By “THE LOOK-OUT MAN.”

Sun (Auckland), Volume II, Issue 538, 15 December 1928, Page 8

By “THE LOOK-OUT MAN.”

THE CAVE MAN John Kilonis, whose “cave man” wrestling has attracted much attention, is a champion dancer. “Good looks aren’t everything,” says Kilonis, who won a jazz competition at Bondi. I am wrestler John Kilonis , The Stadium Adonis, And 1 shake a pretty ankle in “the Blues.” When the saxes start to bellow, i’m a social sort of fellow; My waltzing causes experts to enthuse. 1 have found, the light fantastic Helps to keep the muscles plastic, And it also gives me practice with my grips, For I demonstrate the “hammer” Jn most gentlemanly manner On my partner as she innocently trips. Should her guardian (by wedlock) Interpose , I clamp a headlock On his skull , or else I plant him rather flat With a model “Flying Mare/’ And 1 leave him lying there Where the wrestlers make their money—- . on the .Mat. HA CKENSCHMID T. PLAYER-WRITER W. H. Ponsford, o£ the Australian cricket team; has broken a bone in his hand. It is to be hoped that it is not his writing hand. * * * CHRISTMAS ODDMENTS It’s never too late to, spend. Where there’s a swill there’s a sway. Suggested entree for the hairdresser’s annual luncheon: Tugged hair. “I’m forging ahead,” said the counterfeit coin maker, as he turned out a 1929 half-crown. PAMPERED TROUT South Island fresh-water snails have been brought to Arapuni to provide a palatable menu item for Arapuni trout. It seems a little unfair, but perhaps a party of South Island anglers could arrange to avenge the martyred snails. OUR ETERNAL SPRING With picturesque flourish, Mr. K. K. Lalkaka, an Indian visitor to New Zealand, describes the Dominion as “this land of eternal spring.” He complained of the tremendous seriousness of New Zealanders, and it seems as if he is making an attempt to see if we have any sense of humour at all. HOW TIMES DO CHANGE Two Dutch gunboats, convoying old masters to an art exhibition in London, will pay a courtesy visit to the Thames. It was not ever thus. The greatest humiliation in England’s naval history was forced upon her when Dutch men-of-war sailed up the Thames. De Ruyter and his fleet captured many English ships, and destroyed others. Their pennons waved within sight of London. But that was more than two centuries ago. Today the power of England and the Netherlands is welded in world wide petroleum interests. The old masters would almost step out from their frames in surprise if they knew that Dutch tugs towed an English naval dock out to the Indies.

MATRICULATION CURSE “Education does not mean the mere acquisition of knowledge,” said the Rev. D. D. Scott at Te Papapa yesterday. At almost the same time, Miss E. M. Johnston, headmistress of the Auckland girls’ Grammar School, was complaining that many of the papers set for the matriculation examination put a premium on the work of the “crammer.” It seems, therefore, that a scholar who is being educated in the fullest sense is at a disadvantage when competing with “blotting paper" minds. Educationists express all manner of pretty theoretical opinions, but they make no effective attempt to amend the matriculation examination system, which most authorities now agree is obsolete. The hectic grind that precedes the examination cannot be supported by reason or theory. * =» * SIR HARRY ARRIVES Sir Harry Lauder, who has arrived in New Zealand for the sword-fishing season, receives his morning mail: Dear Sir Harry,— On behalf of the Russell Chamber of Commerce, Kororareka Business Men’s Association, and Bay of Islands Beachcombers’ League, I am instructed to offer you a hearty welcome to these shores. Your reputation as a free spender has preceded you, and we are expecting a bumper season. We respectfully request that you he not too liberal with your tips, as it might demoralise our population. Yours faithfully, FERGUS McHAGGIS.