A WONDERFUL INVENTION.

Pelorus Guardian and Miners' Advocate., Volume 17, Issue 61, 4 August 1903, Page 2

A WONDERFUL INVENTION.

I suppose you all know Tom Scrooloose. And if you don't, jou know, gibers like him. He is always on the brink of'malnng a fortune. In fact, he can balance himself upon a brink longer than anybody I know. Nice fellow is Scrooloose. Everybody likes him; amiable and obliging, but—well, he's Scrooloose. I never meet him but he hair some new scheme.

Yesterday .he invited me out to lunch. Nothing mean about Scooloose.

The luncheon ordered, he broke out

" Old man, I've hit it at last. Biggest idea of the age. No more hand-to-mouth existence for me after I get my invention patented. Can't possibly slip up I his time, nnd the initial expenses will be small." " What's the scheme ?" I asked, with some of his enthusiasm. " You know how the East Indian fakirs show you a seed and cause it to develop into a plant, and to bud, blossom, and bear fruit while you wait V " 1 have read of Buch things," said I cautiously. " Well, I will show a man's life while you wait. From birth to old age. You may watch the development of character from day to day by means of my invention, and all in the space of a minute. You see, I have a nephew a week old. I also know a photographer very well. Every day sinco its birth I have had the baby's picture taken. Only the head and face, mind you." " I see," said I.

" Well, bit, I have made arrangements with that photographer to take a picture of my nephew every day at noon until be is 70 years old. Catch on ? The change from day to day will be very gradual, but by the time he has tilled out the allotted span I shall have upwards of 26,000 pictures. These films will be all joined in chronological order, and then by running them through a vitascope in the usual way I'll have a whole life thrown upon the screen. Sublime idea ! I'll hire a suitable theatre and fill it full of capitalists, promoters, and newspaper men. I'll hold the initial picture of my cunning little nephew upon the screen for a minute that they may study his features, and then I'll say : ' Here's what yon might call a fast, life,' start the thing a-going, and the face will'run through the seven ages in a couple of minutes. Very interesting to everyone! Imagine the sensation! Why, I'll sell my rights to every country on the globe btifore I leave the plate, and I'll be rich beyond the wildest dreams of avarice. Perfectly feasible, too isn't it? You're always picking flawßin my inventions, but yon can't find anything the matter with this. I expect to show the thing next winter, and after that I'll live like a prince. Have something else, won't you ?" I declined with thanks and with real regret I said, " It's all right old man, but for one thing. The idea is great, and there's money in it, but have you considered that it will take just seventy years to complete your collection of 'human documents?' Where do you expect to be seventy yeais from now?"

His monosyllabic response may have been an answer to my question or it may have been an expletive merely. ..