HERE AND THERE.

South Canterbury Times, Issue 6753, 6 February 1892, Page 2

HERE AND THERE.

Stanley is in many ways a man difficult to understand. But the greatest puzzle is bow a man who baa done such work as he has, and has occupied such a place as he has—a sort of demigod among (even an ignorant) people—conld allow himself to be rushed about the world by a theatrical agent, and be ordered to talk to measure at that agent’s choice. It is a humiliating business. Palmerston North has had so many fires lately that whenever a bell rings now the people say 11 Hark! i< that the fire bell P’ 1 The moat awelliah of Now Zealand societies must surely be the one with a real live Queen among its office-bearers. This is the Poly-

neaian Society recently organised at Welling ton, which has the Queen of Hawaii as its patron.

The first man of Mr Oadman’s exploring party to break from the bush into a clearing at the Stratford end of the journey was Mr Jackeon Palmer, M.H.R. .Hie first question to the settler whose clearing they struck was Have yon any liquor ?"

The Ramsgate lifeboat men wore the subjects of a curious •* sell ” a couple of months ago. People on the cliffs saw what was thought to be two rockets fired by a ship in distress off the Goodwins. The lifeboat went to the rescue, only to learnfrom the lightship men than the lights seen were not rockets, but falling meteors.

A supporter of the present Ministry, a landholder in a moderate way, saye he has no fear of the Liberal policy injuring him as a landowner. “ No,” ho eaya, “ what frightens me, what is bringing my few grey hairs with sorrow to the grave, is something else. I will confide it to your sympathising bosom, Mr Editor, in the full confidence that you will not print this part of my loiter. My wife’s section adjoins mine, and the haunting fear that is shortening my life, is lest she should call upon me to fence ! What should I do in such a case ? I should bo obliged to pay for my own half of the fence and hers too 1 I am far more afraid of this than of any of the Ministerial schemes.”

It is alleged that a Picturesque Atlas canvasser, somewhere in the southern wilds, importuned a farmer to such an extent that the latter put the " fiend " through a threshing machine. The machine'was in motion at the time. When the canvasser came through at the small end, the piece of him that had the voice in it, said softly, ‘ Now, to get to business, Mr M —will you take it in the parts or complete P Catholic Times.

When the Governor’s party were travelling down the Westland coast, one of (he yarns goes, they found the sandflies a great annoyance. But while the Governor suffered much, Mr Seddon escaped their attentions, and he said to Eis Excellency “ Ob, let ’em bite away, my Lord j it is very seldom that they get a taste of blue blood, and they quite enjoy the luxury." The honourable gentleman went so far as to hold out his hand as a tempting bait for the flies, but what was H's Excellency’s surprise to see the flies alight on his chum’s outstretched palm, end nimbly hop off again, without inflicting even the semblance of a bite. 11 You see,” went on the wicked one, “they won’t touch common blood.” But Mr Peddon afterwards had mercy on his companion, and gave him a supply of his camphorated lard, a smearing of which is an armour of proof agaiuet sand flies.

“ Woomera ” in the Australasian of the 26th December has the following .-—A New Zealand legislator is very popular in his constituency ; he is also invariably hard up, and a little time ago some of his friends got up a testimonial for him. Having raised £2OO, they had to find some other excuse for sending it to him than the fact that he wanted it badly, and accordingly a letter was written expluitiing that in appreciation of bis Parliamentary services, and as a small token of esteem, they begged etc The law, unfortunately, forbids a member to accept any more material recognition of his Parliamentary services than indigestion from a second-class banquet, so the recipient of the £2OO, following the advice of a much older statesman, replied that he could not accept the money, even had it been £2OOO, and begged to return his private cheque for the amount. And members of the committee remarked what a high-minded chap ha was, until the cheque was returned from the bank marked “ Account overdrawn.”