A Good Actor After All.

Otago Witness, Issue 1974, 19 September 1889, Page 38

A Good Actor After All.

Scene in a dramatic agent's office. Agent : " I decline to talk to you to-day, Mr Topheavy ; you have been drinking." Topheavy : "You're mishtaken — hie— wash cever more sober — hie — in all my life."

Agent : " Then you are what I never took you to be before."

Topheavy : '• Wbat'sh that 1 " Agent : " A good aefcor."

Railway Travelling in New Zealand. Scene : A country railway station in New Zealand.

Time : 8.25 ; train advertised to leave at 8.15.

Character slowly saunters up. Speculations amongst bystanders as to how long he will take in arriving. One offers to bet he will arrive in time for breakfast to-morrow. Intense laughter at the facetious man. Couldn't see much joke myself, but was obliged to laugh to keep the others company. Before excitement caused by joke has quite subsided.the Character arrives. Someone suggests he had better get a ticket. Character says, " 'Dunno so much about that. What do I want with a ticket ? and where do I get one?" A porter kindly directs him. Station master asks him where he's bound for. Character names a place. S. M. mildly remarks that this train doesn't travel o'er the briny ocean to place lie describes, and that he had better take a steamer. It seems Character was rather mixed. However, with help of sympathising bystanders, they get him booked for somewhere. He seems quite content, only persists in endeavouring to enter iirst-class carriage ; states he's a first-class man, &c. After considerable moral and physical persuasion, the latter predominating (I see the railway official can in emergency occasionally exert itself), they induce him to enter guard's van. Exit Character. N.B. — Train very kindly waits all this time.