HOW ONE MISTRESS MANAGES,

Otago Witness, Issue 1898, 19 June 1890, Page 37

HOW ONE MISTRESS MANAGES,

Deab Alice, — In the Witness of May 15 you invite further remarks on th servant

question. I therefore take up my pen to make a few, as I have given the subject some consideration.

First, I must tell you that I have been in this country little over five years, and before coming here I had the control, and management of my mother's household in the Home Country, she being an invalid. Beiug a very small family we usually only kept a manservant and two maidservants, sometimes three, but always had first-class, welltaught servants, who knew their work and had been in good places. I took a pride and pleasure in my housekeeping— attending to every little thing, and keeping accounts and supervising tradesmen's bills. We had mar y visitors and kept much company, which added to the work of housekeeping, so I have Borne experience in the matter.

I was told before coming to New Zealand that the incompetence of servants was one of the great trials in colonial life; therefore I was prepared for the worst, and, moreover, a general servant was. an article quite new to me, having never had anything to do with a maid of all work before. But my experience now is that most of them can be taught and cultivated to a great extent, at least in their work. The greatest difficulty is their manners, which with some of them, even nice good girls, are perfectly hopeless. This teaching is a great trouble, but it is the only way if work is to be properly done.

But there are two classes of servants that there is no use trying to teach : one is the kind that has been much in country hotels, and the other those who think themselves above service and only go out to gain money to dress themselves. I had an experience of those two at one time, and my home was most uncomfortable. The general servant had been in hotels, and consequently the work was hurried through as badly as possible, the cooking was abominable, every dish was spoiled by her method of preparing it so as to give least work, and the result was she had so much spare time with me that she was always idling about, grumbling if she did not get to every ball and picnic; the kitchen was always full of men visitors, and noihing was properly done. She thought it such an easy place after being in hotels that she would not rise in the morning. As I was not strong at the time I did not send her away, but I learnt a lesson, and have carefully eschewed hotel servants ever since. The nurse I had at the same time was an example of the other class. Her mother lived near Invercargill and gave out to her friends that her daughter was paying visits in the country, not in service at all. This girl's one idea was dress and men. Being an invalid myself when she first came, I did not know her real character. She was fair to my face but really ill-used my children. She did almost no work or sewing of any kind, but joined with the other one and devoted herself to men ; but she was never even engaged, the men thought so little of her. As soon as I was stronger and better I determined to improve things. I got rid of those servants, and resolved never to have either a hotel servant or the other kind again. I went back to my old Home ways of housekeeping and have been quite successful. I now get about four times as much work done, the servants rise e&ily, I am never troubled with men visitors, there is not a constant asking to go to balls and picnics, and they are perfactly happy and contented. One girl said she would never get such a place again, and that if she went back to her own home she would have far harder work than with me. The following is my method : I keep two servants — namely, a general and a nurse. Ido very little work myself, but thoroughly superintend both of them. I have a paper nailed up in the kitchen with the whole of the work planned and written out for each day, the time for rising and going to bed, and also the general rules of my household; ditto in the nursery. When a servant applies for the place I have simply to show her this and ask her if she is competent to do the work and if she will conform to the rules. I state the wages and also make the bargain that if her ways of doing her work are not the same as mine she will be willing to fall in with mine. I can see in the course of a week if the girl is likely to learn my ways; if she is not I get rid of her as soon as possible. I may say there have only been three thoroughly incompetent girls that I have sent off on short notice. I have had nine general servants since I came to New Zealand, more than five years ago ; the present one is the tenth. My place is thought a very good one, and eagerly sought after when a vacancy occurs, because it is well known that lam thoroughly just to my servants. 1 never overwork them or ask them to do more than is at first specified. I look to their comfort ; that they aie warmly housed, and comfortably fed ; I never stint them, but 1 allow no waste ; and I keep strictly to my rules. I am always ready if there is any stress of work to help to fill up the gap myself, thereby showing them that there is none of their work I would not do myself, if necessary. A naval officer once said to me, " The sailors will always be most ready to obey an officer who is not afraid to dip" his own hand in. the tar bucket " ; and the right management of servants is exactly the same as that of a ship's crew on a small scale. Give them their specified work and keep them steadily to it is the sure way to avoid grumbling. It is also like good horsemanship— keep a light but steady hand, so that you can feel your horse's mouth, but don't irritate him. The great thiDgs to be aimed at are discipline and a mutual good feeling, which is the foundation of a feeling of attachment. Take an interest in your servant's personal history, and in their joys and sorrows ; be oareful to keep them from bad company and getting into mischief, but give them a treat and a pleasure when you can do so consistent with discipline. If you overwork them and bring on ill health, it should be a life-long remorse to you as their good health is their capital.

I have had servants very much attached to me out here, and 1 have also had two that ran away, but thesi were exceptional cases, as one was a child of 15 who was decoyed away by a sister in town, and the other was by way of being converted, and got so excited she could not do anything quietly or rationally. But my place was as eagerly sought after then as on other occasions.

TUB OTHER SIDE OF THE QUESTION. Now I must make a few remarks on

"Biddy's " letter. First of all I deny that domestic service is despised, for at Home a highclass upper servant is far above a barmaid or shop girl. Then as for education — although a little may make a servant do her work more thoughtfully or tidily, yet there is no doubt that too much ruins a girl for domestic work: it only makes her discontented. The education of the ordinary board schools is quite enough for domestic servants. A girl with a Sixth Standard certificate will make a far better servant than one who is accomplished in music and painting and foreign languages ; that is my experience at Home, and it must be the same here. The best and kindest and dearest old nurse I had when a child could barely write her name, yet Bhe was sharp as a needle and never forgot a thing, and was a perfect treasure in sickness, travelling, or any emergency ; and the cook who made the most tasty dishes and could send up a perfect dinner of the usual seven courses could barely spell or do an addition sum, and yet what charmingly nice respectful manners they had I Now they so thoroughly knew their own place instead of the rough, untaught ways of the young colonial. Let " Biddy " and others weigh the question fairly. A domestic servant has no cares ; she is certain of her food and shelter, and her wages for dress without taking any more thought for them than a child ; and she has no calculations to make ends meet or pay rent. On the other hand she muet give up her freedom, and make herself obliging and agreeable. Ido not know what Biddy or Mary mean by comfortless kitchens. My two servants are most comfortable in the evenings, in a warm kitchen, chatting to each other and sewing or mending, the general servant doing her own sewing and the nurse sewing for my children. As for mixing with their master and mistress, they would look upon an evening spent that way as a decided penance, as they could not have their own little jokes and bits of gossip. As for long hours, I am afraid Biddy is lazy. My servants rise at 6, and are far more contented than the lazy ones who could hardly be got up at 7 ; and if work is properly arranged it muse be done early in the morning. It is only slatterns who are washing or scrubbing in the afternoon. It would do *• Biddy " a great deal of good to be under a first-rate housekeeper at Home, and then she would know how housework really is done, if done properly. The remainder of " Biddy's " letter, I can only say, proves her to have all the ideas of those servants who are always grumbling, and from my experience are very, very untaught and incompetent. The good ones never dream of halfholidays. " Mary," in to-day's Witness, must be the same stamp of servant — an incompetent one, who has only been in the very worst places. If her mistress and she had a mutual friend in Mrs Blank, it is clear that her mistress belonged to the same class in society as herself, and that class, such as barmaids and shopgirls who have married men able to give them servants, are the kind who over- work and ill-treat them. It is well-known that the most intolerable mistresses are those who have been servants themselves. If " Mary " did her work well so as to get into a situation in a gentleman's house she could not be "insulted in her lonely kitchen byhei master ; " and as for going out after 10 p.m., I think that is nonsense, for any respectable household would make the rule that the servants were to be in by 10 and go to bed then. It has always been my rule and that of my friends. I never heard of a servant being asked to work after she came home. They are usually so dressed up that it would not be possible. I am sorry to say I do not think colonial ladies are fitted to teach work — I mean those who have been born and brought up in this country and have never seen domestic work done properlj by a trained staff of domestics at Home. Having only been five years out here, however, I cannot say much on that subject, but it is my opinion that this will all mend as time goes on and the colony becomes older. The hundreds of girls in the new generation of the working classes will want employment, and there will be no lack of applicants for domestic service. Wages will fall, rich people will keep more of them, so that there will be a demand for underservants, who will be gradually trained by the upper ones ; the bad ones will go to the wall, and the good ones try to improve to obtain the best places. At present even the best only take a plage till they get married. It is almost impossible to get an experienced middle-aged servant, but when the proportion hetween men and women is more equal that will not be the case. On the other hand mistresses will become more exDerienced in managing servants. Allow me to remark that the friend you mentioned in to-day's Witness could have had no idea how to manage a servant or to arrange her work; the very idea of dabbling in wash tubs on a damp, foggy, raw afternoon was preposterous. And it always seems to me so utterly inconsistent and out of place to have luxuriously furnished rooms, and only one maid- of -all-work to do everything. If people ■jwould spend less on furniture and dress, and have their houses properly cleaned and their unfortunate babies properly looked after by more servants, they would all be more really comfortable in every way ; but it all comes from a love of show, and apeing to be what one is not ; it is the curse of the country, and the cause of debt and bankruptcy. As for "Mary" talking of a servants' Union, that would be an end to real domestic servants. They would all in a sense be only \ charwomen*- out for the day. It would do away with all the comfort of home. You ; could not send them for a doctor, or have a visitor arrive late to stay with you and dare to give him any supper. It would be as absurd aa if mothers made a union only to attend to fractious infants within certain hours. But let us be thankful there are plenty better servants in the country than ■" Mary's " and " Biddy's," and ere long there will be even more, for the mantle of civilisation is fast falling on us. Ihe Exhibition has helped it; the colonial wife who can only talk of kerosene washing, and the maid-of-all-work will alike ere long be a thing of the past, and we can even now see dimly in the distance a vista of a troup of neat and plainly-robed domestics bearing on their heads fresh little muslin «aps, and lisping "sir" and "ma'am" in the gentlest and meekest oi voices.— Yours, &&of. f Mates-

pamilias, or the mainspring of the Household.