Shaun’s Patch

Southland Times, Issue 21192, 19 September 1930, Page 8

Shaun’s Patch

A little non.en« now Md then I. relished by the wiwst men. —Hudlbrss.

That part of the halyards was the worst part of Shamrock V’s luck. *** * . The Americans had more money and Enterprise. ♦ 4 * » If China obtained a seat on the Council of the League of Nations which part of the country would be represented? * » * * Irish people who now have to pay taxes have realised that it i,s by no means a free State. » * ♦ ■» EDUCATIONAL AIDS. From A. 8.: Give a sentence containing the word "urgent”: “Mary went out with urgent.” * * * * Jute prices are low. No juty on jute. * * * * The rather conceited young lady said: “Next to myself I like silk underwear best.” * # * * I am convinced that the only way to save this country is to reduce the wages of everyone else, and to tax them, too. * * * * With flying colours: The house-painter leaves his job with unpremeditated haste. * * * * FAMOUS HORSESHobby — . Ph ar Lap. Towel . cries. pipechestnut. Chestnut . Sea — -. tralia. Haw, Haw. .** * * I understand that pedestrians prefer balloon tyres. * * * * SOUTHLAND LIMERICKS. There was a young man of Pahia Who insisted he always could fasia, His eyesight could track Round the earth and his back He’d discern, and we murmured “Rahlia?” * * * * Mr Lysnar doesn’t believe in party politics being introduced into national questions, but he has no objections to a little personal feeling. The Meat Board, for instance. * « » * Sometimes we are ready to agree .that the United States is a freak country. What is the difference between a man buying a hat and a woman engaged in the same operation? About two hours. * * * * The first feature about this new calendar movement is that it will provide thirteen firsts of the months, —one more bill to pay. * * * * INSINCERITY. I have noticed that the statesman Who fills his shining hour With plaints that he is sick to death Of public place and power When comes election time again Joins in the fight with might and main. He says his life is like a dog’s He’s at the beck and call Of everyone and yet he’s not Prepared to chuck it all; If he’s not asked again to stand His cries of protest fill the land. There is a case you all must know Of good old What’s-his-name, Who reckoned he was bored to tears By even thought of fame— How painfully he was surprised When his worth wasn’t recognized. The man who says he doesn’t care That he’s not worth a jot, Has either tried and come a crash Or else is talking rot, For who is there content to be Accepted as a nullity?