PASSING NOTES.

Otago Witness, Issue 2200, 30 April 1896, Page 38

PASSING NOTES.

Feom that mild form of dissipation known as the ohuroh bazaar we are happily almost free in this colony, our paternal Government having deoreed that games of chance, even where the proceeds are to be devoted to the furtherance of church work, come under tbe ban of the Gaming and Lotteries Act. Nor have those who formerly profited by the employment of alluring young females," whose task It was to extort the tardy shilling from susceptible youth and not less impressionable age, as yet found a satisfactory substitute. Gift auctions pall quickly on the taste; sales of work interest only one section of one sex, and that section not at all auriferous; services of song are but weak imitations of oratorios; and gigantic carnivals must from their magnitude necessarily be infrequent. There is, therefore, a decided opening for originality. To suoh at are desirous of drawing up " a programme of ingenious devices for obtaining money under false pretences," I would recommend a perusal of the Rev. Mr Halo's article in the "Forum" of January. He notes tbat In America the lottery has almost disappeared from church entertainments, . but that the Roman Catholics retain it. "The selling of kisses has been entirely discountenanced by growing discernment of the proprietors." But in their place have come other forms of entertainment. For instance (I am quoting per favour of Mr Stead), the local press thus speaks of the presentation of 11 The Mikado " by the choir of the Ohuroh of the Epiphany, at Winchester, Mass. : —

Fish Iwih, by the leader of the Church oE tbe" Epiphsny ohoir, was a moat happy impersonation. Nanki Poo, in his cream tights, made life indescribably sunny for Yum Yum. The Mikado himself, a Calumet Club end man, delighted all with bis happy local hita. In short, the Church of the Epiphany, ai the producer of light operatic diversion, has crowned itself with glory. Another .church, " with a single eye to the glory of God," gave a female negro minstrel show. Another "went one better" than this by introducing a song and dance turn, an impersonation of the Bowery gfrl, and & skirt dance. At a third, and at the regular hoar* for divine worship on Sunday, a sale of email pictures was conducted. The pastor cold the goods, and the communion table was turned into an auctioneer's stand. The payments were made and tbe goods delivered on the spot. Who shall say the poaaibilities of church entertainments have been exhausted 1 Though I should be tbe first to deprecate anything savouring of secrecy, I am strongly of opinion that ecclesiastical interests would have been more advantageously furthered by the discussion "anent" Mr Ash's "translation " from Bavensbourne to the Buff being taken in committee of the presbytery. Wbare duty and interest clash— or have even only the appearance of clashing—it is not easy to avoid giving occasion for scandal — scandal in its strictly theological sense. The marital bond between Mr Ash and Bavensbourne ought to have been held to be indissoluble. The peoplt took him, as it were, off the grass, when he was peacefully feeding — but not, alas, by still waters — under the shadow of the Loan and Mercantile Agency Company. As their acquaintance grew- closer he became, first a missionary (which seems to imply an unwarrantable reflection on the residents of the marine suburb), then a probationer, acd finally a fully developed inmate of the clerical fold ; and they did thin, according to Mr Ash, at great personal sacrifice. " They are contributing," he cays, "about twice as much per member as the members of our largest Dunedia churches contribute," and what greater proof of sincerity could bt desired f The church at B-tvensbourne has thus evidently two props — the Rev. Mr Ash and tbe congregation. If the effect of the call Is to withdraw one prop — thai is, Mr Ash— the result will be that the other prop will fall ; th« congregation will b» swallowed np 1 Attttag .&• BKdtlplioity of «nall ohnxehM

that Ravonsbourne fa *oarsed* with—' vide Mr Aeh's remarks. !But Mr Ash reflects, on tbe other band, on his duty to himself. Bluff offers a secure salary and a possibly increasing congregation ; at Ravens- V 'bourne the " dividend " is eked out by a subsidy from the presbytery, and the probability exists of Mr Ash being " permitted " to work overtime on the Outloek. The whole discussion is distasteful. Such personal matters are best discussed privately. The congregation at the BlufE is to blamo, however, for it all. Perhaps we must impute this to their latitude, -as they eojoy the distinction of being nearer to the South Pole than any other congregation — unless, indeed, one h»s been formed at the Falkland Islands under the new arrangement by which a Government inspector is located there, — arid they deserve the rebuff their wonld-be piratical action has earned. They seem to think they can catch ministers as their fathers caught whales— by simply harpoon r ing tbe first one that spouts in their vicinity. A nameless correspondent -send* me the following-letter, which speaks for itself :— Dear Civis, — I notice in the "Review of Reviews " for la^fc mouth an article by the Rev. Rutherford Waddell on " Sporb in BlaoriUnd," wherein he publishes come of bis experiences as an angler, acd records with great apparent complacency the fact that at the end of two and a-half days' sport at Temuka he returned to Dunedin with a basket of 39 fish. I wonder if the rt,v. gentleman has ever read Leigh Hunt's clever little essay on " Angling/ As he may not have read it, let me quote the following passage for his careful consideration before he Bets out ou his next fisbiog excursion. "Death," saya the essayist, "is common to all; and a trout speedily killed by a man may suffer no worse fate than from the jaws of a pike. It is the mode — the lingering, cat-like cruelty of the angler's sport; thfvfc renders it unworthy. We should like to know wh\fc these j grave divines, who were anglers, would h&ve said to the heavenly maxim of 'Do as yon would be done by.' Let us imsgine oursalves a sort of human fish. Air is but a rarer fluid, and at present in this November weather a supernatural being who should look down upon us from a higher atmonphere would have some reason to regard v; as a kind of pedestrian carp* Now, fancy a Genius fishing For us. Fancy him baiting a great hook with pickled salmon, and twitching up old Istaak Walton from the. banks of the River Lee, with the hook through hii ear. How he would go up, roaring aud screaming, and thinking the devil had got him ! " With your leave, Sir, I would say to I our reverend tnglet—mutato nomine de tefabula narratur /and when you are landing your uext trout just imagine that great hook the essayist ! speaks of to be through your own ear iuetead of old Izaak Walton's. Now. I think my unknown correspondent is " rather rough " on the Rev. Mr Waddell. It is quite evident that Mr Waddell enjoys the sport of killing trout, and there is no evidence that the trout object -to being killed by' Mr Waddell with hie rod and line — in fact, for all we know the trout may actually enjoy it. As Leigh Hunt tells us, trout are mortal as well as parsons, and in fact may better die fighting with a hook through their gills than languish out a miserable old age beneath some moss-grown snag in a damp river bed.' Sinoe I received the above letter- 1 have glanced through Mr Waidtll's artiole, and I find that the reverend fisherman, after proudly chronicling the number of fish he killed at Temuka, significantly adds of the 39 fish (not articles), " they all died game." This goes in some measure to support my theory that the trout themselves may enjoy the sport of being angled for. I notice Mr Waddeil does not, in the artiole in question, take the British public into his confidenoe regarding his exploit?, .or those of his fellows of the clotb, with the gun. There is an old story — it may only be a fable— about two reverend gentlemen from Dunedin astonishing the natives down at Catlins by shooting pigeons in close time — or was it on the Sawbath ? I forget the exact details of the story ; perhaps, indeed, they were never published. 'It is to be trusted that Mr Waddell has had no such experience as that in his enthusiastic pursuit of tbe wild duck. As regards angling, however, I believe in " the contemplative man's recreaticm," and I think that a grave divine may be all tbe better fitted for fishing for men on Sundays if he goes a-ibbiDg for trout through the week. Mr Soobie Macketzie is in manyTeapectsa moet remarkable man. He is a colonist of many part*, and is, in no e-vil aence, " all things to all men." It seems but the other day that he was holdirjg forth to tha Barns Club on Burns, and now we have him gravely addressing the Shakespeare Club on SU^kospeare. Nothing seems to come amiss to him. He is equally at home chaffing a crowd of colliers at E^itangata, or lecturing to the students of our local university on "Bio--quence." I suppose that daring the next few months political leaders andaspiranUboth will be exercising their gifts of charming on many platforms throughout the colony. No doubt in time we shall be favoured with visits from the political chiefs now touring in the North Island. Bnt few of them, however, are as humorous or versatile as our own Scobie. It would come as a shock to the most hardened amongst us, for example, to hear of Mr Ssddon addressing a convention of prohibitionist?, or of Sir Robert Stout occupying the pulpit of First Church during the temporary absence of Mr Gibb on a shooting expedition. However^ strange and unexpected things often happen prior to a general election, and I look forward with pleased expsctanoy to the floods of eloquence I hope to hear in Dunedin between now and next November. Much oheap wit has been expended upon the ladies who spend hoars in the drapers 1 shops, and after causing tbe assistant to display the whole of bis stock for their delectation, coolly buy a reel of cotton, and order it to be sent home. A man, it is said, knows exactly what he wants, asks for it, gets it, and goes away. Bat I would ask what man ever yet made a purchase in this off-hand way that was regarded at satisfactory lay his womankind 1 Besides, a man takes no pleaBare in toe contemplation of such things. Perhaps he has read " Sartor Resartui," and knows exactly the relation between the tegumentary covering and the body and mind within. Bat a woman i takes a flensaoos dclleht in fcha textaca and colour©! dieso.

In other jfotmfl of animal Ufa it is the ms!« who haf the biffliaat ooloura and the magnfr ficeat plumage. From the lordly Hob down to the barnyard rooatei Nature's arrangements we plain.- Bat with as it it different. ■ Tha females are rapidly preponderating snd are simply pbeying a natural law wbc-u they deck themselTea out to make themselves worthy of selection. Involuntary actions are as a rale the frait of heredity. The dog tarns himself round a number of times before lying down, although he haß no longer any occasion to trample the herbage fkt to make a comfortable bed. So women aot. from heredity when they dally amaug vestures and toy with lacss and ribbons. For want of better occupation they will even toy with blanket*, as the following veracious story shows : — One of the sex' in a drapes'* shop expressed a desire to be shown some blankets. The assistant of course politely complied, and the counter was soon covered with piles of blankets of -all qualities and oolouw. Whan the assistant had to admit that fee -bad arrived at the end of hi* stock, the lady politely remarked that-it did not matter ; she was only waiting to see a friend. The assistant, without abating one jot -of respect in his manner, then said, " Madam, if you think your friend is among those blankets, I will gladly turn them over again." The lady left indignantly, and has never been sesn near that shop again. About a month ago it was my lot to be present at a celebration of the anniversary of the patron saint of Ireland, Readers will judge from this that I allude to the 17th of March, and lest they shonld be disposed to Buspeot that the day was celebrated in the traditional manner, with the traditional con* sequences, I hasten to add that the festivity was under the patronage and management of the "clargy," so tbat there wasn't; even a dance afterwards. We all meekly and soberly went home through the darkened streets, feeling somewhat guilty at being out at what seemed, but what was not actually, ■0 late an hour. On that occasion I overheard a criticism of the colour of the hang* ings on the stage, and disappointment was audibly expressed because they were not the correct shade of green ; they were cot emerald green, but green of a much paler hue. ' Daring tbe evening Mr Farquhar Young sang " The wearing of the green," and the bursts of applause which greeted every comparison between the green and England's cruel (only the singer tempered it to " royal ") red, made the very rafters shake. This led me to reflect on the intimate connection looally established between Catholicism and ' Ireland. I have often thought that the Catholics who are not Irish mast have frequently felt themselves somewhat outsiders at Bt. Joseph's. On St. PAtrick'a Day every . Irishman worthy of the name — that is, every Oatholio Irishman — was, as usual, distinguished by his bit of green in his buttonhole, ' and thrice happy he who could sport his real sprig of shamrock. It is somewhat disappointing to learn that all' this poetry about the Green Isle, the green shamrock, and tha green sod should be held to imply that the national emblem is green. It is only those who enthuse who are that ; for it Is said on good authority that Ireland's colour is blue. Oiviq.