The Boss-em-AllS. TO THE EDITOR.

Otago Witness, Issue 2323, 8 September 1898, Page 45

The Boss-em-AllS. TO THE EDITOR.

Sir, — I have had a dream which may possibly interest your readers. Methought I stood, an unseen observer, in the meeting room of the Worshipful Company of Boss-em-Alls, and overheard the following conversation : — The Secretary: " Here is a letter from Mr Currish, in which he refuses to obey your orders because they are illegal." "The Rev. Pecksniff: "What impudence! " The Secretary: "He further slates these illegal orders were sent to him chiefly at the instigation of the Rev. Mr Pecksniff, who was actuated by a spirit of malice." The Rev. Mr Pecksniff : " Let's give the fellow three months' notice ! " The Hon. J. Mac Alpine: "Nonsense! " The Rev. Mr Pecksniff: "What! He refuses to obey orders which we agreed upon unanimously ' ' The Hon J. Mac Alpine: "We were not unanimous." The Rev. Mr Pecksniff : "I pay we were." The Hon. J. Mac Alpine: "You're a liar! " Tho Chairman : IC Order, gentlemen. Really, Mr Pecksniff, I distinctly remember that we were not unanimous." Chorus of Members : " No, we were not unanimous. We never are ! " The Rev. Mr Pecksinff : " Has it then come to this? I, a Boss-em-All, and a reverend Bcss-'em-All at that, first to be flouted by a subordinate, by one of my own servants, and then, because I wish to punish the fellow with dismissal I am sat upon by all the other Boss- ' em-Alls ! I won't stand it ! I'll resign from all the committees lam on. I'll resign from the Committee of Back-stairs Influence, from the Committee of Wirepullers, from the Committee of " Chorus of Members: "Keep your hair on! Nobody wants you to resign." The Rev. Mr Pecksniff : " I tell you I will resign ! I'll resign everything ! So now see if you can get along without me." A Member: "Look here. Currish says we arc acting illegally. Possibly we are. Then, if \.e insist, we make asses of ourselves " A Voice: " We have done that already." The Member (continuing) : " Therefore I mo\o that we take legal advice before committing ourselves any further." Another Member: "I second that. What 'do you say, Mr Pecksniff? " The Rev. Mr Pecksniff: "Don't ask me. I'm sulking." The motion was then put and carried, all the members voting except the Rev. Mr Pecksniff, who was sulking. The Chairman (aside) : "We ought to have done this at fir3l." The Hon. J. Mac Alpine (aside) : " All this -bother is through that fellow Pecksniff ! " The Rev. Mr Pecksniff (aside): "All this bother is through that fellow Currish. But I'll pay him out yet, sse if I don't ! " Hereupon methought the rev. gentleman kicked me violently, and starting, I awoke, and behold ! it was a dream. — I am, etc., August 31. Southland.

The hospital returns for the past week are : Remaining from previous week, 94- ; admitted during the week, 30: discharged, 17; deaths (Charles Merwin and Tong Tie), 2; total remaining in the institution, 105.

The Hon. J.