TOPICAL TITBITS

Sun (Auckland), Volume II, Issue 584, 9 February 1929, Page 27

TOPICAL TITBITS

No, it’s John Barrymore, not Marry - more. —Tampa Tribune. Business success, falls to the “ad”venturous, —Wall Street Journal. Physician says one million women are overweight. These, of course, are round figures. —Arkansas Gazette. “Man’s next great war will be with insects.” Who ever heard of a war without them? —Washington Post. “Should an airplane be referred to as ‘she’?” asks an inquiring subscriber. All except the mail planes. —Nashville Southern Lumberman. * * * Intelligence Test: Any collection of forty or fifty questions to which the eminent psychologist giving the test happens to know the replies. —Detroit News. Again comes assurance that the wets are to be smitten hip and thigh: the former, at least, is a singularly vulnerable point. —Cincinnati Times-Star. “Putting Planes Within Reach of the | Man in the Street,” says “The Digest.” Well, the automobile shouldn’t have a monopoly of the hit-and-run sport. —Fountain Inn (S.C.) Tribune. We learn from the Press that broadcasting has added five hundred words to the average radio fan’s vocabulary. And we wouldn't dare to print any of them. —J udge.

Pot Hunting Barred. —ln Chicago a plumber was shot while going to work. The best gunmen, however, scorn to shoot at anything but a moving target On the Air. —“ls it true that Mabel has a secret sorrow?” “Heavens, yes! Hasn’t she told you about it?” When a Kick is Unwelcome: It is easy enough to understand wliy men. don’t waste any time trying to keep cider sweet, but hard to figure why they don’t think it is worth the effort to try to keep their wives that wav. The Worm. —“My dear.” remarked Jones, who had just read a book on “The Wonders of Nature,” “Nature is marvellous! When I read a book like this it makes me think how puerile, how insignificant is man.” “Huh!” said his wife. “A woman doesn’t have to wade through 400 pages to discover that.” Like Balaam’s. —“Shut that door! Where were you brought up—in a barn ?” The man addressed complied meekly and silently. The first speaker observed that he was in tears* and. going over to the man, he apologised. “Oh, come,” he said soothingly, “you shouldn’t take it to heart because I asked if you were raised in a barn.” “That's it, that’s it.” sobbed the other man. “I wajs brought up in a barn, and it makes me homesick every time T hear an ass bray.”