Shaun’s Patch

Southland Times, Issue 21636, 23 February 1932, Page 6

Shaun’s Patch

A ItUle BOWBM m and Uwn I« niißbed by tho wW ®«- —Kodlbraa.

One of the paradoxes is that people argue if there is free exchange the rate for it will be higher. * * * ♦ The man who is prepared to resign his seat to allow Mr Lang to enter Federal politics is Mr Gander. The lyre, Zarathrustra 1 To custom we must pander And bitter truth let loose: The seat that suits a Gander Is a seat to suit the goose. « ; » ■ ■ * * Mr Muckerji crashed in the Viceroy’s Trophy at the India Aero meeting. Well, considering his machine as a mount, you’d expect Mr Muckerji to. * * * « Mr de Valera says: “We desire to live peacefully with England.” Perhaps to live peacefully, but not '“with” England. » * * * People watching the Japanese advance from ihe Kiangwan racecourse probably said: “What’s the odds.” Green in yellowed fields will start to sprout Now Canterbury has finished with its drought, And farmers watching rivulets that run Will murmur: ‘Yes, but it’s been overdone.” Britl’K film people declined to handle the picture of the ascent of Mount Kamet in the Himalayas because "it lacked love interest.” And yet how easily this could have been supplied: Jeanette MacDonald frigid Aphrodite, Sings softly in a lace and georgette nightie. And Ronald Colman, charging on a bicycle Coasts down to her upon a gleaming icicle. They meet at last upon a heaving glacier— Jeanette is wearing frocks a little lacier— And when we’ve learned how thin our Jeanny’s here io. And noticed that they’ve dodged frostbitten noses, We see that Ronald spies the glances leery Where on the highest peak is Wallace Beery. He says a Lonsdale line, whips up a boulder And flips it on to Beerys heavy shoulder, Who spins, just like a coil named after Tesla, And falls into the arms of Marie Dressier. So 'hey escape, and coming off the mountain Have drinks with Smythe beside a Rajah's fountain, Where Ronald, breathing once more natural oxygen, Upon a visioned Wallace Beery mocks agen, While swoet Jeanette, safe in her sumptuous bower Repeats the theme song as she takes a shower. • •» * * FAMOUS OILS. Palm ——■ of Lavender. Petrol. Turin . ——skins. right. T . * • « • These people who marry in aeroplanes are like those who marry without visible means of support. SOUTHLAND LIMERICKS. There was a young lady called Susan Who was found in an alleyway snusan. When told she was tight She said: “That's not right I’m out on tho loose—i.e. busan.” EDUCATIONAL AIDS. Give a sentence containing the word “rectify”: “The boat will be rectify keep on this course.” » « e « PEACEFUL GANDHI. Mahatma Gandhi’s argument Hath many sour ingredients— And principally he’s intent On Civil Disobedience; But that involves a little strife, A riot when his people pull it, A bomb, at other limes a knife And eke a stray assassin’s bullet. But Gandhi violence deplores, On peaceful methods he’s intent Which shows, though he may talk of wars, Of warlike thoughts he’s innocent. He merely says: “I hate a fight, The soldier’s really low-class mud; But you resist with all your might E'en if it means your letting blood. “I am a man of peaeful thought I’ll shun the nasty violent way So long as they—just as they ought— Do every mortal thing I say.” War spoils a division; but think of the division of the spoils.