MAD AS MARCH HARES.

Otago Witness, Issue 2363, 8 June 1899, Page 55

MAD AS MARCH HARES.

PROFESIONALS' CRAZY PRANKS.

Did you sver hear of a team of wellknown footballers going on to a field in disguise? Such a trick the members of the Wigan County Club claim to have accomplished. They -were playing % Manchester

City at Manchester in the first round of the competition proper for the English Cup on January 29tk of the present year. In the team were such famous men as J. Gordon, late of Preston North End — in his day the finest right-wingei in the kingdom ; Paddy Gordon, of Liverpool ; Menham and Molyneux, of Everton ; W. Greer, of Preston North End, and other men who have won fame in the best class of football.

Now, it was quite cleai if they could keep up the disguise the dangerous men would not be so closely watched. Therefore, at their training quarters at Lytham, they went to a hairdresser's establishment, where every man was shaved, and had his hair cropped close to his scalp. The effect was extraordinary. Jack Gordon, certainly one cf the best-known figures in the football world, was positively beyond identification, and several of the others would have escaped recognition by their own mothers. Whatever may have been the direct effect of the changed appearance of the visiting side, this much is certain, the home club only won by i goal, and that 'a very lucky one Footballers are notoriously a fun-loving set of men, but nowhere is there a player more addicted to practical joking than the famous James Ross. On the first occasion that Preston North End played at Small Heath Ross led the' way on to the field. Csesar Jenkyns approached him with: "Which is Jimmy Ross, of your team?' "That's the man," replied the imperturable Jimmy, pointing at the same moment to another player. Throughout the game Jenkyns stuck like a shadow to the man he believed to be the redoubtable goal-kicker. Just before " Time " the pair had a roughish bout, and the supposed Ross exclaimed in broad Lancashire: "Here, ole lad, what arta trying on? If thou comes ony o' those games thou'd better mind thy "shins." " None of your Scotch tricks ; I know you, Jimmy Ross," replied Ctesar, with a grim chuckle. "Who arta Jimmy Ross-ingf I'm Moseo Sanders," came the astounding response. That was the fact. All through" the game the real Ross had been playing havoc with thf Small Heath defence, and Jenkyns had been galloping about alongside "of "the unconscious Moses! " The late "Nick" Ross and George Drummond once undertook to paint the grand stand- at Deepdale (Preston North End ground). After they had been engaged upon the work for some days, an official went up to see how things were progressing He saw Drummond seated on the roof of the stand singing Scotch songs .and pouring the paint out of a can down the boards, while Ross below, armed with a long brush, met the paint as, it trickled down and distributed over the space requiring paint as, much of that fluid as did not float past his broom. *' ' A certain team, when away on a tour, decided to play a joke upon their local paper, and despatched a telegram stating that the team had been boating on & wellknown loch and had been capsized. Readers were left tc imagine all sorts of different things. The whole thing was a hoax ; and when the conspirators returned to town they received sc salutary a lesson that they failed to see wherein lay the fun they had planned. Horseplay in football practice is frequently attended by serious consequences. In August of last year Derby County, Everton, Aston Villa, Preston North End, and Notts Forest each had men 'disabled while preparations for the opening of the season were in progress. Those club executives who believe in ser-ding theii team to a town overnight are not always well advised in doing so. Many are the occasions when the players, who should be resting quietly in bed, are racing about the house, engaging in fierce pillow fights, steeplechasing down balustiades, and, in fact, doing everything but occupying their beds.