The Midnight Express

NZ Truth, Issue 978, 23 August 1924, Page 14

The Midnight Express

(By "Lilian.")

To. board a night express at a way 7 side station anywhere after midnight, i secure a seat and dispose of one's impedimenta with sang froid, is something of a,n achievement. Those of you who have ever done it will understand, The train does not stay long, so you hop on and burst open the door, to lurch ingloriously down the aisle as the engine starts. You endeavor, while grasping a suitcase m one hand and a large hatbox m the other, to preserve an air of dignity, , though you are painfully conscious that the sudden jerk which you have just undergone has tilted your hat to a ridiculous angle. Then you proceed to look around you for somewhere to sit, and for a vacant spaoe on the rack. Through the dim light you discern huddled forms and hear muttered imprecations. Feeling like an impostor you make yourself thoroughly unpopular 1 by shifting people's luggage to make room for your own. You waver between adopting -the aggressivo attitude or betaking your unworthy self into another, and perchance kindlier carriage. When you feel that the hand of fate is now thoroughly against you, you make the discovery that a seat Intended for two, is being occupied by one. You lurch towards it while with, a look of hostility the recumbent one sits up to make room for you. Revenge is sweet and later on when the door bursts open to precipitate another intruder halfway down the carriage, you sigh peevishly at the unbounded impudence of this disturber of the peace. When a meek little woman plunges m and seats herself apologetically on a hatbox rather than disturb a man who is occupying a whole seat, you feel nothing but tempt for her and cast a supercilious glance m her direction. The loud-voiced, overbearing people demand attention and despite inimical looks, appropriate a seat immediately. I once saw a man make a positively blatant entrance and hurl his suitcase on to the rack above a prone figure which, with a groan of anguish, materialised into a man— a man bent upon rescuing his battered Stetson from under a crushing weight. The despoiler immediately hopped into the seat. It struck me as being rather effective. I intend to practise it some time.