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Oamaru Mail, Volume I, Issue 303, 13 April 1877, Page 4

To the question, "What m a flirt I" Longfellow replies, "A young fatty of more beauty than sense; more accomplishments than learning; more charms of person than grace of mind ; more admirers than friends ; mere fools than wise men for attendants." A beam fell on a man's head the other day from an immense height. Of coarse he was killed 1 Not at all; he walked on •nailing softly, and looking as if he liked that sort of thing. Perhaps it ought to be explained that the beam in question was a sunbeam. An orchtn not quite three years old said to his sister, while munching a piece of gingerbread, " Sis, take half of this cake to keep to afternoon, when I get cross." This is nearly as good as the story of the child who bellowed from the top of the stairs, "Ma, Hannah won't pacify." A gentleman who had taken a house not a hundred miles from Brechin, was making inquiry how often he could get "ye maun gi'e your orders aforehand, for oor butcher just kills half a beast at ance."" The following is a genuine copy of a B made out by an ostler of an inn in Dorsetshire :—■** Afortheos (hay &>? the horse), 3d.; elininosansha (cleaning horse Aid chaise), 4d.; brinionimonigin (bringing him home again), 6d.—total, Is. Id."