CUNT DRY'S MARVEL.

Otago Daily Times, Issue 11400, 18 April 1899, Page 3

CUNT DRY'S MARVEL.

TOM' 3 IDEA WAS BOUND TO 3E A

GREAT SUCCESS.

I suppose you ail know Tom Scrooloose. And if you don't, you know others like him. Ho is always on the brink of making a fortune. In fact, he can balance himself upon a brink longer than anybody that I know. Nice fellow is Scrooloose. Everybody likes ■him; amiable and obliging,' but—well, he's Scrooloose. I never meat him but ho has seme new scheme. Yesterday lie invited me out to lunch. Nothing'of the deridboat about Scroolo3o . The luncheon ordered, he broke out — "Old man, I've hit it at las!.. Biggest idea of the age. No more hand-to-mouth existence for ms after I get my invention patented. Can't possibly slip up this time, and the initial expanses will be small." "What's the scheme?" I asked, with some of his enthusiasm; " You know how the East Indian fakirs show you a seed and" cause it to develop into a plant and to bud, blossom, and bear fruit while you wait*'" "I have read of such things," said I, cautiously. •Well. I will show a mans life while you wail. From' birth to old age. You may watch tho development of character from day to day by means of my invention, and all in •the space of a minute. You see, I have a nephew a week old. I also know a photographer very well. Every day since its birth I have had the baby's picture taken. Only the head and face, mind you." "I see," said I. ''Well, sir, I have made arrangements with that'photographer'.to lake a picture of my nephew ever? day at noon until he is 70 years old. Catch on? The change from day to day will he very gradual, but by the- time he has filled out the allotted span I shall have upwards of 26,000 picture-!. These films will all be joined in chronological order, ami then by runnins them through a vitascope in the ii'iual wav I'll have it whole life thrown upon the screen. Sublime idea! I'll hire a suitable theatre and fill it full of capitalists, promoters, and newspaper men. I'll hold the initial picture of my cunning little nephew upon the screen for a minute th-it they may study his features, and then I'll say- ' Here's what you may call a fast life,' start the thing a-going and "the face will run through the seven ages in a couple of minutes. Very interesting to everyone. Imagine the sensation! Why, I'll sell my rights to every country on the globe before I leave the place, and I'll be rich beyond the wildest dreams of avarice. Perfectly feasible, too, isn't ;tV You're always picking flaws in my inventions, but you can't find anything the matter with this. I expect to show the tiling next winter, and after that I'll live like a prince. Have something elee, won't you? ' I declined with thanks, and with real regret I said—" It's ail right, old man, but for one thing. The idea is great, and thero's money in it, but have you considered that it will take just 70 years to complete your collection of ' human documents?' Whore do you expect to he 70 years from now? His monosyllabic response may have been an answer to my question, or it may have been an expletive merely.—New York World.