Varieties.

Otago Witness, Issue 847, 22 February 1868, Page 14

Varieties.

■■ Ajt Oed Saw New Set. — What can't beendured must be caricatured, ; " I'll be round this way in a minute," a* l)( the second-hand said to the pendulum. The prettiest neck-tie for a lady — the arm* . ',"' of her baby. . Why is it dangerous to walk in wooda in early Spring I — Because the trees are shoot-v . .'. ing. • • ' . . „;,-- 1 • A -fbibkd has presented us with the auto-- . .-,. graph of .the blacksm'th who rivited,,the-, i -,, i public gaze ; also, one of the timbers ' of the \"~\ "~ • house that a celebrated actor brought down. „ ' ' . -A censorious old.bachelor says that;maay, [.s,. s , an elderly spinßter will send word to a visitor.- ;' that she is "engaged," when she never,evwihad an "offer" in all the days of her life. • , ■ How a^ Artful Wife Manages It. — ' .-.' /'Whenever I want a nice snug day, all. to- .,.,. myself, I- tell' George my mother ia coming, h and then I see nothing of him til one in the morning."- ... . . > . If it wasn't for hope the heart would break, as the old " woman said when she - * buried her seventh husband, and looked, t ' anxiously among the funeral crowd for. an- , , other. . ' • • • , A Quaker lady recently explained to her-. / . new domestic that wash-day came every ~ Second Day. < The girl left in high dudgeon. She didn't go to be washing every other day \ ' — not she ! » • ' .... "Boys," what is all that noise in school ?"r , "Tt's Bill. Sikes imitating a locomotive.'*" ; i 4 "Come up here,. William, if you've turned „ into a locomotive, it's time you were switched', „ off." A little girl walking one day with her -, „. mother in the churchyard, reading one after.. -„;';, 1 another ;' the praises of those who slept v; beneath, i said, -" I wonder where they bury .. .,, the siuners 1". . • • , •,-, ' " Papa, what is that picture over the .. ., , mantelpiece?" The vain father answered, „, : iJ "Why, that's papa's arms, my darling !" : /., " Then why don't you have your legs putnpj.- .„,,., too ?" was the reply. 'An Irish recruit was asked by his officer, ...j "What's your height?" to which Pat re- in „, plied, "The man that measured told me it.- : , was five foot ten, or ten toot five: I'm not .f v; exactly sure which — but it was either one or - • the other." • ' ■ ■ - * ' A ' young gentleman being pressed very f i-. hard in company to sing, even after he had vir-< solemnly assured them that he could, not,. * ltA observed -testily that they wanted to mate a ■-, buft'oi him. t: No, my good sir," said Mr ■,•• Colraan,' "we only want to get a stave out of " ; you." ; .. • - : . ' .. - ' A Btjtfoow at the Court of Francis I. • >• : , complained 'to the king that a great lord; .-, threatened to murder him for uttering somejokes about him. "If ho does. " said Francis, ; "he sht^llbe hanged in five miautes after." - . " I wish,"> replied the complainant, "your-.J majesty would please to hang him five- -■» minutes before." ■ ■ • "<{ Dr. Thomson took occasion to exhort his -. man David, who was a namesake of his, to -__ ■ abstain from excessive drinking, otherwise -T he' would- bring his gray hairs prematurely' 1 ' :"'J to' the' grave. ''Take my advice, David,"' .i* said the -minister, "and never take more' r " •/ than' one glass at a time." "Neither I do,' • i'j sir'," said David^ "neither I do/; but I care- ' unco 'little how short the. time be atween - ""-I the twa;", ' ■' .\ l ' ... „-_, !A bakkbr of Frankfort, while proceeding -'> «! to Vienna by railway not long since, fell into ''»•$ conversation with, a gentleman of very'"'' v^l pleasing manners, who was in the same- -car- r -^ ria^e with him; and so delighted wasthe^i^a bankei;with^ his new' ncquaintance, ' that hs^^y offered,' to give him' a letter of recommenda>^'^ tibn'f;ohis daughter, who was well' married'"'<H| , in Vienna;' and might be of serv cc to him? ?|a Th'ej gentleman; I . thanked him, and : with-»£lj|| smile said— " T also have one of my daughteW'O^ ' ma)pcd at % Vienna, and she has made a very*}s|| tolerable -match." •'?' Pray, may I-premune > '- > a^OT ■ 'sfti'd' tHe ''banker,' "to ask the name bf'ha*w|| 'hiifeband ?" ' "It is the Emperor of Austria,'? I '^ /' answer; -the gentlenian being Prince^ral Maximilian of Bavaria. ' i$M

15,-18.67. ,_ spotf ia|&^ ! piyto : ;^iaho'witH stool|~ |^matib^mdta"form;m'dee'djf?Jn6'er! Yankee philo- V £tha4> 'hii¥u^eau^wash-" p& n drOT»Tsrllo'oldttg-glass', Work-; K^H ntingSdeslo:F/i- t ~Here ri^fifltef afVciistl&oiidn^ for the^iinabimintii to"ifealis©Bpiiar^ thegajjovel' Soriyof r;playirig£rßß4tli(iv«n>r ;playirig£rßß4tli(iv«n> oriel Im6:;oii eyouw upiano ii,ijie < pandfVashiifgTyouii fabeiin^ubTireau^ w^Bittin^tjiMthal j: I n6fi l pinsciJ aidls^|c^ay&btKiigi:bf:la looking-glass jfath ; arDiVanvPiano ?I* Sy pditiohiobl;Ta a "rpeerlessti Gookingf |'?-a pak^ntpcialrscuttle, f f imp'sryions' flat' arid r e^at6r^Jwhose''bbttpmo<wili' "cdi3&, ( */ . andna>'ico4fee*r'das ; tet'/i ,whifch'.;" coffee goes; twice ■ .as |as' • Ibya Ixjraniar^ ; onejioiayjAv.en:.aspire.-fcbi houseing.. . 'Cqmp'lato.iioii .b£»the.'high .priced fal, for there 7^i*o^a»«rtificial(|uel ianthraciteii'coal^jdustj r.'andi ppeggs be. six'centsra;piece'i.*syithf.an' if d 'tendfeJLCy, 1 ? "_ty ou:.;perennially.>»rei. ]&'■& concentratipif.cf othereame^ con-'. fed, sp^ as^ip^kee^ifrvtshf'akidpurbdn 3imate ioit anyjnutiberj'of year3.*---lirpr |ybu ;.ben!ecbaoniicalj>'dni'i tHe <]use'- of %hen you'ffcan^'ava alL v there")isj''and fno exerlipni whatever t6 <yourseifi,r by i purchase^iPf aji'clpckrtthatvmay ibe, constant iiaotion of the -^tnidsphericjipressdre^iwhichi I act as Tan.'Lagent^sto wind'iup .the U! lf,"h'ofeeye'rifiyouare.'sppiled <by< DiivanPiaxio3for/.'anyiarticle:b£ifurni-: r whicli is frot;-.ai*>inanimate:jaclc-of-'ali-as?, you ca v tt'struggllstfo'r ; the possession te, " American f^bmbinationj'Casket;' ih co"ntains.risix .'.drawers, « a fhyriting-i ;-"table, wpriC-^tand, :'ai-.musical' clock iaed with-* arches!' And! wreathsjtifthe ir fomed/iof-'.thejjfurs andrslcins'-of irican a'njmalsitinterline'a Iwith'fithe liers, qui^&,;jjandr eggs' of t Ahierifcan s ; ' produstibrfs:.pi:(the!iminesV ; » of 'the st, and bfijagrjcultuTe^ abovfigure^in casketj th*e;f,wh^l6obemg/surm:ouhted Ke great Ajfierican'eagle"j:a6cofnpahied L'pbrfcraits.^KJord ijl>i orf \C-^n t on i~| we cannot givei' expression' t6 (I ou!i: hearts' deepjf elt .emjotiom HvJc-n 1 u?t> A^ fie thoughtTof Jthis"'iri^enidus jtfks'terU If and al^e.adj^iwb'-'helHr'' Ffehcteiieb: aim, " Vat^a peoples' l/Vat-a'pe^o^les^P' ,fiis Casketewe aview3tihe^.efc[uei{. r df -^the |a Piano-e?on v tfiis'^ta 1 c cb'm^m'ent'Vf other. " Aaithe/lalter^de^'nbti fitrflish ible, and . iiti iiiglit^nb't'be^|)'ari!icul appeusingltp: hikkil onß'-s ; mea;ll c bff% 1 hßtand,V^«iOsfsket " :fills^ub y > ,th> orredvacuumJWhatv'ifihe'pfpdu'ctidri iHe'^nines, to£' agriculture^, nieans^^ y^", 'we" affcji(bt-.pfepared- s 't6'' :( sa^", \\ U^p^b^ en : : k a Pick'wicldari^etse.^^he^ird ►IVeed6m,'^f thati-^'hal' I fla'pp'e'd^Hits |8 in the fade\of noiless'thatf-Imperial Jfesty/ speal£S«ifdr; >itselfi? JDoilbtleis sowings areiiwiSe'fspre'acl,' ftaaS* the %bportraits, swhich" 'of course're'.leatthe Presidents fcbf -tfie . «United probably jfdrto.'fa ?j)a ! trioiiic f festf6dri rat the nobteibirdr;asJa i practical" illW Wl of the nati6^'s^mbtiiop^^%n6t« Mn\' Peop^cabnot long^cbntin'ue'tci Ke" excessively qnaoistj t'iuttfeomt arfabie lies" o| the'ffiseiVes^-fdri'dJbwning'wil] reckonedif among the" vlo&t'- 1 tots. it be'otherjflaJseji^whe'n^tKe^&^rc )^ntiHe :^^^rvingr3nat&essesj2J''»r niaic CToyageacfo'sjjtlie Atlantic, and c ,felife rmg'rafts'^tJiett^^R'f^, shorts space'/b: S&iMinutes'^an ibejOnflated arid piit'it SmeW ?,' Msttr.esle'ssiand'f xaf tSjifh'qw be. entirely unnecessary:* whei convinced of 1;; .tibie { .fea,si ||ofiithei. ' " unsubmersible "Vessel,' i&'fcan -be- r2tised L " at "WtS^St -W un Wmksi $$to*ffl£ss6l ■' GsthM^wTiei mll\.hay^becb'Meiira,pr4gti^ed^^ |xdea* of 7s&UescopeJ<- an~.ins^uhien r^b;6/;atmospheric cHange Pding heavjy; w^ather/inand' todbeptrsie< mit^yrin>predeteTnnning^all^ ; gre'a p'?^Still Heaffer"^?,t ( hsr'->cnillenniur fe^be : 'to^^K^'e'|tablffiiiMent"';i Wolf revolv^g^eam^mo'-nb gestion of a'tjyirompf?§team ria'vigatio y tfi^c%wyr^ad|le,^ea afe f wounpVt^.^^whic|/iK}.place as^>nd l *:swings^ v oa;;a^9-flßannga,i( &WeelsJ^- Ife^asserte^tljat; jtl P>'e.e'quaJ/,i|awwu:perioivS;a thi ,ian^i^a^ib^B9tsbJ^(i3 wilWa 1 the ocean or'Jop'on'-glaoialf ea iave a formidable rival, and i

I (Sipien^JSii 1 Ibhn'FTarl&lins^aiijd' Dh'^anes' vc I are ( /'d6stih^a > 'to'^conifortable, I ' inglorious' ! a ' .to p^s/a'iugh't 1 in 1 London I ; aii'd" arun'up 1 ' C ii f^mir^siS.via'me'^ortli^ole^wiU be" a t tlie i mo^ < sUlisH'iorf ) 6f;a i sleighi)-ideV • ll ' ! .' ' o f .j^Wpetheijitis worth while to Toe a jn ; tauSilS9 TOjfeoonteft,, an^^irea, a, teal, oyeri .artificialj eyes, bu%so exqui- re sitely are -the .latter made now ..that no sr one need mourn theuoss of r the- '.former.! ti 'I+ll- -•'! 'liU '''J. .i'HUJf ,I )',, ,'.'"ryiu : !••/ -•'' ' n Their cpjlprjis- brilliant, their, lustre never, 9] so biind.,as,,those who won't 1 see,, and as gi the f majpr|ty; of mankuad i ma^be- classed 1^ ,^', tllw*'Jcasegp^) l '^^aSce^lias a dec^dejd' bl ' v advatitage v " ( eVen' here', 11 and! ( afi '. "defies, ,fa 'natWre'to'her'yery -t^eth j^age^is cheated <oi '<i)f l]'Kia-'-l ] 'Kia-'-' j fp j rnier''triiim^hs ;" hollow 'cheeks Vi t are l5 no, more -distinguishable than- hollow a< _, e ( arjts ? for .-there be 'artificial teeth with tv "coniinubiis gums, as also attachments for pi restoring the contPur of the face. , . ■ But ,p] "it ' there live Hho'se.Vwhb" .prefer- '."to ' grow ,m tneir,own teeth ; and- to remain in- conse- ( ,Q 'qtieh'ce v victim's ' tb ) '!den'6s I £si l "these ' iii- ( «,! fatuated- lndiyiduals will rdjoice to In hear" I " of"l.a n invention -called • the g( -" J Saiiya'p;um^ ';-ThT' qb'ject ' of ! this' ct HnsJOTjment is!' " t io; '^cuitate,' l £?ie Rental 1 0 Jdj6 ( efation 'of filling 'or' )pliigg'in^ | the 1 teeth 15 .^Wlg^' I]^,'l1 ]^,' 1^ 1 to plevetit' 'th'e fc Valivafirpm, wetting them wliile ( r^Ofk , \& L t go.mg','.cm. r " i: ft i ;cqnsis)is/ r iri 1 means fp'r "jp. 'hblding'£he l tbngue kway from 1 fixe ;' s< alsp fof supporting the upper jaws, and so t< ) assiUingP-ffio >J 'muscles 3ll 'whiclij''k'eei?' the 'ii mtoi 'opetf,' acd.' J iii;plitiiping th'e 1 saliva' tl J 6uf af,' ! the" mquth : /as"-'''fast l ad r it' is' di's-' It •c]i t argea:;;.by • tile^dandsJ^'The^seyetalj I: , di,vers~by ."which 'these' bbj e"cts J are .brought ri Mu€" cbmpJse'Wne t 'iiistnini f entV'; i i i''The. 'fi 'inoment i "pain cic 'is T ac I cbmpa'nied°sy '^xcitej 1 'h ip^'it b^om^s 1 a;k6dffigd;f6H4 oJ'pleai I ' *'To'si^ with' your 'fie^ in-a'yice^oW J s; €eritisticaf| arm, ( com^ressing' > ySur p • t|ie' ? 6thern%in^reWng your lungs'", your a ' 'Hqdffi^'t&e^^'ti^'bein^a^re^ptade b ' for , 'together 1 ,ii , ( vanaty7qf\instrum"ents^vhich;;for 'g warit^pf^technical^nomefidlatu^^^^ wiU 'n appropiat'ely call/pile-driVers :'' to*, endure 'v alt this ? 'we : , 'repeat jjis'^. undergo' martyr- \ ctdni', ' " n'dne| th' &* . : less / heroic for , neve't '.f ; 1 hVeing- ,b"e'en' .jpanoniz'ed: J '^d<l ~'to' it v "% l s ' ' .series 'of ; ' Vdivefs"' busily ' rushing' ih"and i J orft as"alsp y -tne«po'^ibility * t #f ij/jonsequenii ' 'strangulatioiij v atld J the ' ! 'chair., becomes the centre of 1 a"'iKorsd;'-; fascSiatiolx. ■"; ''^hen'" 'there ■'-aifep artificial 1 - l lrmb l 3; i '' ! mbst\a(iinirably ! J . .fa|nibiied;;"lf; r is u r -£he v intention, '^we J ye'; J^~se^ r most 1 promising''csrip'ple in! America^ or the ' ' : nufp'ose 'of ''giving' him'''^n'entir^' < 6'utfit I bf 1 frnVs'ajidaegs^and-Vekding Him t'^Paris '' ; as' s a -triumph of art qver, accident. '„""-"' .Ho 'longer, need the rSquth of, America ,^ve.in:£eai;;of lte.mortal^e^nemy;,. Yellow ■ to an ■ ',untiinelyend: . Who.can"d6ub.t that're'ajds I ' ' Ay-study p^n the inoculation of .the aew ( me^n's ( fpr'i diminishing "• 'tfie^mQftality a.mpng, to tropical- ; .countries ?1'!.? 1 '!.' J j To/)je.,vaccrnate J d ( >7ith, dew ! 1 MTYil^ii.^ v ; a.pes ( M; f-:no^.logicallyf -:no^.logically ;, tpjcj^ tKtt.af therS^ges^ofj.sniall'pox^ * raqdafied^byl.th'e yaccine'.of .cow^," >'. 'th^a^yelloWj j:e*ye"r 'will be held' in sub'Jec-" |! .tion/byj^h^jV^cin^ of> the dews,, of^in-; \ 'fe's^d* regions ? /^ot^ing/'caiil'.be' clearer, ■ f |o f {an;unp,rejudiced "mind... .'.Perhaps ,a ; no i less' impor<iaht,revolutioni9er of ?{atu gyp J 12 tfie' n ' Ajnerican, designed : f^Strd'ogsdelighrto bark and bite; ■ • 7; .siwLithe ..bgneYqlenfc/IJr^iWatts^hP, "be-. 'I. jlilveCin accprd^cg^o, genius, itsyfull prer; 1 .rogatives. "'Hpg^'^.oPr I™s i&%& >'though^ i?" sliould be,pernp.t|gdr;tp Jcpllow^jjaUtt ihe 1- -uiborh impulses, of-, their; i.aqpiring. r E,obting, .we cbnsider/asnatiye.and ; to, the, a"' mSnh'er ! "b'omt Li-Sq, .cpnfiriMQd -/ hasj the ?>' .piibJliciKecOnie, in.thisidea^asj-to haye^e™ idu<Jedoit^tdt'a > prpver^^and. .-/ j •; rk r > fci> i- i # lwl-^JfAH'B<ooV,zko&-6i Diei"- : '> >j." ; '"■■•) tf f is^uKf 'CSfexq^iSilive'ly^aaap^d; music;: & -Bui; thVwta is'Snce^mbr^wwing:; ':.Th'e; 'p'o'rbine^fxaferni^ liaye 'nP'^ights' which' * ma£"is s> b'ouM' {bvrelpeciu^The';:.unseb v relpeci u^The'; : .unseh r ' *' "ftmeW^ac^ot^bourini by: tlfe'. sweat' of 5-' B 6ile'^br'p^3yis, doomed, ''to / c becotae | fiction^, tf' 'and,''^utura,'! generations- wifi'^'tiave^ no >t , 'Ka.fdStasglthan %& ! of ;'milid ; ing f ;qtner l©' pe.^^fsibusin'essy surroui3ei?ed l by 'all 'the.' n , , ', modemi xpnyenierices .'' f bV^'thej ; fl'ameA I* iproxninent 1 cbnveni6nce''bein|Hh'e^ ( ,'^re-. >§ •.yblymg'r6cHiig-isKaif," I fey>bichihe most' ??• •impofta'hti "Changes" ina'y be r raade J in..the ie f6rtun§S' i: an"dKpharacte/s ,«bf iJ 'individuals; a* twitlfolif Jthe-;J the- ; et'ertipn of •/t'utriing^fblind: ua' gaze's witH-ntSiby^,^' 81 1 T fi^H i; 'tKiß )il 'slrrctly Americari' :; inspiratibn.' n - What the result will be of sending are

>lvaljig rooking (Chaxr^o^ ifarxs, we.ar,^ a^ loss "ito.iifnagine." Of.|what.nefiessi^y,', 0, iq^riterlintOjCalcjUjitation^whena ",p^[-' il'at^,]!^achirie*'9pera|ies])yitVi;en i %'urw a.time. j iEv^n, tho ; perpetijal, bpiher. : Ijtak^n'g. . biff 'ahd!^,puttiag l jbn gloves .aVj'J be, . obviated ;i ( in '$',! measure „b,y ie" adoption ' of a' initt^n^ , in., which' tne^ igers may jpe r uncovered , without, re-, S^ing the mitteij from ■the. handw' .lii ( the; nguage..pf '.the \fio,turej' ."id give th^e' ifcjben" will signify ' aUowing. one to .Hay^e Jlijger'in' whatever pie' is under prqcess. ■/dissection. . This invention, is greatly anscende^i by.the ,f, c t Ladiqs' : /-^ot ar y an's,"a. joint in" the' handle producing, a. iisry fans'^twp or' jmore niultanedukly.,j ;^ijne ,^jng inoney,'parcu^arly ,in. society, wlier'e it' is killed from 7e\ ' use, no -greater, , b'enef action ' , coiftd ive^iieen evolvesd'out ['bf,' ) th'e,4nn i er' J . |^'n- > liousness. ( ! Anything t \ihat ; 'assists _ , in yl'ng; facility, to. the noble ar£ of coquetry ■^ as' 'Jefferson ' Davis V'would .say^^a, lessing in disguise.'';" Wi]bKthe' ordinary. ,n' t it"i 3 difficult to parry on more ae' flirtation at 'a.', time ; , immense intages^xwilli'',,^ by ( the iditioii.of ithe rotary; motion^, '.Tojknl^ vo.bir^s.-^itli.yne'stone but partially 9Xfesses,- .the \ havoc that. niay.,,'be .accomlislied by an !adept. ( ' As -fco'larraers, the'^, tayfprepare' for ,a ( grand revival pf^he ■arden o^Ed'en, ," with ( , its]' original'; dfati o^jfar'nicnie^ What^fith self-unloading orse'-hay'and grain r'aJ£,es,;and ( steam ai§- t srs anjd cultivsvCors^that are , expected to 1 , juse' an, entire ,r.3vo|.ution in ,agri'culiure, •thello's [ Occupation j will" b]ej gope^'.iind i?ne and' siixew wiU' resorjj'-t'o'.'Dio,, 'Lewis' j'r perpetuity, J" .'/' ..',,,, .. ( -, \ t lr ; ; i . Heretofore, '^traVjßllhig has been baraifiQ :Vtb.e ."Topodicticon" re'dupes it to. a :ienpe! . M TJiis magic U ( monitor ' is . .applied' D^he inside 1 of rauroad'and stre^t'.carsfc. idica^ette ' ap^roiaching ' stationj pv 'street, lie' name' appearing, in letters- sufficiently' ixge t ( o be read ffom/anjr 'part bf'tlje'car. n additioii,, a 'bell 'is 'struck 'before ; arivin'g 'at!' each station,, and r a rising' aiid illing index! on. ,a' graduated .scale, ex : |biis the progress by ; the. cars ; (liilethe scale b'ears^ the' name of all the taiibjiis^ together' with' the distance 's'e-; larating one fromih^ptliierl''' Besides^ an ttacliinen fc" ' shows ho\y-, , niany mpes _ per iq'ur 'the,', cars' are ,'moving^at' .any given fibment.' , Here aTe statistics' "and "geo-.' ■rapliy- in .one easy : „leason, „to .^say lothing' 'of' convenience 1 '. .tq-' tlie tra,eller'. and^ pleasurable "' distraction .'to he "Human J mind, "'-, that' may turn rom 'the • ,of , cabbages ', 'and t6rie' f ' 'fences ''without 'to ' v tlie' more Loyel.'panorama of theiudex within. The ?oppdicticon and, a rieiv device 'called ,the ( Ticket Safe,"' by which '; each passenger las his !seaf or, berth "ever secured,' are leatined to, exert a grand mpral influence ipon travelling ; ' • and ' dishonesty itself aust- become extiiict when , the; erige Lock',' 3 '•which'can i >ieither be picked,' ibr° ' exploded^,.. and the ( r !|,'Tell - {ale 31dck y ;",,wh{9h regist6rs' 'the. regularity' of vatchmeii's/. services,' are" ' .universally, idopted; >, - , -'„,-/■ •' 1 ,'Afte)c- ; all ?) . Europe" "may 'gaze .with, jrealesi amazement 'upon , "'a' single-3reaste<l-^frock*'.coat."," bailors, jeing infinitely inferior ' to, our , own '; -or ih6iild' J not, this extort exclamation, surely, !C specimens' of ,', crinoline'' -will.'' ,'Tij'is, il^ys, a, pleasureable/ aiid ' useful^ employment' 'to" carry' v coal to ". New castle, ; particularly,' 'when there'is'ho.jin.qre^ deji iiiand'''for' ( ;the''f,uel''than" y th'ere was; .for LqrdrTimdtliy Dexter's". warming-pans inbh'e" Gulf^ pf / Mexico' ; still, ' as i historical repiin^lcences, crinoline , ,must. ( J alji7ay^" reC-main-interesiingV, in'obstjimes, .a^matter Upon >yhich" 'the "Parisian 1 Cominissiqne,r3 h.ave.iaid.great.stress, . we ar^'notj-likely tb'bear;'off the palm;)' ,' v . I. doubt," ysrites rtiir f 'abie'"Oommissi6ner^'.;,]^/|Beckwith3 f'if.ybu^fll'beable to^make a 'collection bf^atiVj'e^c.osiumes/.tha.i; ( wilt'be'' ( yery mieresltng'd^ jns'jtriictiyej- wheiher, in a historical pr ( ' an ethnplogical.^'en^e ." \rl^pt,"a\ r l^pt," a coll^ptlonj': 1 but'- .Mr cJße.ck\vithc JBe.ck\vith pyerloqii^d ojar^ mo l deV 'dress : ,w, omen', .f ['beiifg^ jtne^ ref pr^jdfess. .or -Americaii .cosfuqae w,hich"-.obi;ained^the- premium oj iOOdoL jal">h6^enth' t annual : m'ee'ting '6] the", World/sl Health o . Association',;' at -.St! Aiithqn^' ,3SCnn/, J . 7une'U/l^Q5. } f ) iri ,Jx Francei where I3ea,uty;'an| grace. are "inprt !than ayiianie,' the' A'm"e'ric?,n wil receive "jniost friendly criticism, "and 'tn< r,efdrna^mp^ement'^ell ( the ,' number of. its fQ^owers/^in; consequence: ' There !isVno Iprenchwoman' takes' to so na '.t^rafly- as angularity.,.', "'r. i",'.' „-r'i ',\ .i... '•' Sb^toojTrmay^we- teach''',ihe (j -Eurppea| J young'idea f^ke" > meaning L of * model deski apef slates— slates,,th.at, -nev.er f break, a jneHrer;be]conie'glbssy ? ' and { tnat are'eheape: andjHkhterJllh^n-any; slate's.' eve^' befon |drcjaiij.ed!-<bi'; 'desks". with J ; a!, chair, attach" .m'ent'^whicli ; takes ', up. /.no / ;rppm. ,01 ' the" '.'.fjopr'.'/tnot^ ' ', by the n des] itself,', an, invention , completely- disprov .liigj'the j v once. undoubted", 1 axiom ttha jtwib things could' t not .occupy .'the sami ipa^e'^at^'jElie; same., 'time. '/ ;The ■ entju;i .oyerthrow^ofj Euclid, ,byrthe"Uniyersa Tanlkee' Nation is" merely v a question 0 time, and Archimedes himself would b

proud.to father the " Archimedean Veni i tiUil(or.",..i yy r hen it i 3 applied to fchiinrieys-'' ,iaioke>mu3ti ascend'; Trhen employed in airing .rooms ventilation' becomes ihevit- 1 ' *■ able, r., As. French fire-places are, peculiarly, successful intending all heaVup the ' chimney, and lalli the smokVciowTn.'ahd'as- 1 " ' the, Italians haye >a> superstitious dread of ' ' sleeping' window. • open, it Europe offers a ' fine -field of .for the-iArcM- 1 - ■ medean VeMilatbr.; ) •/.Oi^-'opA* i-'-.'r , ■ >*.'' • I /Optimists though we'be,!'grive; doubts 1 ' > ■ possess us at thought! of the' consequences' ; that ,may occur upon the introductioni'tb- ' (Europe) of .at -least one prominent' &nieri-'' ■ ! ;can institution •; .we refer to our 'country's- 1 - ' • hope^and p'ride^ that Bar, Mat I which ,>a.' _• ima.jo.rity. of. her citizens <*.and>!all-:<o£l her- 1 « ; legislators, jate'' brought . up ; >and %hichx '■" ,is productive of the greatenpart-of-the elo 1 - '" q nenqe..tha^ .<iistinguish.es 'America above i" all civiljsed t nationSi Not one but[ several-" (i \ are the applications for the" 'carrying 1 out L'• of, pur mosij active -Democratic 'principles;*- •" There, is a, ';" model portable ft ar '. with' ■•*■"' patent liquor stopple,. air-'t»ght,'! proof '' against -insects," * land' everything; but- ' drunkenness'; and there is' the' • cpn I'Bar," I, in ...which great -expectations -« may he ; invpsted, as it is '• claimed "thati :> this will be, thorough and true 1 .manner' , of, , .shpwingr jthe different liquors, beve- ' • r rages, and, drinking, customs, of /the Ame- • ,rjcanp,eopl<?.". ,E,ven now, in .our mind's • .eye we, see Paris. intoxicated with. "Ame- > •■; ric, p.n drinking customs," , -.and . .hear ( the' . ' '^aiibourg • St. , Germain, ..'discussing the-- . ' comparative merits of cobblers', slings,- 1 • .smashes, f and juleps. Even now, we descry 1 .'.•• Alexander , Dumas, pere,< frantically .rush?) .. , ing ' about with „ " The -Bar-rrpom" ': ,odm- : . ; [ panion," in ,pne hand and,, a straw in the . o.tlier, , As ' 'straws show which way.the wind \ ■ blawSj" we ,fear,for, ,the. future. .; 'We. see- „J him 1 attempting., to swallow successively, ,- i'o?bmand Jerry," a V: Split . Ticket,'? a.', 'j Stone" Wall,". "Pig , and .Whistle," andi. a "Race Hprse ;" and .lateri we discover 1 - ■ iliim.' writing 1 the, Romance of , a Sherry . C9bbler. ■ • Offenbach, ; j equally, i inspired, : will introduce, in i his/, ft next,,, opera. jßquffe -an, American,. bar, where , Apollo, .": afjier '„ miscellaneous ; ,bibuations,-..< will . t faypr^, .th.e ; , audience with „..the < .rbrin- .. idisi,[ ,of , the ■ ,Cock ' i Tail;^.faunsi : v and : ; sityrs^will go through all ." thei drinking-, : cistoms of. the American .people,", to the , .chorus of i"|Tip and Ty.'^ Nor should we; be at all surprised if Bacchus, •, disguised.' , as • anf "humble • individual,"-' -. and . withaglassof " moral suasion" in his hand, attempted to "swing round- the circle'^to--the appropriate tune of "Dixie," which. . Offenbach ,w,ould know- so 'well- how to . introduce! , Oh , that France should put an, enemy into her Exposition to steal i. away,her brains, !^rr, • i, ;<1 1, ,,-,;. ,•,,,; . In order .that the, world may, not grow , ; too .'giddy , f r,om 1 excess, of- pleasure} .Ame- • , ,rica makes i( amends f or. her Bar, Dy ex-, hibiting r '.'specimens .of Burial Caskets," 'accompanied by a'",", Treatise on Cholera.'' In continuance ipf. this agreeable sugges- ' , tion, ; , the , (Imperial : Government/ has . , thoughtfully laid^out a.-Oemetery fQr the- • • .sole , use, r of'; visitors ;. to .the, Exposition. \ , Were , optimism .-not our creed^ we might > 1 ■ ,be inclined, to; regard Paris- as", !■?.;,; -;;h „> , : .", "jChat : bourne, from whence - no. traveller - . • w r:.'jl + returns."., -, -.> ■, ' j ,'« ... <L:'in 1 ••' < \ As it'is, ■ however, we are 1 -lost -in admi- '- -at these excellent • provisions ' for " ' ' paying' the debts of .riature^and the paren- ' tal -watchfulness of Eranceoverthe'earthly'- ' comfott bf' its' guests. ■'.- ' 1 '■'^' ■'■ '■ ■ 1 ' finally S> America crowns 'her inventive 1 - :gehius witha' wondrous piece "of embfoi-' dery—^metaphysics in, Satin' -stitch— repr'e-.< % 'seiiting a- - a Query on the Futufe {"-'whichj' • ' ' in a' silent- tongue', xindoubtedly tskd the, '' pertinent 'question,' fC What* are v .we all' ' coming j to* V* ' rßoldly J we' f reply^ 1 » » "' the; • •milleniuiri !" for when "worsted 'work be- ; comes .transfigured by philosophy, wnat" ' .'can' mah foresee but a' pair of J "wings', 1 and ! the ! good time coming f .■■i- ' i >'- ' ' • ''■';' ' „,-j „i-/n // , -^ ' - > T' "''• f -'i •'■ . ir "' '.'• ;-;f w, r i >■ .{ . ■ . •:. •' .".' '. 1 "•»•"» f ■■■> ■<■ •' . Gold .mines "arebeing rapidly developed ia ' iVirginia. - r ,Thia fall. there will be 17 in Spott- -^

i .vuipepper, urange, ana juouis» t, counties.,— Scientific American.'^ ; ,[. . r v [, v, 'jlhe;|Parisj,. journals'"!' devoted /to ■ ladies*;: j fashions say: that the , color .of. dresses, thisv , t. winter.is, to.be 'a. pale green,, ;and;, that petti- : \.' j' t cqatV'^'ajfejto'bej longer than last year, ,but x , [' 'ate 't'^W raised by numer.ous! flock stijaps,-,.; , held' by',ch'alhs,'of ebony, 'fastened' to' 4 the "i I ' : > J t ' '*'.!. '^}>S '■'•'■ "'•'The' I 'territory recently purchased, by the '[ United ' States from Russia, seems already to • Wye- attracted 'a' charactertetib lJJ sh'aVe''of '' r.', spoculative'-ativityj'-'sueh asr'tb^rii'ftify '!the '' }. prognostic'atvms'qf MrSeward: 7 Enterprises' ' B of every des sriptibn, it is 'said^are springing" \ .up, which' proinise to develop* a'-vastf Pacific r tradey,. " Building lotsvhave '^advanced ' c several, hundred 'dollarsVin prico'.cai^-New'v • • AjrqbangeL and Sitkafm ..anticipation, .oX a-, 1 large .f10w , , . of ,' emigratiojr )i .tbither," 1/ { and £ numerous * parties " ( are ,- ( organizing in . CaUr. 1 1 1 forni* to proceed ' to ( the 'territory tl to reap^, the' Wealth' ,afforded .in her", goldy" copper,,,. „ and 'coal 'mines} 'forj trade, and fisheries.". The shipbuilders' on Puget Sound are looking ' ?, for extensive'drders' iii' connection with. ,lhe ' * t^affic.to be opened'' up,- and a T United J States -> f navy-yard is to be established on Cambridge c Island. — Morgan 1 strode Circular.

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