Passing Notes.

Otago Witness, Issue 1436, 31 May 1879, Page 15

Passing Notes.

Professor Sale, in the opening address which he delivered on Friday night, before the University Debating Society, expressed a hope that the Association might expand into a sort of literary club, housed possibly between the University and the Professor's abodes. There would be in such an institution a large room for debatea; a library ; a writing room with stationery, directories, etc. ; lavatories ; and comfortable snuggeries where newspapers, magazines, and perhaps even coffee and the nicotian herb mighty be enjoyed. The Professor has certainly suggested what would prove of great use to the students. Any one who visits an English University goes at once to the Union. There, about 5 p.m., he meets the undergraduate world. Some are coming from the boats, others from dis-secting-rooms ; some are full of the Bicester hounds ; another crowd have been to Ely on their bicycles. All have done something and are eager to compare notea with their comrades. Little groups are formed, and every question of the hour eagerly discussed. Then the dinner hour comes and the Union is deserted. About 9 it fills again, and is the common ground where all meet. Letters are written, coffee drunk, and schemes of all sorts formed. It is the rarest thing in the world for an English undergraduate to enter a tavern, except to order a big dinner. "Very few of them would accept, without some scruples, an invitation to drink at a bar. They keep beer and spirits in their own rooms, and etiquette require* that a visitor shall always be offered wine at whatever hour he call. But abroad, in the city, the correot thing is a cup of coffee, price twopence, at the Union. Where is the amusement, they would ask, of drinking in a tavern? There one has to stand up like a horse at a stall ; while in the Union there are. luxurious arm-ohairs, and a cup of coffee is a delightful accompaniment to the last numbers of Punch or the newest novel, It always pains me to «cc young fellows, who look like undergraduates, frequenting public-houses: and I am- sure'. that the way to Keep them from doingthis is to found such an institution as Professor Sale described. All the Good Templars' in the world would not do &% much, to reclaim a young man from spirits as might be achieved by the offer of good coffee and a large arm-chair. I have not said a word about the advantages likely to arise from the Debating Society itself, as these ate already felt, and there is every hope that we shall soon boast of an arena where the future Goschens and Gladstones of New Zealand may be trained to oratory. "What shall be done to the king whom the man delighteth to honour ?'' is not quite accurately quoted, but the little alteration is necessary for my purpose. Besides, why not misquote ? "Angels' visits, few, and far between," is a misquotation, but a time-honoured one. To return. How can we best honour Vio- L toria Regina 1 An extraordinary outburst of effusive loyalty has lately marked " Society" journals at Home. One describes her as being waited on by the Duke of Wellington when she was about 20 years old. The occasion was tragic. A soldier had been sentenced to death for desertion, and his death-warrant awaited her signature. She let him off. "Mark now, how a plain tale shall put 'you down." The "Iron Duke" was never Premier after 1830, when the Queen was 11 years old, and could not therefore have been the bearer of the warrant ; besides, Boldiers are not shot for desertion unless the act is committed on the tented field, and then it's a short shrift and no need for a Royal warrant. I like to expose this story, for it would be an insult to our Courts to reverse their decisions at the whim of a girl. Turning from dukes to minor mortals, let us ask how our working man keeps Victoria's birthday. By Mb own confession he gets drunk, and pleads Her Majesty's natal day as an extenuating circumstance ! Even the greybeard, Time, feels the contagion. Standing opposite the Colonial Bank on Monday morning, at about three minutes to eight, I heard the clock strike six ! I went back at nine out of pure devilment, and it struck seven ! Five minutes elapsed, and it struck eight ! In two minutes more it went nine ! I supposed it was now fairly off "the spree," and went home to moralize. The disappearance of the Bible from our State schools will cause great inconvenience to one class of jester. Dost thou know him? His delight it is to quote a well-known phrase or sentence in some new or forced sense. This is annoying to his friends, and, if he culls his extracts from the Scriptures, may offend many. Should the rising generation no longer know their Bible, ' ' familiar in their { mouths as household words," hin jests will lose their point. Now I shall regret this, because there are a few time-honoured stories of great piquancy. Shall I rescue from oblivion one delicious reading of the catechism ? The Rev. Mr Brookfield, one of H.M. inspectors of schools in England, is responsible for the following, which waß written for him in perfect good faith by a child. He aßked " What 'is thy duty towards God ?" The reply was: — "My duty toads God is to bleed * in Him to leering and loafing with old ' your arts, with old my mine, with old c my sold, and with my serenth, to whir- ( chip and to give thinks, to put my old ' trust in Him, to call upon Him} to.

* honor His old name," &o. I am afraid that in the year 1979 this will not raise a smile. There is a story which has long been current in England, and which is indisputably true. I should not venture, yet,, to print it there, but in this ultima Thule pardon may be granted. When Prince Hassan, son of the Khedive of Egypt, was an undergraduate at Christ Church, his rank naturally made him the recipient of many little at* tentions, which he generally accepted in good part. One day the Rev. C. Talbot, Principal of Keble College, offered to take his Highness for a ride in a dogcart. This tickled the Prince's fancy, who generally looked a little bored in Prince Leopold's quiet pony- carriage, and delighted rather in a tandem ; if on a crowded road with a fresh leader, why so much the better. The invitation was accepted, and, to be brief, resulted in an upßet, The damage resulting was so slight that Mr Talbot resolved to try again, but thought he had better seleot a corpus vile for his next experiment. Accordingly he offered the vacant seat to Mr Dodgson, well known as the author of " Alice in Wonderland." Upraised eyebrows were at first the, sole reply ; then came half reluctantly from clerical lips the irresistible answer :— " Wilt thou slay 'me as thou dide't the ' Egyptian yesterday ?"

I was walking down Whiteoross street not very long ago— perhaps it may be , here explained that this thoroughfare intersects one of the foulest quarters of London— and there in all his glories was the "jolly "god! Glancing at the glaring lights' ot gin-palaceß, who could fail to worship him? What' total abstainer, if forced ,to inhabit the dark and murky Alleys of that dreadful place, could resist turning his coat and becoming a votary of Bacchus ? I noticed little ragged sallow children carrying home quarterns of ' gin ' to homes X7hon the viWol madnws flashes up In the ruffl»n'« ADd the, filthy bylane.ringi to the shriek o! tht trampled wife, and for a time looked around in vain, for gome glimpse of better things in the long vista of squalor and vice. Scenes like this may. well lead earnest philanthropists to advocate the cause of total abstinence. At lajrtVaort of haven of refuge was espied,, in, the chape of a coffee-house, where, you could sit down in peace and obtain refreshment which, if not very tempting, was at any rate not poisonous. I went in. and expended a penny, a coin j that in London will buy a good deal, in a j cup of, coffee. It was ihot, sweet, not unpalatable, and even to the worldling's taste „jHUcn better than doctored .spirits. There was much to be seen. Great hunches of bread were being devoured, bowls of cheap nutritious soup slobbered up by men "feeding like horses when you hear 'them feed," and plenty of coarse low language going. The raise en seem was not aesthetic. Yet the men, though rough, looked healthy ; the moral atmosphere was not contaminating. Had I found . this coffee - house redolent of lavender-water and adorned with illuminatedtexts, I should have pronounced it an exotic, powerless alike for evil and for good. Will there nevefc be coffeehouses in Dunedin? Let them have a license by all means, and encourage smoking. Place spirits before a man, but place also abundance of cheap food, and his beloved tea, which here is better understood than coffee. His natural instincts', will lead him to the tea and meat, unless he feels the want of brandy. At present hotels handicap everything that is wholesome. You can get a sandwich, worth a penny, for sixpence ! Can you get anything else for less than a shilling? Men of sound common sense are obliged to stand and drink spirits until they feel sick and giddy, when they would a thousand times rather sit down comfortably and discuss their affairs over a dish of tea or a bowl of soup, in a place where illustrated newspapers are handy and the pipe of peace permitted.

Plastic surgery, if ' the gossip of the London hospital may be believed, is really' of Indian origin. Its introduction into Europe dates from the time of Tagliacozzi, who made much lucre by supplying lost parts to those who had Buffered mutilation at the hands of "justice." Anyone can do the trick now. A man goes to the hospital minus his nose. He says he is a miller, and while grinding some rather questionable wheat noticed a curious smell. A laudable curiosity led him to apply his nose to the Btones, with the awful result that his proboscis was converted into, &c, &c. Of course the surgeon has heard of this sort of Btory before. He knows well enough how the noße was loßt. But that is neither here nor there ; a new organ is wanted, and 'is promptly supplied. The art of transplanting skin from one place to another has led to some curious things in Paris. A well-known billiard player found a whitlow appearing on his thumb. Why it prevented him playing, I don't know ; but he turned his genius into other channels. He obtained a dozen large rats, and cut the tails off six, turning the owners loose. . .The other six were chloroformed, and carefully splitting their noses, he spliced in the tails taken from their companions. After a week's anxiety he found his work held good. The new beasts were put in the market as Mus elephas from the Marquesas Group, and fetched enormous sums. The end of that man is painful to contemplate. Obtaining a half-grown hawk, ho removed the feathers, from the back ; then he shaved the corresponding parts in a rat, and by & somewhat similar method to that de*

scribed above, contrived to effect adhesion of the parts. Here was a monster indeed. Alas The best laid plans of men and mice Gang 1 aft agee. He had never thought of the hawk growing a big bird while the rat remained the same size ! One fine day the bird soared into the empyrean, rat and all. The luckless author of their joint being was never seen again alive. Some say he died of pure chagrin ; others ridicule the whole story. Is it authentic ? I can only say with Byron— Ido not know ; no more do ) r ou." CIVIS.