Passing Notes.

Otago Witness, Issue 1596, 24 June 1882, Page 18

Passin g Notes.

Signor Otto Hiig, who now describes himself as a " Suisse Clairvoyant and Phiscopathist," announces that he will leave Dunedin on June 27th. What, in the name of Edipus, is a " phiscopasthist ? " The other mysteries with which Signor Hiig surrounds himself are not altogether inscrutable, but I confess that "phiscopasthist" fairly beats ;me. There is' no mundane language to which "phiscopathist " can be affiliated. Perhaps that is as it ought to be. The terminology "of the occult sciences is naturally drawn from the unknown tongues. Nevertheless the public is entitled to an interpretation. Will Signor Hiig kindly interpret ? He may have cogent private reasons for ignoring my suggestion that he should submit his clairvoyant powers to an intelligible test ; but there could hardly be any harm in telling us, before leaving on the 27th, what he means by " phiscopasthist." Furthermore — if one may put the question without seeming to pry impertinently into the Signor's personal affairs— Why is he leaving us on the 27th ? As everybody is aware, Signor Hiig Jheals the sick by faith, and diagnoses upon mere examination of a lock of hair, or by clairvoyant inspection of the patient's interior. Is the field for these singular gifts exhausted? There are plenty of sick people in Dunedin still, and if even Signor Hiig had healed them all, the rest of us will some day or other fall sick and want healing in our turn. Why does the Professor desert us ? The regular practitioners live and thrive in dozens ; if Signor Hiig does the things he professes to do he may make an income equal to that of any five of them. Dunedin, in short, is a mine of wealth, yet our Suisse clairvoyant throws up his claim and departs for other diggings ! Are the fees falling off ? Point d'argent point de Suisse 1 That can hardly be the case already. Whatever the explanation of the fact, it is certain that gentlemen of Mr Hiig's profession seldom stay long in one place. They move on as persistently as an opera company or a circus troupe. The regular practitioner takes root; the irregular practitioner dazzles for a time, then folds his tent like the Arabs, and silently steals away. The fact is peculiar, but the fact is so.

I learn with pleasure that an enthusiastio admirer of Professor Hug's is prepared to take up the challenge which that gentleman declines. "Veritas" writes to the Times that, "if his health permits," he will read writing enclosed in a sealed envelope. There are to be "certain conditions" submitted to the editor of the Witness — "jconditions which will in every way be found convenient to the challenger and of little trouble to myself, and which will also prevent the possibilities of a charge of collusion." Thus "Veritas," whose courage merits and obtains my cordial approbation. I shall be delighted to see this miracle done, and to acknowledge it when it is done. Let ' 'Veritas" come on with his " conditions." If it will simplify the business on his side, or better suit his Btate of health, he may take the sealed envelope home and keep it for a week. If he returns it unopened, together with a copy of its contents, I will no longer accuse the Hugites of credulity, and they shall have no further reason to lament my unbelief.

I have often remarked upon the gentle dullness of my Freethought friends, and I used to think them quite hopeless in this respect. Judge then of my surprise when, the other day, I found a little bit of pleasantry in a document emanating from this Association. Their petition against Bible-reading in Schools sets forth, amongst other things, " that hitherto the reading of the Bible has, in the opinion of your honourable House, not sufficed to make good citizens, as the passing of the West Coast Peace Preservation Bill shows." I confess I was in the middle of the next clause before I saw the joke, and I may say that I'm not particularly Scotch, but when the truth dawned on my mind, I was above measure delighted. For had not I bestowed no end. of pains on this part of their education ? and now I seem to behold the reward of my labours, or at least the promise of such. Our recent distinguished visitors, Te Whiti and Tohu, hints the Freethought petition, were diligent readers of the Bible, and yet the House has just passed a Bill to keep them and their followers in order ; ergo, the reading of the Bible in schools would be of no service to the rising generation of New Zealanders. The argument is, of course, no argument at all. But the Freethoughters did not mean logic this time ; or if they did, it was the logic of irony or sarcasm. And, as I havo just said, I am delighted to think they are at last emerging from their humourless condition. I cannot, indeed, congratulate them either on the quality or quantity of their joke ; for it is so small as to be scarce discernible to the naked eye ; and even if the House should happen to perceive it, I suspect the laugher excited by it will not be of the inextinguishable sort. But it is a beginning, and for once I am happy to be able to say to my Freethought compatriots, Go on, and prosper !

Among other forms of local industry which the enterprising promoters of the New Zealand Exhibition at Christchurch are endeavouring to encourage is the important one of the dressing of dolls. A doll show is to be held, at which various prizes will be given for "National Costume," " Historical Costume," " Trade Costume," " Bridal Costume," "Walking Costume," "Groups," and " Babies." Now here is a grand educational opportunity for the young misses of our schools. When they come to " make up " national and historical costumes they will of course have to use research (or get some one to do it for them), and in dressing Cardinal Wolsey or Napoleon Buonaparte may be induced to learn something more about them than ihoy knew before. Similarly Spanish, TurkUh, or Russian costuniuo may bo made the means of furbishing up their geography, and even the babies may afford a text for a lecture on infant hygeine. Then there are the trades, the

typical butcher and the typical baker. Why, the field of information that opens up in the dressing of such dolls as these is immense. I am not sure that it won't create a revolution in our modes of teaching, and combine work and play in the most happy manner. The doll to most little lassies is a real living thing and if dolls could only be made to personate real historical characters, or types of charac ters, what easy lessons might be given on very dry subjects. Unfortunately so many historical characters are horribly wicked, and it would be hard indeed to depict a Mary Queen of Scots or a Harry the Eighth in their historical characters without shocking the parental affection of their owners. All dolls are, I believe, supposed by their little mistresses to be good, or if occasionally in disgrace, are only so for a brief period, but how could a maiden of six take to her heart a counterfeit presentment of Richard 111, or of the "bloody Mary," knowing all about them. This is a difficulty; however, I daresay it is only one of detail, and perhaps it might be overcome by selecting only the good characters of history— 'they are certainly fewer in num. ber. The footnote to the advertisement of this Doll Show is suggestive of the nationality of its composer. It says, "National costumes need no explanation, inasmuch as it embraces all nationalities of past and present age— -from a Scotch Highlander down to a Maori chief^M Now* isn't this rather rough on the li&Borir+ chief? If the Scotch Highlander mwjJbepui at the top of the scale, I don't quite see why the Maori should be put at the bottom, I think it was Macaulay who remarked on the Highland costume, so much prized now-a-days, as having been, only a hundred years ago, the" distinguishing badge of a cattle stealer. lam inclined to think that many a Maori chief is about as much of a gentleman as a Macgregor or a MaoAllister of those days. But with a Highlander at the top and a Maori at the bottom, what comes between? AH the same I think I shall visit that Doll Show with Mrs Oivis and all the little Civises.

Some incredulous people disbelieve the funny extracts from examination papers with which examiners occasionally favour us. When they read that Newton shot the apple off his son's head, that Achilles was killed by Hannibal, for which the eyes of the latter were put out by Queen Ophthalmia, that an hypothesis is an instrument for drawing up water, or something that happens to people after death, they suspect the examiner or the newspaper man of abusing their simplicity. These pleasant absurdities are invented to amuse. Yet anybody who has laboured in cultivating the mind of ingenuous youth knows that schoolboy stupidity is capable of even greater things than these. Most Sunday Bcbool teachers have a budget of similar experiences. The following is extracted from a review of the Memorials of Caroline Fox: —

Once she tried to do good to a little girl in her brother's service, so asked her, after many unsuccessful questions, if the had not heard of the Lord's coming into the world ? " Why," Bhe Baid, " I may have done so, but I have forgot it." "But surely you must h •.; c heard your master read about it, and heard of it <.c school, and church, and chapel." " Very likely I have," she said placidly, " but it has quite slipped my memory!" A teacher at the Sunday school takes most patient pains with an endlessly stupid little girl who meekly and respectfully answers to the simplest questions. "[Who did Adam and Eve \sin against when they ate the fruit?' •• Their parents and friends, ma'am !" " Were Adam and Eve happy when they left Ihe garden? 1 "Holy and happy ma'am." Miss Fox exhibits in her own person some curiosities of belief, and probably would not have come out particularly well if subjected to the torture of an examination paper. She relates a conversation with Professor Owen, in which the Professor, as she supposes, told her that " the Dutch used to call at New Zealand to lay in a stock of dodo ; that the poor natives used to eat them, and that it was because of the scarcity produced by the Dutch demand that tho Maoris were reduced to feeding on each other!" Miss Fox has evidently mixed up the dodo and the moa, but Dr Haast will be surprised to learn, on the authority of Professor Owen, that the Dutch as well as the Maoris were moa-eaters. A charming example of schoolboy cleverness came under my own. notice the other day. A sentence from Smith's Principia, " the soldier fights that he may save his country "—contained, as it appeared when translated into Latin, the astounding statement that the soldier fights "ut servet , urn." " Rum I" shrieked the teacher,—" and what on earth is rum?" "The accusative of rus, the country" replied the scholar. (Sotto voce, and in the strict privacy of a parenthesis, I may explain to my fair readers that rus is the " country " as opposed to the town, not the "country" for which soldiers fight— which is patria, and that the accusative of rvx is not rum,, but rurem). This young hopeful, who thought that soldiers fought to save their rum, has also some original ideas on the subject of etymology. Asked to name an English derivative from loquor, to speak, he at once gave "lock-jaw," because, as he subsequently explained, in lock-jaw you can't speak ! V< My business or amusement, as everybody knows, is to shoot folly on the wing. Ido not pretend to be wise. I could no more preach a sermon, write a leading article, or hold forth from a stump, than I could fly. These things are far above mo. But, nevertheless, like Mr Fish, lam no idiot. At least, I flatter myself that I have somewhat of an eye for the ludicrous, and I have aa much philanthrophy a*s to laugh at the foibles and follies of my fellowcreatures — for their good. lam sure I use the subjects of my Rabelaisian quill as if I loved them; though there are, occasionally, little misunderstandings on their part. Here, for instance, is a letter which I have just received from an indignant female, in reference to one of last week's Passing Notes : —

Sir,— lf I don't write you, I shall burst. Dojon mean lo insinuate that a wooiun is not as good as a man, or, for that matter, a great dcU better ? If women havo smaller iicucU, it is because their skulls are not so thick, and if you were not a born slanderer, you would yourself own that the contents are of better quality. I allow that men have ationger bodies, ami this is the foundation of their tyranny, which is more brutality. Look how they beck, and bow, and cringo,

tSra-but mjot oKeoSlk ol M» Civi., you mint am, air, yours with contempt, mommA^ Now, I am not aware of having said anything to excite such rage in any female breast. Civis slander the sex! .Why, he adores them, and that is the very reason why he hates the very thought of a " divided skirt." I trust this explanation wiU help to pacify Miss Mary Macdougal.

The Daily Times chronicles a new departure in pulpit oratory. On Sunday WMrA. B. Masters, 8.A., who officiates in Mr M W. Green's Tabernacle, preached on the subject, " A bridge over the rivor of sin.', The preacher explained his subject by " the aid of a diagram" and " after relating one or two interesting anecdotes," wound up by exhorting the congregation to "orossthe bridge, to one end of which he gave the designation of 'Time, and to the other of 'Eternity.'" I hardly thmk the reporter can have got the drift of the rev. gentleman's peroration correctly. Did the preacher really exhort his hearers to cross from " Time " into " Eternity? " That looks like an incitement to suicide. Let us hope his eloquence was not of the dangerously persuasive sort, or when Mr M. W. Green re- < fcirns from his legislative toils he may find his Tabernacle depopulated. The idea, however, c,, Meriting anecdotes with diagrams— the old Vritffthe new-strikes me as likely to become popular. It will be said, perhaps, that it is an approaohtothe " show business," and no doubt high and dry respectability will turn up its nose at it; but what matters that if it keeps the congregation awake— a thing which, notoriously, high and dry respectability cannot always do. I learn from a Melbourne paper, that Mr J. J. Haley,, who also was at one time, I believe, a preacher at the Tabernacle, is resorting to diagrams to illustrate the doctrine of Infant Baptism. His Sunday advertisement, which is drawn out in the form of an epitaph, concludes as follows : Tha Covenants illustrated by the beautifully executed chart Shown at the Debate, which will be more fully explained than was • then possible. The beat of food provided freeSo are the Beats.

No Collection.

Here is a combination of attractions which ought to prove irresistible. One has a lurking doubt whether " the best of food provided free is to be taken in a material or a spiritual sense.Probably Mr Haley purposes only a Barmecide feast. Still, even on that supposition, he has a seductive way of putting things. He offers the best of spiritual fare, he shows "the covenants" on "beautifully executed oharts," his Beats are free., and-last but not worst-there ia "no collection." High and dry respectability will be hard driven to beat this.

More about "Excelsior"! Mr George Joachim obligingly communicates to the Times a letter of Longfellow's which I had not previoußly Been. It appeared some years ago in the Academy :— Mv Dear Sir,— l have had the pleasure of recelvim; your card with your friendly criticism on the word '• Excelsior." In reply, I would aay by way of explanation that the device on thn b inner U not to be interpreted * aioende snp'enus,' but- seopus mem etseduor ett ' This will make evnlent why I say " Excelsior,' and not "JSxcelßiuß."-With gre»t regard, yourß truly,

HBKRY W. LONGFKUiOW. The sentence scoptos inens cxcekior cst may be translated—" my object is a superior intelligence," and paraphrased— y lam climbing the Alps for tho improvement of my mind." It is possible, of course, to make " excelsior " right by supplying tho ellipsis with wbvds to suit, but the same thing might be said of any other expression that the poet had chosen to use. The essential point, however, is that Longfellow, in his letter to the Hon. Tuckerma», says that " excelsior " is used adverbially, translates it *' higher," and justifies this use by an appeal to "the best Latin writers"— an appeal which they do not sustain. In the letter to the Academy he has abandoned that ground, and makes "excelsior "an adjective in agreement with a noun [mens) understood. The ono explanation is as good (or as bad) as the other, and my belief is, that in later life —when ho had become a scholar— Longfellow would have been grateful to any one who could have suggested a third explanation sufficiontly plausible to relieve him of tho trouble of both.

What odd notions sonic people have of higl art. In last Wednesday** Daily Times a corros poiident begs to " suggest to the admirers or fancy dress balls the encouragement of high art in the personification of Shakespeare's charactors." He aays that " there is a wido range in the hundreds of different kings and queens, lords and ladies, inea and women of every station, fools and clowns." True, but, Lor

bless the man, the personification of Shake spcare's characters in bits of coloured calico lias nontenure to do with high art than the doll'b dr<Ases to winch I have referred in a" previous ncjjU. High art indeed! Shakespeare was something of a high artist himself, but even Mr v Garriok,' 1 the Times correspondent, would represent nothing but his own inanity as a fancy dress Lear or Hamlet. It seems to be one of the things not generally known that high jirL is made of passion and imagination, and not ot cotton goods.

Two of -the best speeches dcliverod on Thursday night on Sir George Grey's bill to proven! tho purchase of votes (says a contributor of the New Zealand Times) were those of Messrs 11. S, Fish and M. W. Green. They wore both worthy of being more fully reported in the newspapers. With Messrs Pish, Green, Bracken, and Dick to represent her, Dunediu ijhpuW certainly be well looked after.