest to them that when the time arrives for considering the proposed change, they should make an effort to retain his services for a further period. — The champion mean woman is at her old tricks again. A few days ago she entered a confectioner's shop in Shortland. and expressed a wish to purchase some sweetmeats for her children, who accompanied her. The polite shopman, believing that a good order was " sticking out," handed the lady samples of at least seven or eight different kinds of lollies, till of which were tasted by her and her offspring. At lust, the Duchess decided on what kind she would take, and. with the air of one who had conferred a great favour on a fellowcreature, requested the " man of sugar" to weigh her out three pennyworth ! The feelings of that shopman as he supplied the order can be better imagined than described. This incident is true, and can be vouched for. — Grahamstown presented quite an animated appearance on Friday last, caused by the arrival of the Hampson Temperance Brigade from Auckland. Daring my time I have made one at several excursions, but I can truthfully say I never saw such an ordinary set of people as those who composed the Kotomahana's passengers on Friday. Some of the men were most cadaverous looking creatures, and appeared as if they were badly in want of a good square meal, whilst the females were, with one or two exceptions, devoid of good looks and only passable. This was the opinion of a, good many others besides myself, who regretted that a better sample of Auckland humanity bad not boon sent down for the inspection of the residents of Quurtzopolis. — Although, yery little is heard about the approaching fancy dress ball in connection with the Skating Eink, the ladies and gentlemen who intend to take part in it are not allowing tbe grass to grow under their feet, but are busily engaged preparing their costumes ; and if all I hear is true in that respect, some of the dresses will be really worth going to see. A. lady who had signified her intention of appearing as a jockey (a character which, by-the-way, sTie would suit admirably), now announces that she will not appear in costume at all, in consequence of her husband having expressed a wish to that effect. Another lady, wellknown in local musical circles, is going as " Purity " (a most inappropriate character for her to assume, in my opinion), whilst another is thinking of appearing as Lady Godiva ! — It is a fact Avorthy of note that the two bitterest enemies the Observer has on the Thames are gentlemen in good positions, but who practice the utmost meanness, and openly boast that they never have been guilty of purclmsinn: a single copy of the sociefv journal. If they speak the truth, which I very much db'ibt, how comes it that they are so well posted in the contents of the Observer within a very short time after it is received on the Thames each week ? The fact of the matter is. that, these two worthies, who shall ba nameless, have very little to do for their money, and, finding the time hanging heavily on .their heads, employ themselves in fruitless endeavours to ascertain who the Thames correspondent of the Observer is ; and the sooner the attention of their masters is directed to that fact, the better it will be for— well, never mind who. — A well-known biscuit manufacturer, a shipping agent, and a brewer (all belong to Shortlanl) made a trip to the upper country on horseback the other day, and had a mosb miserable time of it, all through a foolish mistake on the part of the kneader of dough, who was acting as guide. After riding- for several hours through a sea of mud and under a pelting rain, they drew near a large barn-like building, which the guide informed them was the hotel; but which, on getting closer, they discovered to be a deserted bushman's whare. By this time it was nightfall, and the " compliments " which were showered down on the man of flour by his companions, on the mistake being discovered, were just too awfully awful to be repeated. The party, tired, weary, and hungry had no other course but to retrace their steps, and it was four hours before they reached their destination. The biscuit manufacturer not being accustomed to pigr-skin, was severely chafed by coming into contact with the leather, and he was compelled to return home by the Patiki, stomach, downwards. There was quite a run on sticking plaster for a few days after the return of the trio.

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