LONDON TOWN TALK.

Oamaru Mail, Volume I, Issue 247, 6 February 1877, Page 2

LONDON TOWN TALK.

(From the Argus' Correspondent.) I have as yet seen in no London paper the very best bon-mot I have ever heard upon a public matter. How did it happen that the late Arctic Expedition came to miss the North Pole 1 Because those on the Discovery were not on the Alert. Nothing, by-the-bye, has excited more public indignation against Mr. Ward Hunt than his rumoured conduct towards the Arctic captains. I say rumoured, because I havo not seen it contradicted, and because it is characteristic enough to be true. He ia said to have reprimanded them for coming up to town without reporting themselves, and to have sent them back to their ships at Spithead. jS ow, though this may have lain within the strict lines of his duty, | every man with an intelligence beyond that of a common policeman would hate avoided under the circumstances such an act of authority. Moreover, in his it is especially " bad form," since no man has made more mistakes, or cost the country so much, as Mr. Ward Hunt—not, indeed, by leaving his post, but by stopping in it. The "case of the barrister accused of throwing Ids wife over the Stelvio Pass has become a subject of much interest. The whole story was common talk enough this autumn among the tourists in that district who had returned to England, long before any legal proceedings were taken. And that the law was put in motion in the matter was owing, I am informed, to a well-known novelist, who, being on the spot, and having perhaps a professional feeling for the romance of the adventure, caused the affair to be taken up. Of course it is freely stated that this is not the first wife the accused has treated in a similar manner. One would imagine, indeed, to hear some folks talk, that he had made a practice of pushing wives down mountain passes every long vacation (for he is a barrister); but I believe that it is really true that in addition to this present "unpleasantness" he had the misfortune to shoot his mother- | in-law with a revolver—quite accidentally. The revolver went off, and the old lady happened to be within range ; that is really all, and even if it was not altogether aimless, she was his mother-in-law,-jfl|M some temptations are irresistible. Talking of shooting, a Jyw ha& another Jew at Ramsgate, ana a Hebrew gentleman writes to the papers to say that such a thing has never before been heard of. A Jew may have killed a Gentile or two, ages ago, he says, but for 200 years no Hebrew has ever suffered in England on a capital charge. I can only say that if this be so, the Jews—judging from my own personal acquaintance of them—must have had great luck. Lately, I saw, one " B. L." wrote that he thought it " highly undesirable" that the Jews should be considered better than other people, and pointed out that it was only twelve years, instead of 200, since one Mr. Levy, a, Jew, was hung in your part of the world, namely, at Nelson, in New Zealand—for helping to murder " between twenty and thirty people " —a very creditable endeavor, it must be confessed, upon his part, to '' restore the average." It is extraordinary how people besides those in want of money still contrive to interest themselves in the chosen race. In a late will case in Dublin a lady is. proved to have spent vast sums in " faci-. litating the return of the Jews to Palestine. " How she did this, except by paying their fares thither, is not stated. She spent much of her time in copying the four Gospels in needlework, and an Italian duplicate of them, wiiioh ought to have been German, since it was in Berlin wool. Believing also that after the rection the Just would be witho\it clothes, she employed herself in making garments for them—but all of a Lilliputian size—' to enable them to make a deoent appeals ance in public. In the case of this lady's will a compromise has been effected, the jury thinking it an open question whether she was mad or not. I need not add that it was an Irish one. Some curious incidents hare recently occurred in our competitive examinations, Tliere i 3 a gentleman-cadet at Woolwich, who, though only sixteen, and the youngest in his batch, has passed 3,000 marks ahead of my other competitor ; but he is so short of stature that the ties can only allow of liis admittanoe upon his solemn promise to grow. He actually obtained the full number of marks that it was possible to get in " obligatory mathematics," Because I have no love for the Turks, I do not therefore wish it to be believed that I have any high opinion of the Russians. The late trial of Dr. Strousberg—whose life is a romance of commerce not second in interest and splendor to that of John Law himself—proves how barbarous is that nation which is in the habit of calling herself "holy." The counsel for the Crown demanded a conviction upon the ground that Strousberg was a German, and had been a Jew, and the jury found every German prisoner guilty, and acquitted every Russian ! It is fair to add that the Emperor has mitigated the verdict so far as to send Strousberg out of the country, instead of to Siberia ; but the Russian proper still stands revealed. To show the contrast between a civilised and savage country, we had an English . T iudg\ recently sentencing a foreigner t \iulf hu

doe amount of imprisonment, with the remark, " Had yon been an Englishman, I shotttdfiave punished you twice as much. He may have been wrong (I think he was), but he certainly erred on the right side. A» for » " mixed jury," I suppose the .Russians could no more realise such an nstitutiou tliart they could imagine an wfficial who didn't take bribes T It must nut be supposed that ail the failures of our diplomatic system take place at Constantinople. In a certain capital nearer home—though stilt not so ver? near—there is an ambassador with a tempt*. To- call him hasty is to- use a very moderate expression indeed ; only to counterbalance this he has an itltotrh* whois us coolis a cucumber. *>ti a certain important occasion this young gentleman was sent for by his chief, and directed to start for England on a critical errand. ♦'Very good,. sir; how am I to go f t'CJo f Walk if you tike ; what do I carer' tt was not a time to discuss a ('mention of special trains, and besides that was a subject for another department. Tlit' cool, young man took six weeks to reach what is called in diplomatic jargon " the Court of St. James's." Everybody thought lie had been robbed and murdered, and his p lace was only not titled up because it was of no consequence. He wiis summoned,. of course, before the ITua.i.'U Cilice authorities, but stuck to tt that he had been told to '* walk if he lilted," and lie Imil liked. 'the " Portrait of the Duchess of Devonshire." purchased for £ and stole from the exhibition in Bond-street, is still advertised as missing. The advertisement is stated by the cynical _ to contain three Haws. They don't believe— £. Teat it WHS the portrait of the Duchess. L\ That £U).OO(>- was ever really given for it. 3, That it was ever stolen. This is worse than the commentary upon the usurer's statement that he was poor but honest—- " two lies in three words." The sentence passed upon Dr. Made, uud against which he has appealed, has given almost universal satisfaction, but tile people who cotpiet with these spiritual humbugs pretend to fear that such persecution may fan the Hauie of superstition. Wliy they have not used this argument in favor of the poor fortune-teller* alt these years I do not understand ; for if it is worth a farthing any vagabond who has been sent to prison for tricking servantmaids out of their wages must have given rigor to the practice. " That it is high time something should be done with these l * mediums, is evident, from the fact that a house is actually advertised this week as ];, miii.ablo for persons of this class, [•„ : .''re of a highly-spiritual r- ■ i 1 - .- v, ,-:••• ugat Manchester on the I .■ • tine successful students it* ambriilge examinations, ; ■ ' of York commented he resistance made to .v.■ m; -ii •• ntrodnce physical science •ik.> j.111■ ; • i- •: "Is, and deprecated Greek uud tjaw ; ' I"- made the staple ot education.