KIBBLINGS

Taranaki Herald, Volume XLIV, Issue 10291, 25 April 1895, Page 4

KIBBLI NGS

A. lUlc uonscu c niw nna then, Jj eli^hod by tho wibO3t men. A thing of boaaty ia a joy until the neighbours learn how ran.h it coat, Mahal : With what versed ara you most familiar ? Poet : Reverses. j A " chip from th° old block " sometimes desiro) s tho symmetry of tho family j tree. Jt can not be siul of the prof' ss'onal bankrupt tli.t •' his failings lean to vir- I ttie'a sale. ! Why is a \ oang man, when jilted by a girl, like spirituous hquois ? — He is taken uown. A wag piaced the following placard over his coal bin : Not to be usod except ia case of fire. Why is not the whico of a dog called '. a tick, 08 well as tho souni of a watch ?—? — I It is causoJ by a tick. '• Teeth inserted without gas," as tho fellow who owned a gavaga dogioseitod oq a board out ide his ga-den gate, CANINE INTELLIGENCE. Sanso : Every dog has his day. Hood .• True ; but a jolly dog prefers the night. IT WOULD BE USEFUL. I'd like to borrow one of your longest hose, said a girl to the captain of a fire company. What do yon want it for ? asked the fireman, in surprise. I want to hang it up for Christinas. THE SILLY GIBLS. Girls are no good, said little Johnny : they aint got any sense. How's that ? asked Merritt. Because, was the reasonable reply, as soon as their stockings get big enough to hold a lot os things, they stop hanging them up. AN OLD SATING. "What are you thinking about, my dear ? asked Gazzam of his wife, as she sat in a brown study a few evenings before Christmas. I was thinking, Henry, of the many beauties of that trite old saying— lt is more blessed to receive than to give. And thoii Henry wa3 sorry he spoke. NO CLAIM FOR SPECIAL PRICE Stranger (purchasing Christmas gifts) : You may give me a dozen of Ihosc dolls, half a dozen each of those games and puzzle*, twenty four pounds of sweets, and — Dealor : If you are a dealer, sir, wo \ will make a special price on a quan- J tity. f _ Stranger (sidly) : No. 1 ain't a dealer ; '' I'm a Jloruiun. . Tv'OX TUB CAKE. ; Johnny, i.tiil his father, as the boy J took ,i biMjuit from the plate, don't you , know that it is impolite to help yonrself i before your elders ? " ! Why, pa, mother told mo to. help [ myself before you ! What do you mean ? asked his father ; whils his mother looked up with, astonishment in every feature. Why, I heard mother tell Aunt Hannah that she hoped I wouldn't take after you ; and so I thought I -was to take my biscuit first.