A Polar Bear's Spree.

Te Aroha News, Volume IV, Issue 160, 10 July 1886, Page 7

A Polar Bear's Spree.

He was very bald-headed for so young r man — in fact, there appeared to be no hair on his head ab all, but a fringe of carroty whisker which was visible above the edge of his celluloid collar left one to infer that the curls of which nature had bereft him u ere originally of a similar hue. The end of his nose was tinted to match, and his whole appearance reminded one of a Connecticut deacon run to seed. He had just arrived in Chicago that evening, and the confidence operators did not know what to make of him. He threw his gripsack down behind the stove in the bar-room of a West Side hotel, kicked the spittoon into a convenient position, took the only four-legged chair, and made himself as much at home as possible. He said nothing to anybody, and, beyond squirting an occasional stream of tobacco-juice at the stove, exhibited no symptoms of animated existence. The boys did n t know bow to seize him — whether to lake him for a State Fair visitor or a missionary ; so, as the be^t way of opening the conversation, Skin-an'-Bone Jake asked him to take a drink. The stranger gave a deep sigh, and rising to his feet, walked slow ly to ihe bar, helping himself to a big horn of Blue Gla^s whisky, and swallowed it at a gulp. " Gents," he said, "here's to you. I have di unk every sort of beer fiom lager bcci to champagne, but the fire-water of the p ile face? knocks 'em all out. In tact," he added, " it saved my life once in a most extraordinary manner." ''Tell us how it was, stranger," said Skin-an'-Bone Jake. " Waal," said the stranger, with a drawl, " me and two other chaps was on a hunting expedition for seals andsuch like, up on the north -webt coast of Alaska, in the winter of 7S. It wa*j powerful cold, an' no mistake — a matter of 1-00 degrees or &o below death. We were pretty successful— had got a good many seal skins, and had shot a couple of bears, when we met with an accident. Our boat was smashed in a jam of ice, and there was nothing tor it but a tramp of 150 mtles to the nearest Esquimaux; village. We hadn't got far on the way when I tumbled into a hole in the ice, and cut and bruised my legs so that I couldn't walk a step further. It was death to stay there, for our provisions were nearly all lost when our boat was smashed, and what wo had left were running very short. So Bill Smith and Jim Kenny left me to take care of myself while they went for help. They left all the skins we had saved from the wreck for me to take care of, as well as enough grub to last until they got back, and a small keg of whisky that we had brought along with the other things on a sled made of the timbers and planks of the boat. They made me a sort of house to crawl into of slabs of ice. I watched them as they trotted away over the snow, their footsteps leaving no impression on the hard, frozen gush, and I felt so melancholy when they were out of sight that I thought I would brace myself up with a little suthin'. The whisky was half -frozen in the keg, so we had busted in the top. I had to break the ice to get at it. ' I guess I'll have to chop the licker with a hatchet if this cold keeps on,' says Ito myself. I was just agoin' to dip some out of the keg with a tin cup when what should I see, coming over the ice, lickety-split, but a polar bear the biggest I ever set my eyes on. There was no use trying to run away with my lame leg, so I crawled into my ice-house, and looked out through the slabs with one eye, hoping he would pass without seeing me. But there was no such luck. When he got within a hundred yards he turned up his nose to the house as if smellin' suthin'; and then made a bee-line straight in my direction. Waal, my heart went right down into my boots ; I don't think I ever felt so tired in my life. ' It's all up with you, pard,' I says to myself. ' You won't never shoot no more seals in this world. That bear is hungry— l see it in his eyes— and you are his meat.' I hadn't no weapon, not even a knife, for they had all sunk when our boat was smashed. There didn't seem fco be three cents' worth of chance for me, so I lay down with my nose in the 3now, waiting to be dragged out, like a rat from a hole. I heard the bear's step outside, and a loud snuffing. Then, all being quiet for a moment, I lookedout between the slabs of ice and saw the bear. He was standing with his snout in the a\ liisky keg drinking with all his might ; I could hear it gurgle as it went down his throat. When he finished his drink he began to stagger around, and, after amusing himself for a while tumbling about and trying to stand on his head, he turned over on his back and went to sleep, drunk as a lord. As soon as I saw the beast was helpless, I crawled out on all fours and eat on the top of it, to get warm and think. The more I thought, the more necessary it seemed to do something at once. If he got sober he would gobble me up to a certainty, and it was useless to try -to run, for I couldn't get far with my game leg. If I had had even a penknife I might have killed him while he l.iy in that helpless condition ; but I didn't have a weapon of any sort. I sat on top of the bear and thought for more'n two hours. He was a white elephant on my hands, an' no mistake. What should Ido with him ? And what would he do with me when he got sober ? If he would only stay drunk until the other fellows came back ! By Jove ! that was the idea. I propped up his shaggy head in the whiskykeg to get it into a convenient position and to thaw the licker by the warmth of his body, and, taking a tin funnel and the cup I poured about four quarts of whisky down his throat Boys, yoa may not believe the story, but its gospel truth I'm telling you —I kept that bear in a beastly state of intoxication for nigh onto a week, an' slept with him every night to keep warm He was like a stove ; if it hadn't been for him I'd have froze." " But what did you do when the whisky gave out. ? " " Waal," said the Arctic explorer, slowly and reflectively, ," I must confess I felt mimmat annoyed myself about that. But before the lieker was quite gone; the bear got such a fit of delirium tremens on him that he .walked through a hole in the ice ■and was drowned. That was the night before Bill and Jim came back.-" >«If that aintt-the , b v iggest lie I, ever heard," „said Skin»n'-BQne-iTake, "may I be blest 1" -. , i,» „ , . • ,