Page 6 Advertisements Column 3

Pelorus Guardian and Miners' Advocate., Volume 26, Issue 63, 3 August 1915, Page 6

ROBERT’S TIP. He had made a hearty meal at a fa* l (aurant, ani getting up, ho said to «w waiter: 11 1 deelira if I haven’t forgotten mj purse. 11 The waiter fired up, mid hurled big words at him for full three minutes before pausing for breath. When a chance came the stranger continued —" But I have half-a-sov. here in my waistcoat pocket.' The waiter couldn’t smile tq save his life. HE OBJECTED TO THE RENT. A lawyer made out a bill to a client whd was a bit of a wag in his way’, most of the items were for trifling services, and covered several sheets of foolscap. The client went to settle with the man 01 law, and stood at the door with the request that he would receipt it. " Please come in," said the lawyer, in his most cordial tones. “Not much," replied his client; "you'd charge me rent if I did." FREE OPERA GLASSES. A pair of opera glasses will, this year, b< attached to every seat in all the theatres ol Warsaw, Russia. Every glass will be fastened with a chain to the chair. No money writ be needed to cause the lever to slide aside. The contract for furnishing alljthe required glasses has been awarded to a German manufacturer, who will charge nothing for them, and will present them to the various theatres in 1902, provided that till then he receives 3 cents on every theatre ticket sold in the Warsaw theatres. The managers of the Warsaw theatres think (hey can afford to pay this royalty. " QUICK MARCH!" A preacher was addressing an out-dooi crowd in the city, when a drunken soldier came up and ridiculed the service. Finding it was u.-ioicsa to ignore the man, the preacher said : “ Ah, my friend, you are no soldier; you have only borrowed those clothes! No servant of the Queen would gel drunk and interrupt a peaceful service." Ihe man protested that he was a soldier and invited the minister to test him. “Very well," was the reply. “I will Now, attention !" 1 his the soldier did as well as his condition 'allowed. “ Night about face I” , This was also accomplished with soint trouble. “ Now, quick march !” And off he went, marching down the road at a desperate pace, unable to see the preacher's successful manoeuvre. COMPARISON. OF AREAS. The largest state in the civilised world is i'oxas, which has an area of 274,356 square miles; the smallest is the little state ol Monaco in Europe, which only has an area of six square miles. The Austrian empire contains 240,943 square miles ; the Germas smpire, 212.091 square miles; France .204,091; Spain, 177,781 ; Sweden, 168,045 , California, 157,801; Dakota, 150,932 ; Terri tqry of Montana, 143,776 ; Norway, 122,280, New Mexico, 121,201; Great Britain and Ireland, 120,879 ; Italy, 114.296 ; Arizona, IJ3 91C; Nevada, 112,090; Colorado, 104,500. Territory' Wyoming, 97,883; Oregon, 95,274: Xermbfy of Idaho, 86,294; Territory of Utah, U4J476: Minnesota, 83,531; Kansas. 80,891 ; N.efcmka, 75,4,55 ; Territory of Washington, 69,994 1 Indian Territory, 68,991; Missouri, 65,350; Turkey in Europe 62,025 ; Roumania, 45,642; Bosnia .and Herzegovina, 28,125 ; Bulgaria, 24.360; Servia, 20,850 : Netherlands, 20,527; Greece, 19,9411 Switzerland, 15.235; Denmark, 14,553! Easin' Koumelia, 13.500; Belgium, 11,373 Monteruk'ro, 1,770. '

HOGAKtK AND HIS PATRON. Hogarth was once applied to by a miserly old nobleman to paint on his staircasl a representation of Pharaoh's host in the Rec Sea' In attempting to fix on the price Hogarf.it became quite dissatisfied. The miser was unwilling to give more than hali the real value of the picture. At lasi Hogarth, out of all patience, agreed to his patron's terms. Within a,day or two the pic l ure u ;is ready. The nobleman was surpri-rH at such expedition, and In*mediate -ihM to examine it. Thecanvas .vas oait-.u 1 over red. ~ : • t- 'd. ends . said the purchaser, “ what nave ■ ibeid? I ordered a scene of the '.-ted Sea. ’ TVic Rt ' Sek you have," said Hogarth, itillsinartinff<l> have? his talems undervalued But wliera'Aj-e the Israelites ?" They are all &epe over." ' " And where are the Egyptians ?" “ They are all drowned." The miser’s confusion fiould only be equalled by the haste with which he paid his bill. 'ws. THE FIRST WAR MEDAI> Probably the tirst medal conferred in England' for services in the field was one authorised''to be issued by Charles I. in 1643, to sudj soldiers as might distinguish themselves m -s forlorn hopes," It was to re made of silver, and was to be wore .03 :he breast of every msm who should be cesrafied by the commanders-in-chief to have done faithful service in the forlorn hope, ft was, in fact, the Victoria Cross of that time, the commanders and wardens of the Mint being required to keep a register of this names of all those upon whom the decoration was conferred. In June, 1643, Charles I. ordered a gold medal to be struck for Robert 'JVelch, an Irish gentleman, who a i the battle of Edgehill recovered the standard of the King’s Own Regiment, which .had been taken by the Parliamentary forces, 4nfi who also captured two pieces of cannon, ,«er (vhich services he had been previously khigtated. This war medal, which bore the effigies «si the King and Prince Charles, with the insOGvjL-tion, " Per Regale Mandatum Caroli Regie hoc.(w/Sgnatnr Roberto Welch, Militi," seems to ’have been the first which was worn as a personal decoration, s.

THE LAST OF THE WAR CHIEFS. Another most remarkable man Tsosieten, war chief of Taitka, now—if ,nqt ,desd —a very aged mas. In old times his prowess f in war was sung along the coast for many,« ' league, and stiii lives in the memory of the neighbouring tribes, whose terror he was. War after war he waged with them, until the • whole coast paid tribute to him, and he' really did not know his wealth in slaves and blankets. Sometimes he would buy slaves , —if captives from more distant tribes so much the better —give them canoes and provisions, and set them off to their homes. Then everybody would gather round and gagerly ask," Ohl who bought you and set you free ?" "Tsosieten bought me and set me free.” Then great was the name of Tsosieten. In "piping times of peace” he lived on " Indian Island,” in a stockaded fort armed with cannon which he had bought from the Imperial Fur Company in Russian America, and inside its pickets waa the village of his chosen warriors, Alas !-* sic transit gloria mundi-r-i>lind and helpless, last of his name,, when I last saw him ha still lived in his ruined fort, with only the recollections of his former deeds to console him. “They all call themselves chiefs nowadays," he said bittarlyjo sqp. “ I arc theonly “