THE FRANKLEY PAPERS.

Otago Witness, Issue 3043, 10 July 1912, Page 82

THE FRANKLEY PAPERS.

By Edith Howes

XI.—THE NEW HUSBAND

Just as in the eame household there may be persons of a modern habit of thought living side by side with those of a mind development suitable only to cjoms past age, so in. our communities there may be found side by side to-day the ancient and the modern type of husband, the lord and the comrade. The lord is still vastly in the majority; the comrade is new and rare, a delightful and most modem .and slowly increasing manifestation of chivalry. i'or this new husband actually tries to treat his wife as an equal. In spite of the inliuence of long centuries in which she has been looked, upon as a chattel, in spite of the disabilities under which she has suffered, and still suffers in regard to the law, in spite of her existing dependence on his labour for her food and clothing and every penny she spends, in spite of the whole superiority of hid position, he' finds it possible to place her nearly on a. level with himself, to think of her "as an individual whose opinions may be valued, whose likes and, dislikes and even whose hobbies may be respected as he expects his to be respected. He is certainly new, admirably, charmingly new.

His chivalry stands far above that past chivalry which glorified itself in courtly service to woman in public, only to treat her in private with neglect or absolute brutality. His is the home-living, 9-o'clock-in-the-morning chivalry, the chivalry which denotes a finer generosity than man has ever before manifested. This new husband talks to his wife, talks to her of his outside activities, h:s plana, or his theories; and he expects her 'to understand. If eihe is not hopelessly a doll she will understand; she will enter into his interests -as far as her leisure will let her. But he goes further than this; he will even listen while she talks, understanding and entering into her interests, her plans, and her theories, and learning often to readjust his ideals from contact with her finer sense of intrinsic values.

No greater divergence from the lordhusband could.be found. Wrapped in an impenetrable mantle of complacency, the lord-husband defies the individuality of the wife; the comrade husband cherishes it a fi evidence of a strong nature refusing to be paralysed by .paralysing circumstances. He" aids and upholds her in her determination to advance and live a full life. He realises that her very love and tenderness must suffer if development be stunted.

Many factors have combined to make the new husband, the most fundamental being humanity's growing sense of justice. Another is undoubtedly the woman movement, with its attempt to waken the whole civilised world to the wrongs and needs and value of women. Through books and newspapers and magazines the new stream of thought has been slowly forcing its way, hero a trickle and there a trickle; till only those who wilfully shut their eyes can refuse to believe in its presence and its strength. The modern man, the man who reads and thinks and looks at life, cannot remain in ignorance of it. He has two courses open to him, either to ignore it, preferring to retain his easy life of careless domination, or to do what he can to remedy matters, at any rate go far as his personal relations with wonian are concerned. The woman movement, too, has helped by teaching the woman what she is and what she needs, that the world may be the better of her development. She who has been taught is at once more modest and lass meek than formerly; more modest because wider education has shown her the great distance she has yet to travel; less meek, because she has learned her value and her powers, and has a growing desire to find full use for both. She helps to educate her husband, takes her stand as a thinking, responsible human being, recognising with gratitude his generous treatment of her position till that position can be remedied. Another factor in the making of the new husband is the upgrowth of paternal feeling characteristic of recent years. The fathers of olden times desired sons as fighters or as wage-earners. Their usefulness to him was their justification for existeiLce. The new father looks on h:s children with a new eye. They are more than the defenders or supporters of his old age; they are the beings who are to carry on the progress as well as the life of the race, beings any one of whom may hold within himself some great quality which may inaugurate a new and finer development in humanity. Because of this, the chief consideration is not the child's usefulness to the parents, but the parents' usefulness to the child, their fitness for the tasks of producing and guarding and training him. It follows from this that whereas the old-time husbands asked little of their wives save a numerous offspring, the newest husband asks for those qualities which shall ensure superior offspring and their superior upbringing. Above all things, he desires this superiority of upbringing. Finding this capability in his wife, his thankfulness and admiration are unbounded. From a growing consciousness of her value both as companion and mother, rather than a mere instrument to his ease and pleasure, flow naturally an eager attention to her health and comfort, a high regard for her happiness, a sympathy with her sufferings, a determination to compensate her for the disabilities of her position, he is helpful, kindly, tender. There is one danger. In his anxiety to ensure her comfort and pleasure, he is somewhat apt to make the mistake of confounding east with happiness. Reactin"- from the undue pressure of the past, he"is a little too anxious to give her an easy time, doing too much for her or paying* others to do too much, forgetting tltat idleness is nev&r happiness, and that the

best life is only possible when the hours are filled with some loved work. Whereeve>r woman, is discouraged from talcing her full share of labour, degeneration sete in, for she becomes a parasite.