VOICE FROM A COFFIN.

Patea Mail, Volume VI, Issue 520, 15 May 1880, Page 2

VOICE FROM A COFFIN.

The following unique letter baa been addressed to the Mail, and is printed in fac-similie in order to present this unknown genius in his native humour : Mr Editor —lf any Body calls at your Office Enquireing for : the Dover two Handled Coffin Maker you can say he his moving right along towards our town and Intends to hang out near our office He dont want the Mayor and Corporation to turn oiit in his honour and the Military Need not trouble they are best at home chopping firewood and nursing the y r oung offsprings if the Military in Christchurch had done that there would have been nothing stolen from the Children and the Old women would not have had their Apple shops Busted up I am at present traveling in Cog Like queen Wictoraidoes I mean to Jerk of a few lines for your Walliable Paper just to let you know how I thrive ami my Observations on the way, I am just Going into Palmerston North tOHthyftw'trSy Oil onithe,trdubled3,Waters Believe they have had a good few waters here of late what a pity they were not

spiritooa! Waters Eh Palmerston North is lit up with four Kerosene lamps and a Policeman the latter goes out at Klevn O’cloclc sometimes Before I wont into the town to reconiter last night and fell into a’ Big; bole I was afraid to move until the niorhihg But when went to the wife of my Busso n with a Lump on my Eye as big as a New Churns Bundle she wiient for mo width the long 4 II andled Broom that was laying in the ; Bottom of fclieAV-m 11 Wanted a little Salad Oil to Cool my head—she said it was Carrols Clarindon Oils I Wanted -I smiled a Ghastly smile Trooly tin’s is a Whale of Tears A town that can afford Four Kerosene Lamps and a policeman can surely afford a coffin maker. I have two pattuers With me a man may look as ugly as sin during life But him into one of my two Handled Coffins and he makes a sweet corpse We find them Handy on the Road for the Offsprings to sleep in Angelcna lays in one my son and Heir Thcopulus in the other—my wife and myself occupy (lie Bottom of the wan if yon could sec nswhen we arc all in the Arms of Morphus .yon would say we Where Closely United To be continued in my next JINGLING JOHNSON.