"THE ONLY ROBBIE"

NZ Truth, Issue 571, 27 May 1916, Page 7

"THE ONLY ROBBIE"

Emptied Out of the Empire

Comedy at the Magistrate's Court

Complainant Says he got "The Flying '• -■■-.•;•■■■;••■■?>•''•■■- ' .Mare" ■'' ■ '' : ■

The Magistrate's Court, Wellington, was as funny as a Charlie Chaplin picture on the afternoon or Friday week, j when John Sturrock Robbie (who can be seen at the "Duke" corner selling the morning "day- lies") charged Richard Dwyer and John Timmins with having assaulted him on the morning of May 4. "The only Robbie" described- himself /to be "a general agent." The defendants were represented by Mr. H. Evans, while John Sturrock was represented by himself, Mr. D. G. A. Cooper occupying the judicial chair. "The only" Robbie" led off by detailing a set of circumstances for the edification of the Magistrate, m which he alleged that he had gone to the Empire Hotel (of which Mr. Dwyer is the proprietor) and he had been ejected by the defendants. "I was having a bit of a talk with Mr. Dwyer, when John Timmins comes on the scene by wireless telegram. He gets hold of me, swings me oil his back, takes me up the steps and GIVES ME THE PLYING MARE over his shoulder clean into the road. I picked me hat up and Richard Dwyer shut half the door m me face," said the .complainant. '-'I then went to Inspector 'Hendrey and told him tho state I was in.v Mr. Evans read out a number of letters which the accused had Written to different hotel proprietors. . .. ~ At this stage the complainant turned liia back to the Bench and put his foot up on the Iron railing, which brought a sharp reprimand from Mr. Cooper, who rapped out, "Stand properly m the, box there, Robbie." Mr. Evans: Let us bear what occurred a week before?— Well, Dwyer assumes that which the Crown dare not assume. He declared me to be a pro--hlblted person. . The Bench: How? — Ho wouldn't allow me to have a drink m his hotel. Then he went into a long, rambling statement, the main points of which were to the effect thftt he had been In the passage and Mr. Dwyer had tried to bustle him out of the "pub." "I sidestepped him into the dive," said he. "Why didn't he put me out of there?" The complainant next went into a lot of detail of his going m with the constable m order to get some papers he wanted. Mr. Evans:- You have gone Into the bar and made a nuisance of yourself?— • How did I? ! I am not here to answer your questlonß?—Oh. yes < you are. Give me the evidence of It, . v Here the Bench told complainant to BEHAVE WITH DECORUM IN COURT. At the same time a bundle of "daylies" were produced and witness was asked If they were his. He looked at the name on the uuncilo und said, "That's Robbie. That's him— the only Robbie." Complainant next called the defendant. Richard. Dwyer. Complainant: You're Richard Dwyer, a Ho.tel-keeper?~Yes. Did you see some men struggling on the steps with a soldier? — Yea. What did 1 say?— (Here thero was a mighty quibble, "The only Robbie" beI mg -dissatisfied with. the answer he got from his own witness, commenced to cross-examino him. The S.M.: This is your witness, remember. Complainant: Yea. I know. He's doIng all right though. (Laughter.) Just as Mr. Dwyer was about to leave tho box "the only Robbie" called out. "Now, you remain t herd for a moment, my friend. 1 haven't quite done with you. What servant did t interfere with (there had been some talk of interfering with a servant)? 1 put down my money for a drink and asked for a drink. Is that Interfering?" Dwyer: I didn't wont you m the house. , ?' ho ,r.^ ox wna nft xt replenished with John Tlramlni*. who was put through the preliminaries by "Robbie " "The only ttobblft"- Wore you told that there was trouble In tho bar that morning? — No. Did you see Richard Dwyor holding 1 mo? — YeH. ; . Yet you say there was no trouble?— Yes. Who put mo out?— l did; but I don't know who gave you the final shovo. Did your Irish blood get up?— No\l was a bit nervous. (John weighs about twelve atone of muscle.) Why : should, you feel nervous?— l thought that you had a brick In your hand. Had you a prejudice against me?— No, I did ft from INSTRUCTIONS FROM THE "BOSS." This ended the pantomime, except for the ringing down of Die curtain, which S.M. Cooper did by saying to "The only Hobble." "If you Jfo thor© agralnst Mr, D*vy«r's« wlahcM h<> noa tho right to put you out if ho t:hoo»e» to do bo. The Information will* be dismissed."' No coata wero allowed.