Thank you for correcting the text in this article. Your corrections improve Papers Past searches for everyone. See the latest corrections.

This article contains searchable text which was automatically generated and may contain errors. Join the community and correct any errors you spot to help us improve Papers Past.

Article image
Article image
Article image
Article image
Article image
Article image

THAT ERE OFF HORSE.

A hornyThanded old farmer entered the offices of one- of the -big-.railcoad-.com-panie3 the other day, and inquired for the man who settled for hosaes which; was killed by locomotives of a bloated} corporation. They referred him to the bompany's counsel, whom, having founc , lie thus addressed : "Mister, I was driving ho'merdna evening; last week. Audvlieli. T came td the crossing of your soulless ; monopoly--^ it \ra3 pretty dark, and-^-zip"! along' bame your train, no bells rjung, no whisfcles tooted^contrary to the statutes in such; case3 l made and provided, janji agin the Grirangeiv decisions, and — whoop! ■away yrent my off hoss a scooting over ; the telegraph wires. When [ had dug myself out'n a swamp some distance ofi^ and pacified the other critter, I found that* thar 'off '-hoss' was as daad as leniy Smith, nothing valuable about him bub his shoes, which msut have brough ) say eight cents for joldjroii. Well;!- ."•] "' ' . Vv'ell* . youT want payr for" that "ore off. j hqss?" said->the lawyer;; with a-acarcsly.^ repressed- sneer. . " Xlcinder -should, you see," replied the farmer, frankly^ .^'.and I don't care about, going to law about it, though posjibly I'd get a verdict j for ; jurio3 out ia our town is mostly made up | of farmers, 'and they kinder help" eaoh other, aa a, matter of principle, in these caS6s'of stock-killed by f^%oacU'." ." Au'd | thia-ere— off- horae, l '~"»aid[ -the' counsel, '

mockingly, "was a Hambletonian colt out of an- Abdallah mare, * 'with' -'seventeen Messenger crosses, .wasn't he ? Oh ! I've heard of. that off horse before.",.,.^! l' guess there's a mistakes6na.ewfier'e, J s'oijny^ *'* 'said t^e* old 'farmer, "with' an' ajr of'sdrp' p'Hse'y/ 1 *' my 'htfes ' was'^t"^'^!'^'^^ Butt's roan pacing-hoss, 'Pride of Lem^n l^ out'n a wall-eyed?, no-accpunii'mar&'of imy^ own, and, now that ho's .deadj-:l"niay;flay,.; .that hew^sst^euty^ninenext grasaj-.Trot??. Why, J^red firby's horsesj, thai; he.3ras' i fined n for furious' driving of,"was'joicl T)exter' alongside of him ! < §i 6IOO6 s !''* Bles3 yotir^ soul, dbyou think I ? m' a- darn fool, or any sroneelse \ .. .Itjis .true J was made an offerj. 'for l^im tl^e last time I, was in .town, and,' from 'a ' man" ' looidrig kinder 'feimplb}' l and-: you know how, it ;is yourself ;with ho'ss trading, I aske.d the s cua% more'n thle,! l^" mal-might have been' worthy J'aaked $^j-1j -1 but I'd have taken, ;s£&',' '«'« ' $40 !" gasped' s the lawyer, "^4O !"' v 'Tes," replied the 1 farmer, meejdy and:, apologetically, "lit"' kinder -lopks a bigvsum, J-knqw, for ?,n_ old hoss, 'but that ere f piff -horse could pull a mighty good load,, considering. Then J was kinder shook up, and the r pole of my' waggon was busted j and I;had:.tp get the harness' fixed, and/there's my Ipssof tinte, >, and all that; cbtmts.'-.. Say and its about "squared", .The" lawyer i',whi 3 P er M softly to himself^ " Well^lUvße bulldozed •!" and filled' oat . a.\cneck : ,f or-f 5(^0,"Sir," said he; covering' 'the, old man's hand, "you, are the .first, hoagstlman ;I have met in the course ence ". pf twenty-three y^arsjfrjthe 'first farmer whose dead 'horseTfwaslworih lejss j than •* $i,OOQ, and- 'cjduldn'f 'Mt ' ibetter than training/" ETe'refalsojis'" a free pass for yourself lah'd^your malgr heirs in a direct'line for ihree*generation|s^ ' tJ aridif you haye 'a young-boy to'spafe, we, will teach him -telegraphing,' and, fijiji.^nn' steady and lucrative employmte"n't." jt T^e J honest, old farmei; iop'k , ( the 'cteck atid departed," smiting- his' Horny leg' wijih^ 1 is br'a\vny handar^ triumph as, he ■w ; ith the .re.mark.: , \^- 'kne\jvVJ'd',fetch him on the honest track j, T Last shoas! I had killed I swore -was a trotter, and all I got was .$165 and intereslk Honesty jis the .best policy/'-r- Chicago l+rihune. \

Permanent link to this item

https://paperspast.natlib.govt.nz/newspapers/OW18770825.2.113

Bibliographic details

Otago Witness, Issue 1343, 25 August 1877, Page 21

Word Count
606

THAT ERE OFF HORSE. Otago Witness, Issue 1343, 25 August 1877, Page 21

THAT ERE OFF HORSE. Otago Witness, Issue 1343, 25 August 1877, Page 21

Help

Log in or create a Papers Past website account

Use your Papers Past website account to correct newspaper text.

By creating and using this account you agree to our terms of use.

Log in with RealMe®

If you’ve used a RealMe login somewhere else, you can use it here too. If you don’t already have a username and password, just click Log in and you can choose to create one.


Log in again to continue your work

Your session has expired.

Log in again with RealMe®


Alert