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Otago Daily Times, Issue 545, 16 September 1863, Page 5

" Where'is the"■■hoe, Sambo?" "Wid de rake, massa." "Well, where is the rake1}" " Why, wid de hoe. "Well, well, where are they both?" " Why, both together, massa; you'paars to be berry 'ticular dis morning V Painiul JNecessity. — During the long drought of last summer, an American paper saya, water become jso scarce in a certain parish, that the faprngrs' wives were obliged to send their milk to. town-genuine. Benevolence does not measure its charities too nicely. The clouds never send down to ask the grass and plants below how much they need; they rain for the relief of their own bosoms. -/

Three or four times a couple appeared before a clergyman for marriage, but the bridegroom was drunk, and the rev. gentleman refused to tie the knot, .Qn the last occasion lie expressed his surprise .that so >respectab!e a looking girl was not ashamed to appear ai the altar with a man in such a state. The poor girl burst into teai-s, and said she could not help it. * And why, pray V 'Because, sir,, he won't come wjieu he's so^r.'

"Which of the feathered tribes lifts the heaviest weight? The crane.