THE OWL-CRITIC.
A LESSON TO FAULT- FINDERS. " Wbo stuffed that white owl ?" No oue spoke in the shop ; The barber was busy, and he couldn't stop ; The customers, waiting their turns, were all reading The Daily, the Herald, the Post, lifctlo heeding The young man who blurted out such a blunt question ; Not one raised a head, or even made a suggestion ;
And the barber kept on shaving. " Don't you see, Mister Brown," Cried the youth with a frown, " How wrong the wholo thing is, How preposterous each wing is, How flattened the head is, how jammed down the neck is — In Bhort, the wholo owl, what an ignorant wreck 'tis ! I make no apology ; I've learned owl-eology. I've passed dayß and nights in a hundred collections, And cannot be blinded to any deflections Arising from unskilful fingers that fail To stuff a bird right, from his beak to hia taiL Mister Brown ! Mister Brown ! Do take that bird down, Or you'll soon be the laughing-stock all over town !" And the barber kept on sharing "I've studied owls, And other night fowls, : And I tell you What I know to bo true : An owl cannot roost : With his limbs so uuloosed ; No owl in this world Ever had his claws curled, Ever had his legs slanted, Ever had his bill canted, Ever hadhis nock screwed Into that attitude. He can't do it, because 'Tis against all bird laws ! I Anatomy teaches, Ornithology preachers, An uwlh'ia a, toe That can't turn out so ! I've made the white owl my study for years, Aud to see such a job almost moves me to tears ! Mister Brown, I'm amazed You should be so gone crazod As to put up a bird In that postnre absurd ! To look at that owl really brings on ft dizziuesa The n>an who stuffed him don't half know his business !" And the barber keep 3on shaving. Juet then, with a wink and a Bly normal lurch, The owl, very gravely, got down from his perch, Walked roun(?,and regarded his fault-finding critic
(Who thought he was stuffed) with a glance analytic. And then fairly hooted, as if be should say : " Your learning's at fault thißtime, anyway ; Don't wasit it again on a live bird, I pray. I'm an owl: your another. Sir Critic, good' day 1" And the barber kept on shaving.
THE OWL-CRITIC.
Otago Witness, Issue 1449, 30 August 1879, Page 23
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