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Thames Star, Volume VII, Issue 2170, 17 December 1875, Page 4

Shabp Practice.—A lawyer once had an important case, and' the decision depended on the way in which the jury would regard the testimony of one lady. He lost the case because tbe fair witness swore positively to an occurrence which she witnessed at the distance of a few rods, although, there were several per-, sons who stood much nearer than she that saw nothing whatever of it The lawyer looked rather " blue" when the jury brought in their verdict, but revenged himself by rising and telling the court a story of a lady he once knew who was very near-sighted bntalways declared her eyesight to be excellent. Accordingly, one day a "neighbour stuck' a darningneedle in the side of the barn, and placing her on the opposite side of tbe road, asked her if she could see it. "Oh, yes," replied t!ie old, lady, "I can see the needle easy enough—but wbere's the barn?"

A gentleman travelling in Texas, met on a country road a wagon drawn by four oxen, driven by a genuine Texan raDger, who, in addition to the skilful flourish and crack of the whip, was vociferously encouraging, his horned beasts after this fashion: " Haw, Presbyterian ! Gee, Baptist! Ahoh, Episcopalian! Get up, Methodist V" The traveller was struck and also amused at this strange nomenclature, land, stopping tbe driver, "remarked to him • that he had never heard such names applied to the dumb creation before, and asked him why he called his oxen such names. "There," said the man of- Texas, "I call this: ox "Presbyterian" because he is true blue and never fails; pulls through bad places and overcomes difficulties, and holds Out to the end ; besides, he knows more than the rest. I call that one:" Baptist " because he is always after ■water, and seems as though he would never have enough ; then again, he won't eat with the others; I call that one " Episcopalian" because he has a mighty way of holding his head up, and if tbe yoke gets a little tight he tries to kick clear of things. I call this one " Methodist" because he puffs and blows anH you-think lie was'pulling all creation; but he don't pull a-pound unless you continually stir him up."- ; ■ I ;