He Isn't There Now.

Otago Witness, Issue 1796, 24 April 1886, Page 28

He Isn't There Now.

One of those friendly, good-natured fellows whom you don't wish to offend, and yet whom you detest because they bore you, attached himself to a Detroit insurance agent some months ago. He was not only asking for a loan every few days, with no idea of ever paying it back, but he spent several hours each day at the office, and became in time so much at home that he used the office stationery and stamps, and tendered his advice on all important matters. The other day he was asked to mind the office while the agent went out, and he had just opened a new box of cigars to have a smoke when a stranger entered and brusquely said, " Sea here, Blank, I want that money." " You'll have to call again," replied the bore as he looked up from his newspaper. " I'll be blanked if I do ! That money was due a month ago, and I won't be put off any longer." " Come in at 11 o'clock." " I won't do it." it m ! Well, Blank isn't in, as you see." „ ." J°u are a liar. You are Blank, or else I'm DUnd.and I think my eyes are good yet. Come " JkaUy. sir, but " «, £"°; m - c d °wn." " But, sir »

The stranger reached out for the bore and flopped him on the floor. Then he jerked him to his feet and slammed him over a table. Then he shook him until both suspenders gave way, and the pegs in his boots were loosened. Then he jambed his head through the map of Michigan, and kicked him with a boot manufactured in Michigan, and finally flung him in a heap, and walked out with the remark, " I'll repeat that dose every day in the future until you pay that bill." The bore doesn't hang out in that office any more. When the agent returned and found him lying half dead on a box of ink-blotters and fire insurance statistics he didn't seem to extend the sympathy demanded by the occasion. Indeed, his cold and unfeeling conduct rather led the bore to suspect that a cold-blooded plot had been laid to deprive him of his valuable life. — Detroit Freo Press.