When Philip was Called Down.

Otago Witness, Issue 2600, 13 January 1904, Page 73

When Philip was Called Down.

The lato Captain Philip was fond of relatiug an experience- he> on^e had when he was &t3tior.-ed at the. Cramps- shipyard in Philadelphia as inspector of tho ciuiser New York, which was then building there. One day, when work was stopped for the noon hour, h>3 saw a coldierly-looking man come aboard with some ladies, and proceed io show theon about the ship with as much authority ac if he were the designer and builder. Tae soldierly man stopped beeido a couple of ventilators tvhich were lying en deck ready* to be put in place, and, touc'iincj one of them with his little cane, remarked, with an air of profound wisdom : "These are the smoke-pipes," and, approaohing the hammock ncttinps and putting out hie gloved hand, he added : "This is the place where- tv? heavy armour is put on. This is io be one of the armoured fighting chips, you krov.-." This was too much fc Captain Philip, end co he approached tho party and touched hie cap as he said : "Excuse me, sir. that is not tho place for the armour. That is a hammock) nettine, where the men stow their hammocks during the day. And these are not smolcepipc<3, but ventilators." Th 3 military man drew himself up to his greatest height and surveyed the man hi duneareee with qrlacia! ditmitv. "Excuse me." hp said, with heavy rtrnhopjon the me, "but I am Captain Blank, of thp nrmy, ci.d I think I know a smokepipe when I sco one." Captain Philip drekred thai it would have been almost a crime to take down a conceit like thai, and ho made no re-ply to the military man whatever; but turned and went about his work, leaving Captain Blank to finish explaining the intricacies ■of the cruiser to his friends. — Argonaut.