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Southland Times, Issue 2142, 28 June 1875, Page 2

Why I Go to Church.—Masculine Eeasons. — Because Canon Manley is safe to utter some home truth from the pulpit which no one dare say out of it, and one likes to see how awfully scandalised the old fogies of both sexes are safe to be at it. Because one feels curious to ascertain to what lengths of rot old Boshville can go in the pulpit. Because one likes to see how near that young Hubrick can get to Rome without actually crossing the Eubicon. Because, unless Igo to-day, the opportunity may be lost, — if one ia to believe my Liberationis t neighbor, old Jawkina — the church is aafe to be disestablished, if not next week, next year at latest. Because one likes to set a good example. Because one catches glimpses of all the pretty girls in the parish, Because most respectable people go. Because I reallly should like to believe m something or other, only I haven't time to decide for myself what that something should be, and a fellow might get a lead at church some Sunday, perhaps. — Punch. " There* a woman at the bottom of erery mischief," said Joe. " Yes," replied Charley, " when I was a boy my mother proved that to be true." From this, one may reasonably infer that the old lady went to the foundation of the matter.