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Thames Star, Volume VII, Issue 1912, 18 February 1875, Page 3

Sold Again.—A quasi-commercial trareller stopped,at an,hotel and ordered dinner, the "pint of port" not beiDg omitted. When he wjis about to depart I he called up -mine hofcfc, "and gravely informed him that he was very sorry he had no money to pay the bill, but that, if allowed to leave in peace, ho would one day return and " square up." The landlord had been victimised in this way before, and so was irate. He said he would '.'& take it out" of his customer by kicking liiin down the steps of the hotel, and he did so. Some time afterwards, to the landlord's intense, .astonishment, .the^ ;"commercial" A'" reappeaJed. 'He 1 was^ 'polite and forgiving; he bore no malice, '•■ he said, and hjeslioul^be glad if "mine host" host would fav6*lhlm On" this, im- § roved occasion which his company at inner. The victualler was taken aback; he feltthat 6q the previous: occasion he he had been harsh and had misjudged his and with profuse apologies he consented to dine with the man henad before violently ejected from the house. The '}" commercial" ordered a capital dinner, a bottle or two of the best wine in the cellar, and it was altogether a remarkably pleasant party of two. Politics were discussed, trade was ventilated, and all went on merrily till the good things were exhausted. Then the dinner-giver arose, and in the coolest manner possible addressed the landlord as follows—"lhave very much enjoyed this entertainment?; but, as to the bill, I am afraid you will have to take that out as you did before !" A Ceoss Looking Man.—One who Squints.

When young Mr Spitzei* left home for college, he took leave of his mother in this manner —" Mother, I Trill write often and think of you constantly." When he returned two years later, he remarked to the anxious parent: "Dear mothaw, I gweet you once more !" Imagine tho feelings of a fond mother.—Terre Haute Express.