PASSING'NOTES.

Otago Daily Times, Issue 7253, 16 May 1885, Page 2 (Supplement)

PASSING'NOTES.

(From Otago Witness,)

"There is in the statistical information prefixed to Letts' Diaries n curious table, headed "The cost of war in time of peace." After giving tho armament of tho European States when on a peace footing, tho table shows the "number of working daya annually lost in unproductive war purposes." Tho total is equal to 3,481,649 yean; bo that, aa tha compiler remarks, "'estimating each day's labour at Ss, tho sum of £12G.080,200 ia lost by military exercise every year." Then, remembering that each soldier mnst be fed whilst he stands idle, must be clothed, armed, and paid wages; remembering also tbe expenditure on ships, fortresses, cannon, and other material of war, one begins to sea looming up a stupendous grand total which it is useless attempting to express in figures, for no human brain conld grasp them, but which may be accurately described aa poverty and mißory, hunger and- cold, for millions. This is what the producing classes pay for the privilege of being governed by kings, and a military caste. It Is needless to oay that it is the kings and military caate who make wars, - and not tbe people. Prom this point of view I sympathise with Mr Gladstone's persistent, and at last auccesaful, endeavour to settle our dispute with Russia by tbe methods of civilisa tion rather than by resort to the savagery of brute foroe. It is high time the States of Europe began to drop the morals of cardsharpera and duellists. The State that sets the example wins more honour than could ever be won by fighting. And this I will maintain, let Jingoes bowl and bowl bb they may.

The Mahdi haa presented to the Ozar of ■Russia 6000 camelß fully equipped and carefully refrigorated to a temperature that will enable them to endure the climate of Turkestan, Simultaneously Osman Digna has addrossed to General Komaroff a letter breathing the warmest protestations of gratitude and friendship. The above are announcements that we may now hourly expect by cable. If ever gratitude was due from man to his fellow man nurely itia due by the Mabdi and Osman Digna to the Ozar. Upon the news of Gordon's death the Gladstone Cabinet, relentless and immovable as they have always proved themselves, came to a certain decision. That decision was that "the power of the Mahdi must be broken," and Lord Wolseley was promptly instructed to perform the operation. Wolseley could not do it with the forces at his command. He said as much, and commenced a masterly

treat. TheGladstoneOabinetneverthelessheld firm to their decision. The campaign was righteous" and necessary, and must be maintained. Troops were massed at Suakin, the New South Wales contingent were hurriedly transported to the seat of war, and the railway to Barber was commenced. The ultimate fate of the Mahdi and hiß backers was sealed. Then came that most opportune diversion on the part of the Kuesiana. It has terminated peacefully, and at no point had it any bearing on the right or the wrong of the Soudan affair, And yet the Afghan fiasco has ended the war in the Soudan, The Soudan campaign which was necessary a few weeks ago—surely nothing but necessity would justify a vast expenditure of English money and life, and the slaughter of thousands of brave Arabs— ia suddenly found not necessary at all. The fact la strange, but true. The abandonment of the Soudan, as now propounded, Beams morally and politically right, but the qnestioa is, why was it not resolvod on before ? What shall be aaid of the unfortunate English gentlemen, and the brave soldiers under them, who have uselessly Baorificed their lives in the desert ? If Englishmen wish to maintain an unruffled calm and a good digestion the best way is to avoid altogether thinking of bo unpleasant a Bubject. As for New South Wales, it will be a case of "home she brought her warriors dread." The consolation is that thoy might have been brought home in a very much worse condition.

It is impossible to say that Mr R. T. Booth with all his earnestness and all hia ingenuity has made out a very crushing ouso against tho moderate drinkers. Tho arguments brought forward when relentlessly sif tod appear to amount to about this: "Rfigard me attentively, lam convinced. I believa this. No power on earth shall make me believe otherwise. Charitably giving you credit for ordinary common sense, I cannot believe that you can believe differently to what I believe "—and so on. There is a great deal of believing, but very little Bound argument. Dismissing St. Paul's well-worn advice to Timothy, " Take a little wine for thy stomach's aake," Mr Booth is reported to have argued thus:

" The text itself waa evidence that Timothy was an abstainer and a water-drinker, and there was no evidenoe that he took Paul's advice and used ever so little wine. The speaker, in default of this, would always believe that Timothy lived and died true to his Nazarite vow."

But does Mr Booth see that he makes a convenient little circle round the question by this line of argument? The quotation iB never used by moderate drinkers with any reference wb»tever to Timothy's abstinence or nonflbßtineooe. Mr Booth's belief that Timothy died a teetotaller has nothing whatever to do with St. Paul's precept, whioh is the particular barrier be undertook to attack. Did St. Paul give the advice, or did he not? If he did, let Mr Booth Btand boldly up and say that the apostle meant a non-alcoholic beverage— tringer ale or zoedone for instance,—or else ipt him say nothing at all'about the matter beyond his exquisitely audacious suggestion that perhaps the wine was intended for " external application only I" Throughout his lecture Mr Booth pursued similar tactics. He " needed no evidence " aB to the non-intoxica-ting pftture of the wine miraoulously made at Cana of Galilee, because no power on earth, short of the absolute statement of Scripture, should make him believe that it was intoxicating, This position again may be eminently natisfaoiory to Mr Bootii, but it leaves the moderate drinkers whom be wan addressing about in statu quo. Seeing that there are bo many allusions in the New Testament to wine, evidently ea aa intoxicating liquor, jnoderate drinkers might very reasonably reply that, although Mr Booth did »ot require evidence Bjx>n the point, they did.

Will it, I wopder, ever ocour to total abatintmce advocates tfaot to call upon the many to beoome bigots for the nalvation of the few ia not preoiaaly the way to oombino virtue with a due regard to liberty. Let us nay that among ten men thrown together one man pereiatently endangers his physical and moral welfare by " overcrowding" himßelf (as iho Americans havo it) with beef. If the moderoto beefeaters oonld hit upon no better way of remedying the error of their brother than by tbembolvss forswearing beef from that day forth for everiiiore, posterity would have but one name for these virtuous ten. It would call them idiots. The fast of the matter is that Englishmen—the large bdy of "sensible tern perate men "to whom Mr Booth appaajed—ha ye their sentiments concerning the drunkard, and these are not exaotly the sentiments of Mr Booth. Whilst sharing his feeling of pity for weak-kneed sots—and perhaps mingling with ft a shade of contempt—they fail to see that the drunkard is to be idolised and pampered above other men. They refubo to allow the habits of tho civilised world to be completely changed and -creature comforts that are munificently provided for the help and sustenance of man to vanish from every table op his account. The drunkard in too poor a ereatara for this yet. In one sense ba ia a power in the State already, but he has to rise higher before he will be able to sway all men to his neeecsities. No 1 looked at from the standpoint of thg majority, the drunkard has to be reformed to the level of the moderate druskflr; not the moderate drinker to the level of the drunkard. But temperance lecturers will be the last to reoognise this.

There is fresh evidence this week that the Chinese in our midst are learning to enjoy in gome small degree the blessings of Christian civilisation, The thing is but a trifle in itself, but it speaks volumes. Wo read in the newspapers that Ohiok Yu and Ah gun, market gardeners, of JJanedin, have filed a depuration of insolvency—liabilities, £534; assets, £10, This shows as much real progress as would be represented by a good many pageß^ of missionary 'reports, The Chinamen in question hay« realised the advantages of the Bankruptcy Aot in s\\ their Bolomn magnitude, and they bave reaoi«d forthwith to avail themselves of this—one of the most glorious of British institutions, With them to determine was to do, pndthey were careful, in doing, to do the thing weii. Liabilities £500 and aaeejs £10 is respectable! Jf tbo »aßßts CDnl(* ou'? kave keen reduced' ta JOd it would have been sublime. Presumably Chick Yu and his partner scarcely saw their way to &>*.< I(; waß ft first attemP'. amaoking, indeed, in somo .degree of a national •nterpriße, and caution was indispensable. But the ice once broken, the compa^viotß of Chick Yu and Ah Kun may be expected fc? tine to noble things in the way of insolvency. #»w ago, aooordlnu to Bret Harte, Chinamen

mastered tha intricacies of eucihre, and they have now added to this a fair knowledge of the art of bankruptcy. It really seoms that if they would only eschew opium and take to tobacco and Colonial beer thero is nothing to prevent the Oaltstiala attaining all the virtues of the higher civilisation.

A correspondent who has "serious thoughta" of getting into Parliament (modeßt man I) draws an uncomfortable picture of what may happen in case, aa Sir Julius Vogel proposes, a political career is opened to women :

Conscious aa I am, ray dear " Civia, of weakness, I hesitate,-1 tremble at the thought of being associated possibly with a bewitching and irresistible colleague in the representation of, say, Duneclin, and of the manner in which I might become subject to her fascinations. The lady who, unknown (and shall I, can I, believe that it is really unknown) to herself, exercises at preaent a fatal spell over me, and to whom 1 teel I shall pop the question almost immediately, has particular ways of looking at one that I defy any fellow to resist, and if Bhe wero to get into Parliament and choae to do up her hair ia a particular style, which reduces me to a state of painful imbecility, she could carry any Bill.

The presumption is, I fanoy, thatsofasoinating a piece of clay will find more profitable occupation for her fatal charms than that of employing them to carry Bills. The women who want to get into Parliament are not that Bort of women at all. Before uho takes to politics a woman will have tried a good many styles of doing up hor hair, and will have lost faith in them all. I can conceive a "Girton girl" who might make it very difficult for a male examiner to pluck her—if the examination wore oral; but, depond upon it, there will never be a female M.H R. who3e influence on a division will extend beyond her vote, And here let me suggest to the Dunodin Parliamentary Union that they might do a worse thing than invite Mra Ward nnd tho political Bisterhood she ropreaeuta to take seats in their honourable House. Fiat txpmmentum in corpore vili. Either that, or the Young Women's Christian Association should organise a Parliamentary Union of their own.

The gradual extension of the telephone to private houses openß up a vista of possibilities not altogether reassuring to anxious parents and suspicions husbands, A whole Decameron of intrigue lies perdu in the domestic telephone, and some day a new Boccaccio will arise to develop and describe it, I have nothing at present to record in that line, but the following incident, communicated to mo by a lady, shows that the Bocial uses of the telephone are beginning to be understood: — One of our leading officials (from whom I had this account) has lately had a telephone put in his private residence. The other day, in his absence, the bell rang violently. His wife put her ear to the instrument expecting an order about forgotten keys or papers, or perchance a notification that he would not be home to dinner. She heard the words "Send Mary Jano," in. emphatio tones, Mary Jane is the name of my friend's cook, "Who is speaking?" asked the_ lady, not doubting that it was a communication from her husband about dinner. •' Mrs Brown's cook," was tho unexpected reply; "and send Mary Jane at once, please." The bewildered lady called her cook in obedience to this imperious mandate, when it appeared that the darasel_ at the other end- merely found time hanging heavily on her hands, and so wished to solace herßelf with a little social chat with her various friends.

Wh<»t we are coming to, I suppose, is that servants, when engaging, will stipulate for the "use of the telephone" at certain houra of the day. Mary Jane will then be able to ring up her young man to spend the evening with her, as master and mis3iis aro ;dining ont, or may exchange audible though unsubstantial kisses with him as a pledge of better things when they meet. The risk in tranbmitting endearments by telephone is that the operator at the telegraph-office may connect you with the wrong number. The beautiful complications thus rendered possible I leave for development to the future Boccaccio. An example— an innocent one, aa it happens—is just now going the rounds of the papers. A young business man rung up, calling for a gentleman friend. The telephone operator mistook the number, and a lady's voice answered, " Hallo, what do you want ?" " Well, who are you ?" " I'm 70." " You're too old ; I want 17." Tableau.

Notice is hereby given, that no more war Bongs can be received at this office except in the form of advertisements, accompanied by a remittance. The editor has positively no room even in his wastepaper basket, for more patriotic poetry, though its merit should equal that of the following :—

Australia: land of the free, Faith, bope, and of charity, Bids England's soldier and Bailor To find a friend in Australia. . Bravest of the Colonies she, Whose sons have crossed the raging sea, For England in her difficulty, To fight for their Queen and Australia. Correspondents are informed that eulogies of the "Australians who have crossed the sea for England in her difficulty," are now painfully inappropriate, the said Australians being about to recross the Ben and rejoin the ranks of the Australian unemployed, England having no further use for their services. They set out with the excellent intention of smashing the Mahdi; they return re infecta, — through no fault of theirs, of course—but still the fact is bo. Naturally their incoming will not be exactly on the aamo soale of glory as their outgoing, and poetry on the Bubject wil not be required. Then, aa regards the Afghan affair, poeta are notified that untoward circumstances have ruined our hopes in that quarter, and the battle of Armageddon ia indefinitely postponed. These things being so, the " Old Flag" has been hauled down, not to be hoisted again until times improve, and the "Islands of the Free" have incontinently sunk out of sight in the ocean of Oblivion, I have a melancholy pleasure in cbronioling these facts for the discouragement of other barda who were " tuning up."

In re this lay of Mr Bracken's, the " Islands of tho Free," a somewhat censorious critic sends me the following:—

Dear Civis, —I went to the patriotic ooncert expecting, after your sage (but not at all green) advice, to bear something like this: The Russians came down on the Isles of the

Free, But tho "loyal defenders" were gone up a

tree. (Spoken.) So the Bear had to " paws " for a reply, until, remembering your far-pervading influence, he naturally acted as follows, and allowed me to complete the verse: He then "went for" "Civis" to give him a

pill, But non cst inventus— behind Flagstaff Hill. As a matter of fact, I did think it a very small "lay" for auah a big bird, and was inclined to say, with the Jackdaw of Rheims, " Don't do so any ' mos.'" I have received also "a patriotic eong from another point of view," whereof the opening vereeß run thus : There's ados! of "brag" in the "Grand Old

Flag" And the " Islands of the Free "; It hardly suits for raw recruits To crow bo lustily. They're far away—long may they stay— The Russians, o'or the sea; We make more fuss about the Rush,

Than he makes ovor we. To the same purport singeth another, for whom—not to be partial—l find room to the extent of one verae; The G.O.M. loquitur :

Some people rave of war, Tho' they don't care what it's for; But if the future's horoscope you scan, You will see that peace h Nat; So we'll Bimply shelve the rest. That's the dictum of "the Grand Old Man." From henceforth let no poet or poetaster trouble me, Metrical communications on the subject o* .sjther the war or the peace must be addressed to some other office. ■ Civis,