Proverbs by Josh Billings

Otago Witness, Issue 2719, 25 April 1906, Page 83

Proverbs by Josh Billings

Don'fc swop with your relashuns unless you kin afford to give them the big end of the trade. Marry young, and if circumstances require i+, often. ) If you can't eit good cloathes and <?ddication too. get the cloathes. Say how are you to everybody. Kultivate modesty, but mind and keep a good stock of impudence on hand. Bee charitable, especially at Christmas I time — threepenny bite were made on pur- . poso. I -It -costs more to borry than It does tobuy. I Ef a man flatters yu, yu can kaikerkte j he is a roge, or you are a fule. j Keep both ize open, but don't see morn j half you notis. j If you ich for fame, go into a graveyard and scratch yourself agin a tumestone. Young rran, be more anxus about tlie pedigree yur going to leave than you aie about the wun somebody's going to leave j-ou. Sin is like weeds— selfsone and sure to cum.

Two lovers, like -two, -armies," generally' •' git along until fchey-care- -engagecl.^ >,- '- / Tliat -J2oy <>' Kogers. 7 : - That -hoy o' Eogers —^Lord spare -me t _ > From- raisin' sech a brat as -he! * ■' ,') Ef 'ever-mischief -was .boiled down. - -, Into '.a freckled^-ii-ed-haired clown, " > ' And "turned loose on" two Bpzndlin' rshankt^ t T' bother mankind with -his -pranks, 'Twas that -ar . boy o' Rogers.^- , Th' want no question ,that he'd ba _ j. Inside th' penitentiary . - ' ~\ Afore le was a man full-grown. '* ' ' He cou'.d conspire more "tricks -alone Than .any boy T. ever seed, ' , - ~ ) Th' biggest scamp; we -all agreed, - v n " "Was that ar "boy o' Rogers! He turned up missin', .went out "West, s I 'low we thought ii was \h' best 1 Thing that "had a happened yit f . .-- , » ■ j For us he couldn't go too fur, • An' we all said, " Good "riddance, sir," i T that ar boy o* Rogers! j He left "us twenty years f ago; I was out West 'a* month or so • j Las' spring, an' Jack, my boy, says he, j '"I'll ,take ye' up 'to-day t' see ' "- -' i -3?he Guv'xior!" Wai, sk/Pm cussed r I knew 'him- when I seed .him-fusf, - >"• ' - * 'Twas* that ax hoy t o'- Rogers',