“HEFTY ANNIE.”

Taranaki Herald, Volume LXIV, Issue 145085, 9 September 1916, Page 8

“HEFTY ANNIE.”

HER COUGH IN THE GREAT PUSH,

The young newcomer to the billot sat up wit’ii a- start, and stared in wonderment while the ground rocked under him. . “Needn’t be alarmed, sonny,, quoth an old-timer there as he unconcernedly lighted a ’ lag, ’ “that’s only Hefty Annie’ doing a cough and spit at the Bosches. Never heard big guns harking before. 1 s’uose?” The youngster admired that he had not. “Weii, vou'll soon get used to them here, an’ then you won’t mind them no more’n if they was your mother singing y’ to sleep. It's fine music, in’ hov, lino music when it’s, made by your own side, and damned unwelcome when it’s made by the other.” Having delivered himself of this terse description of gunfire the old-timer .stretched comfortably hack and whiffed his “lag” with great enjoyment. “Hefty Annie” lay out in the fields near by, cunningly concealed from the sharp eyes of the hawk-men from over the -barbed-wire border who were always trying to locate her whereabouts with the .sinister motive of compassing her destruction. Official documents, in their cold, unimaginable way. described her as “Howitzer, loin, mark understanding minds of the men who expended much loving care upon tier. “Annie” was a creature with a soul, something that could he talked to and had a truly feminine way of exacting little attentions from the male folk around her—not a mere cylinder of steel which alternately laboured and slept. But then officialdom, dry as dust and dull of vision, does not understand the psychology of guns as the men who work them do. “Heftv Annie” was not only “hefty” in herself, but she demanded the same useful quality from the “court” over which she queened it with most exacting autocracy. No room there for un- ’■ niiar weaklings nor any slow of.

foot. a hen "Annie" started upon her travels she did so in almost royal state. Her train spread over quite a considerable length of roadway. A huge petrel tractor led the van —ft slrangelooking contraption, with rear wheels almost as high as an omnibus’s knifes board; then came "Ajinie” herself in solitary grandeur upon her special carriage "anil robed in tarpaulins—the s-carlet and ermine of her line. Alter her rolled the ‘•pill-boxes,” otherwise the ammunition wagons (so called because the battery humorist had chalked- "Bills for the Kaiser" on the dull grey sides); then the "wireless" truck and sundry other vehicles all designed for the specific purpose of ministering to “Annie's" needs. These trundled along at a good pace under the persuasion of the tractor, which, although a queer-looking affair in itself, was indubitably "hefty’’ when it came to pulling. Alongside this entourage, and a liil disdainful of it, slid 11 swift grey motor-car in which rode officers—tho "Cabinet” of “Annie's” little realm. Scattered about the wagons were her “subjects”—stalwart fellow? iu khaki wlio loosed humorous- sallies at the passers-by and comported themselves generally’ like merry souls enjoying an outing and not in the least, like men hound on a service that would lead them to where winged death in many forms sought angrily to make end of them. Outwardly, the most sombre of all were tlie men on the tractor, whose faces bore the intent, preoccupied look of the engineer at his work. "fsomewhere in France" at last, and

“Hefty Annie'' was settling down to ■'own a bit of the earth.” Dexterously. yet carefully, her ’‘subjects” went about the task ol erecting her throne. First, they laid the bedplates which formed the base of it; when all was reaily tackles were rigged ami "Annie” was eutliroped with somewhat less pomp, perhaps, hot with far greater solicitude for the permanenry of her seat than is usually shown towards monarcli.s. .Insi what "a.s done, how it was done, and why it was done would make an interesting story. Doubtless history will tell ns all about (he matter one day. This narrative, not being history., must stop at arousing enriositv. and not go on to satisfy'it. Suffice it. therefore, to Any that everything that had to be done was done—swiftly, deftly, and correctly, ms the work of welltrained hands always is. Jt-s completion found “Llefty Annie” sitting grimly on her seat and poking an ugly round snout contemptuously towards the enemy.

“All ready for action, sir!” shouted a subaltern, poking his head into a hole and addressing .someone apparently down in the bowels of tho earth, who answered:

‘‘Righto! What's your full range, did you say!'” .‘‘Fifteen miles or a bit more, sir.” replied the “sub.”; whereat the subterranean voice rumbled hack an expression of great satisfaction. And so it was that “Hefty Annie” began her reign. Some men hung dizzily in the air and “spotted” for her. while other men flung far forward and hidden in lairs like foxes “observed” what followed each time “Annie” spoke and telephoned back terse, though comprehensive enough, descriptions of it. dust, behind her quite a busy little newsroom was kept going, and in response to requests that came through this, “Hefty Annie" raised or lowered her snout or craned it to right or left, seeking out the place where she could do most mischief. At intervals she coughed,a deep, rane.otls “hoof” that ripped its-way through her whole body, .Sometimes she did this just once or twice, at others quite a long paroxysm seized her. As “Annie” coughed she spat from her iron lips great mouthfuls of bright yellow flame, from the midst of which was ejected a huge shell that shrieked viciously away to a place so far off that only the observers aloft and in the lairs ahead could get the dimmest sight of it. Of late “Annie's” nought lias become much worse. h racks her incessantly, and the hoarse haying of it makes sweet music, in the cars of thousands of men in khaki who are relying upon the aid of “Hcftv Annie” and her sisters to accomplish successfully the “Big Rush.” —J.J., in Daily Mail.