HELPFUL EXERCISE.

Thames Star, Volume LVII, Issue 14742, 23 August 1921, Page 7

HELPFUL EXERCISE.

(By Walt Mason.) T used to sit in pomp and state and took no exercise, and I achieved such grevious weight I pained the doctor’s eyes. ’Twas, very little grub I ate, my appetite unsound; but eveiy , bite increased my weight three-quarters of a pound. And then I heard the doctor : say, “You surely lard the earth; you’ll have to walk twelve miles a day, and thus cut down your girth.” So I put on my nine-league boots, and walked till I was lame, although I never cared three hoots for walking as a game. But one must heed whatever rules the -doctors niay invent, whatever sort of ’pathic schools those docs may represent. And so I walked along the shore ■about a hundred miles, and then I walked a hundred more in all the ragtime styles. The first result of all this toil was appetite renewed; the women had to fry and boil great quantities of food. My appetite was strange and weird it clamoured still for more;, the loaves and fishes disappeared, and all the larder’s store. My weight increased by leaps and bounds, by bounds and leaps it grew, and where I used to gain s;wo pounds I now gain .twenty-two. "The fat man fails in all he does, in all the schemes he tries, and alecks al--wnys buzz around,’’ and talk of exercise.