TO RAISE A LAUGH

Taranaki Daily News, 5 October 1929, Page 24 (Supplement)

TO RAISE A LAUGH

Tommy (aged six): “Papa, is it proper to call a man born in Poland a Pole?’’ Papa: “Certainly, my boy." Tommy: “Then I suppose a man born in Holland is a Hole?" # * * Teacher (giving lesson ou birds); “Now, why do mother birdies sit oh their eggs?” Little Girl: “I ’spects it’s cause they haven’t got any chairs.” * * * * Teacher: ”An anonymous person is one who floes not wish’ Io be known - Who is talking in class?” A voice; "An anonymous person, ( earlier. ’ # * *„ * Some little boys were boasting al school about their daddies. “Aly daddy," said one. “has got lots and lots of money.” “Pooh!” cried the others. “That’s nothing! Billy’s father can waggle his ears and moo like a cow.” « * * * Au inventor was endeavouring to interest a company promoter in his latest wonder. “Believe me, sir,” said the inventor, “this is an epoch making machine.” “Oh, is it?” queried the man of wealth. “Then let me sec it make an epoch.” * * * * The- tramp asked the lady of the house for money. “Aren’t you the same man J gave some, cake to a week ago ?” “No, mum,” replied the tramp. “And the doctor says I never will be again.” *- ' «■ « * The singer had just left the stage. “How I envy that man!” said a listener. ’ . . . r, „ “But he can’t sing: his voice is awful, replied his friend. ‘I know that,” said Hie first speaker, “but think of the. nerve of the man to imagine ho can.” # # # # The visitor from town had asked so many questions that the farmer began to feel impatient. “Why do. you use such a heavy roller on your potato field?’’ was the next question. “Well,” replied the farmer, “you. see, this year I am growing mashed potatoes.’’ ‘«* * * . An inquisitive person was boring a famous flying man with numerous questions. ■“And supposing,” said the bore, “that your parachute failed to open when you jumped from the ’plane. What would you do?” “’Oh,” replied the airman, “I should take it back and change it.” BACHELOR ONCE. Signor Mussolini has not waited for suggestion or budget but is taxing the •bachelors of Italy and taxing them roundly. Example is contagious, and as the new impost of the Italian Premier has attracted great attention we may possibly see it extended to other countries. Wo have never had a form of tax on the bachelors of Great Britain—at any rate not by that name. Practical Scotland, however, once established a system which was even more thoroughgoing than Italy’s. It was in what presumably would be called the “good old times” of Scotland, toward the close of the 13th century. An Act passed by the Scottish Parliament ordained that every maiden lady of both high and low estate “shall have liberty to bespeak the man she likes.” If he refused to marry her he was condemned to pay a fine of £lOO or less, as his estate might be. The only lawful excuse he could make was that he was already engaged. In that case he was free. How long that law lasted does not appear clear. •