STUBBORN CHILD.

Thames Star, Volume LXIII, Issue 17585, 26 March 1929, Page 6

STUBBORN CHILD.

TELLS HIS SECRET TO SCIENTISTS Distracted mothers who can't understand why their three-year-olds refuse to comply with their wishes will receive some comfort in learning of behavouristic studies of stubborn qualities in children from two to four years of age which have been in progress at the Institute of Child Welfare Research at Teachers' College, Columbia University. Just what causes children of small ago to be stubborn has not wholly been determined, but it was found that children of two years were considerably more stubborn than children of four. One idea put forth from the study is that the child in refusing to comply with demands is struggling to become a personality. This was suggested by Dr. Helen T. Woolley, director of the institute and authority on behaviour of children. ' Another cause, and one which is believed to hold some weight, is that the child may lack adequate language expressions. "No," Dr. Reynolds said, is about the only tool which the two-year-old has at his command to express his willingness to do as we wish him to. 'The four-year-old uses 'Yes, I will in just a minute,'- 'Wait 'til I get through doing this,' and other politer forms, just as adults do under similar circumstances," "Dr. Reynolds continues. . . "The child who says 'I can't,' and, then proceeds to do whatever it was he said he coulnd't do, and the child who says: 'l'm not coming with you, am I?' and then trots peaceably along, without more ado may be examples of this lack of understanding of the language involved rather than instances of opposition." Dr. Reynolds suggests to mothers that they should- mot be harsh when their children refuse to obey. "Any suggestion for managing the stubbornness, or negativism as it is called, or the pre-school child must pre-suppose a sympathetic understanding of the psychology of the child of this age and a genuine respect for him as a peronality. Then on this basis; a spirit of co-operation should be established between the child and the adult. ' "Requests of the child should be couched in the form of 'Let's do this, shall we?' implying a willingness to

meet him at least half-wqy. All but i the absolutely necessarily issues should I be avoided, and his language refusals j should net be taken, so seriously. When i active resistance and defiance are encountered, a break in the proceedings I is more likely to produce the desired j result than ' persistence. Give the child a chance to capitulate and still I save his self-respect." j While offering no general rule for j managing stubborn children Dr. Rev- i nolds suggests the best plan is not to j provoke the child. Sometimes it is j the mother who is stubborn rather j than the child, she says, and for this j the child is often blamed. In explaining the contrariness of j small children Dr. Reynolds says that j the refusal to co-operate makes smooth j running home management almost im- i possible. It is"~not uncommon, she I says, to have a mother say of her i three-year-old: "I can't do a thing with him. He says 'No' to everything and it is often a struggle to get even ' the most essential matters \6f the : day attended to." j "One three-year-old boy of my ac- ' quaintanee whom the above description fits most aptly, formed the habit ! of entering his grandmother's home j each day before anybody even asked j him to do anything with the speech '■ 'Grandmother, I won't.' His attitude was one of 'Whatever you ask me to do. I won't do it.' ' "This illustrates in perhaps extreme form, what we popularly mean by the; term 'contrariness' or 'negativism. 7 I Far from being an abnormal or patlio- ! logical condition at the pre-school age. j it has been generally considered just ; a mood characteristic of the age."